Comments You Will Not Hear at the 4-17-05 WT Study (March 1, 2005 magazine issue date) Review comments will be in black and parentheses ()
WT quotes from today?s WT
will be in red and quotes ""Quotes from other sources
will be in blueWISE GUIDANCE FOR MARRIED COUPLES
"Let wives be in subjection to their husbands as to the Lord. Husbands, continue loving your wives."?EPHESIANS 5:22,25 (NWT)
22 Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ?25 Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church--a love marked by giving, not getting.?EPHESIANS 5:22,25 (MESSAGE BIBLE)
www.biblegateway.com /cgi-bin/bible
Opening Comments
Last week, the WTS would like us to believe that few JWs have problems with their marriages. But looking around the congregation, how many truly happy couples are there? And that doesn?t count the ones that no longer attend that congregation that have separated, divorced, and/or been DF?d.
Things to ponder as you peruse this article.
How has the guidance for married couples changed back and forth in the Bible?
Adam: one wife, Eve
Lamech: first recorded polygamist, 2 wives
Noah and his sons: back to one wife
Abraham: 2 wives at the same time
Jacob: 4 wives at the same time
David: 8 wives at the same time
Solomon: 1,000 wives at the same time
Christian elders: only one wife allowed
Why were the Israelites commanded to send away their foreign wives and children?
At length Ez´ra the priest rose and said to them: "YOU yourselves have acted unfaithfully in that YOU gave a dwelling to foreign wives so as to add to the guiltiness of Israel. 11
And now make confession to Jehovah the God of YOUR forefathers and do his pleasure and separate yourselves from the peoples of the land and from the foreign wives."EZRA 10:10-11
These all had accepted foreign wives, and they proceeded to send away wives along with sons.
EZRA 10:44
Why could Israelite men divorce their wives for reasons other than adultery?
Insight Book Volume 1
p. 640 Certificate of Divorce.It should not be concluded from the later abuses that the original Mosaic divorce concession made it easy for an Israelite husband to divorce his wife. In order to do so, he had to take formal steps. It was necessary to write a document, to "write out a certificate of divorce for her." The divorcing husband had to "put it in her hand and dismiss her from his house." (De 24:1) While the Scriptures do not provide additional details on this procedure, this legal step apparently involved consultation with duly authorized men, who might first endeavor to effect a reconciliation. The time involved in preparing the certificate and legally implementing the divorce would afford the divorcing husband opportunity to reconsider his decision. There would have to be a basis for the divorce, and when the regulation was properly applied, this would logically serve as a deterrent to rash action in obtaining divorces. Then, too, the wife?s rights and interests were thus protected. The Scriptures do not disclose the contents of the "certificate of divorce."
Why were Israelite women not allowed to divorce their unfaithful husbands?
Insight Volume #1
p. 640 DivorceHer position is further shown by Deuteronomy 24:1-4, which pointed out that the husband might divorce his wife but said nothing about the wife?s divorcing her husband. Being considered his property, she could not divorce him.
When the elders and ?mature? sisters point out that God hates a divorcing; what does that mean?
For he has hated a divorcing," Jehovah the God of Israel has said; . . .
MALACHI 2:16If it is true that God hated a divorcing in Malachi?s time, why were points 1 and 2 allowed above?
w02
5/1 p. 17 Jehovah Hates the Course of Treachery ***Those men were obtaining divorces on illegitimate grounds, wrongly leaving the wives of their youth, likely to marry younger or pagan women.
Notice how the WTS does not detail what were the legitimate grounds in Malachi?s time. Think about it, it couldn?t be adultery because adulterous women were killed not divorced.
Why wasn?t until 1947 that the WTS told its male members that they could no longer have multiple wives and be a member in good standing?
w95
9/1 p. 25 "Love Never Fails"But until 1947 when the missionaries came, polygamy was common in the congregations. Polygamous brothers were told that they had married more than one wife in ignorance. So if they had two or three or four or five wives, they could keep them, but they should not take any more. That was the policy we (the WTS) had.
And let us apply the WTS guidance in the future. In the organization there are many more women than men, and many of them are single women unable to find JW husbands. With the resurrected people not marrying and only JWs today surviving into the new world of the WTS making, who will these women marry? Grown up children of the survivors? Men from the same small pool that exists today? Will there be new light and polygamy once again be allowed?
START OF ARTICLE
Paragraph 1
Jesus said
that marriage is the yoking together by God of a man and a woman to be "one flesh." (Matthew 19:5,6) It involves two people with differing personalities learning to develop common interests and working together toward common goals. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, not a casual agreement that can be lightly abandoned. In many countries, divorce is not difficult to obtain, but in the eyes of a Christian, the marriage relationship is sacred. It is ended only for a very serious reason.?Matthew 19:9.Jesus said
Finally Jesus enters the picture. How long he will remain we will see.
Learning to develop common interests
I thought this was done before the marriage started?
Casual agreement that can be lightly abandoned
In many countries
Such as Hispanic countries, people don?t get divorced; they just move in with someone else. So while divorce is not easily obtained, it does not result in more stable marriages.Christian buzzword meaning only Jehovah?s WitnessesParagraph 2 One marriage counselor said: "A good marriage is a process of continual change as it reflects new issues, deals with problems that arise, and uses the resources available at each stage of life." Now who is this person, what are their credentials as a marriage counselor and what is the title, date, and page of this quotation? Same source as last week, still no attribution. If the WTS quotes from a non-JW clinical psychologist and specialist on divorce, can its members seek non-JW marriage counselors?The Good Marriage : How and Why Love Lastsby Judith S. Wallerstein , Sandra Blakeslee , page 24 "... is within the couple's power to nurture the marriage and prevent its deterioration. A good marriage is a process of continual change as it reflects new issues, deals with problems that arise, and uses the resources available at each stage of life. ..." Editorial Reviews
Amazon.com Inspired by the hope that the experience of satisfied husbands and wives might provide useful lessons to others, Wallerstein, a clinical psychologist and specialist on divorce, and Sandra Blakeslee, who writes frequently for The New York Times, interviewed 50 predominantly middle-class, northern California couples who had been married nine years or more and had at least one child. These strong marriages flourish, they argue, because every partner confronted a series of psychological tasks including separating emotionally from the family of childhood, carving out his or her autonomy and creating an environment where anger and conflict could be safely vented. The couples reveal their interior lives in rich, explicit detail.For Christian spouses, those resources include wise counsel from the Bible, support from fellow Christians, and a close, prayerful relationship with Jehovah. A successful marriage endures, and over the years, it brings happiness and contentment to husband and wife. More important, it brings honor to Jehovah God, the Originator of marriage.?Genesis 2:18, 21-24; 1 Corinthians 10:31; Ephesians 3:15; 1 Thessalonians 5:17. Christian or fellow Christians ? buzzword meaning only Jehovah?s WitnessesWise counsel from the BibleAs interpreted by the WT publications and the eldersEndures
- To carry on through, despite hardships; undergo: endure an Arctic winter.
- To bear with tolerance
Imitate Jesus and His Congregation His Congregation
This means only the 144,000, anointed, FDS/GB, etc.
Paragraph 3Two thousand years ago, the apostle Paul gave wise counsel to Christian couples when he wrote: "As the congregation is in subjection to the Christ, so let wives also be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, continue loving your wives, just as the Christ also loved the congregation and delivered up himself for it." (Ephesians 5:24,25) What fine comparisons are expressed here! Christian wives who keep in humble submission to their husbands imitate the congregation in recognizing and observing the headship principle. Believing husbands who continue to love their wives, whether in favorable or in trying times, demonstrate that they closely follow Christ?s example of loving the congregation and caring for it. Christian couples, Christian wives, but believing husbandsFrom now on you can substitute, only Jehovah?s Witnesses
Imitate the congregationBy being in subjection to Christ or the WTS congregation?
w02 10/1 p. 19 Cultivate Obedience as the End Draws Near ***By submitting to the slave class, God?s people also show their subjection to the Master, Jesus Christ.w90 11/15 p. 20 True Love Is Rewarding
If we love Jehovah, we will humble ourselves under his mighty hand. (1 Peter 5:6) Love for him will also move us to submit to his chosen instrument, "the faithful and discreet slave." Paragraph 4 Christian husbands are the heads of their families, but they too have a head, Jesus. (1 Corinthians 11:3) Hence as Jesus cared for his congregation, so husbands lovingly care for their families in a spiritual and physical way, even if that takes personal sacrifice. They put the welfare of their families ahead of their own desires and preferences. Jesus said: "All things, therefore that you want men to do to you, you also must likewise do to them." (Matthew 7:12) That principle applies with special force in marriage. Paul showed this when he said: "Husbands ought to be loving their wives as their own bodies?No man ever hated his own flesh, but he feeds and cherishes it." (Ephesians 5:28,29) A man should feed and cherish his wife with the same diligence that he feeds and cherishes himself. Husbands have a head, JesusOr is it the WTS they must look to for guidance?
w94 10/1 p. 8 The Bible?A Book Meant to Be Understood It helps us to understand the Word of God. All who want to understand the Bible should appreciate that the "greatly diversified wisdom of God" can become known only through Jehovah?s channel of communication, the faithful and discreet slave.?John 6:68. Put the welfare of their families ahead of their own desires and preferencesBut not ahead of the body of elders desires and preferences
w99 6/1 p. 19 Appreciating the "Gifts in Men"What about the wives of the elders? Do they not also deserve our consideration? After all, they are sharing their husbands with the congregation. This often calls for sacrifices on their part. Occasionally, elders must spend evening hours caring for congregation matters when they could otherwise be spending time with their families. In many congregations faithful Christian women are willingly making such sacrifices so that their husbands can care for Jehovah?s sheep.?Compare 2 Corinthians 12:15. Husbands ought to be loving their wives as their own bodiesHow have elders and the WTS handled physical abuse by JW husbands in your area?
In spite of what appears in print, women are encouraged to stay with the abuser because she might turn her around to God, that she and the children will suffer financially if she leaves, that it will bring reproach on God and the congregation if she leaves. The WTS uses the phrase "extreme physical abuse." What does that mean being hit once a week, rather than once a day? Hmmmm?
Paragraph 5 5 Godly wives look to the Christian congregation as a model. When Jesus was on the earth, his followers gladly abandoned their previous pursuits and followed him. After his death, they continued subject to him, and over the past nearly 2,000 years, the true Christian congregation has remained subject to Jesus and followed his leadership in all things. Christian wives similarly do not disdain their husbands or seek to downplay the Scriptural arrangement of headship in marriage. Instead, they support and are submissive to their husbands, cooperate with them and thus encourage them. When both husband and wife act in such a loving way, their marriage will succeed and both will find joy in the relationship.Godly wives
JW wives
Christian congregation
Anointed JWs only
Abandoned previous pursuits
Wives must drop all previous pursuits
Past 2,000 years, the true Christian congregation
And who was that; what group from 100 to 1879 was considered the true Christian congregation?
Downplay, disdain, submissive, cooperate, encourage
Sounds like women will never have more than a supporting role on earth.
Continue Dwelling With Them
Paragraph 6
6 The apostle Peter also had counsel for married couples, and his words to husbands were especially pointed. He said: "Continue dwelling in like manner with [your wives] according to knowledge, assigning them honor as to a weaker vessel, the feminine one, since you are also heirs with them of the undeserved favor of life, in order for your prayers not to be hindered." (1 Peter 3:7) The seriousness of Peter's counsel is seen in the final words of that verse. If a husband fails to honor his wife, his relationship with Jehovah will be affected. His prayers will be hindered. Apostle Peter was married (Bible says he had a mother-in-law), Paul wasn?t although some surmise he was a widower. (Priests were not forbidden to marry until around 1200 AD.)HonorHave you ever notice how often in the Bible, women are nameless, but men?s names are listed for generations?
A rag and a bone and a hank of hair?
"a stack of bones and a hank of hair." (September 15, 1941 WT, page 287)
In 1941, at a convention in St. Louis, Missouri, J. F. Rutherford, Russell's successor, combining evangelistic fervor with vaudevillean flair, said that a woman was nothing more than (as Kipling had put it) "a rag and a bone and a hank of hair." (The women in the convention audience, I am told, applauded fervently.)http://www.exjws.net/visions5.htm
Weaker vessel w51 5/1 p. 279 Making a Success of Marriage You husbands, look upon your wives as if they were delicate instruments, finely balanced, and give them the same gentle treatment you give the delicate organs of your own body. Showing love and tenderness is not displaying masculine weakness, nor is it showing reverence. Perish the thought! "Assigning them honor as to a weaker vessel" has nothing to do with the wrongful practice of setting women above men on a pedestal of worship. Menstruation w51 5/1 p. 279 Making a Success of Marriage ***Ah, yes, live with your wife according to knowledge of God?s commands and with understanding of his fundamental laws of nature. Consider the biological constitution of the female, her limitations, her cycles, her vicissitudes, which greatly affect her mental processes, disposition and temperament. God does not overlook these feminine restrictions; neither should husbands. (Lev. 18:19; 20:18)w60 12/1 p. 719 Married Believers Called to Peace and Salvation ***If a husband honors his wife as a physically weaker vessel because of being a feminine vessel, he will handle her with care and tenderness, that she may be of continuous valuable usefulness to him. He will not want to crack her or break her to pieces and destroy her precious helpfulness to him.w70 1/15 p. 36 What Kind of Husband Are You? ***The right kind of husband also considers his wife?s emotional makeup. As the "weaker vessel" she has her physical cycles, which make her more emotionally inclined than her husband.w80 4/15 p. 22 ?A Love As Strong As Death? ***By taking into consideration her physical and biological limitations, as did Jehovah in the Law given to Israel, the Christian husband will act "according to knowledge," assigning his wife "honor as to a weaker vessel, the feminine one."?Lev. 18:19; 20:18; 1 Pet. 3:7.w89 5/15 p. 13 Showing Love and Respect as a Husband ***Why is the wife "of a more delicate constitution"? Among other things, because of her gift of procreation. Her procreative life is subject to monthly cycles that include a period of several days when she might be feeling somewhat limited or under strain. If the husband fails to take this into account and makes the same demands on his wife every day of the month, he will fail to respect her dignity. In that case he will be showing that he lives with her in accordance with selfish ignorance, rather than with knowledge.?Leviticus 18:19; 1 Corinthians 7:5.Feminine oneDid you know that the WTS once taught that Adam had feminine qualities that were taken from him and given to Eve?
w56 9/1 pp. 531-532 The Divine Origin of Marriage ***When God took the male and female characteristics or qualities that were combined in balance in the original Adam and divided them between the sexes he did not mean to start any battle of the sexes in the paradise of Eden. He did not mean to start any competitive coexistence between the sexes. Though the man Adam had the feminine properties divided from him and embodied in his wife, he was still left perfect; he was still in God?s image and likeness. Eve, with the female characteristics controlling in her, was likewise perfect, but she was one flesh with Adam.If men and women are created in God?s image, that would mean God has both feminine and masculine traits.
HeirsChristians, both men and women, had the same hope of ruling as kings and priests in heaven with Christ. If qualified for such a future responsibility, why are women second class citizens on earth?
Prayers hinderedGod may not listen to his prayers but that will not stop elders from calling on an abusive husband/father to pray in the congregation.
Relationship with God will be affected not Christ?Remember when asked what religion they are, most members of the WTS will respond, Jehovah?s Witnesses, not Christian.
Blurb page 17: Unlike Roman law, Christian teachings required a husband to honor his wife Paragraph 7 7 How, then, can husbands assign honor to their wives? To honor one's wife means to treat her lovingly, with respect and dignity. Such kindly treatment of a wife would have seemed novel to many. A Greek scholar writes: "Under Roman law a woman had no rights. In law she remained for ever a child. ... She was entirely subject to her husband, and completely at his mercy." What a contrast to Christian teachings! The Christian husband honored his wife. His dealings with her were governed by Christian principles, not by personal whim. Moreover, he was considerate of her "according to knowledge," taking into account that she was a weaker vessel.Greek scholar: Scottish theologian. William Barclay
"In every sphere of ancient civilization, women had no rights at all. Under Jewish law a woman was a thing; she was owned by her husband in exactly the same way as he owned his sheep and his goats; on no account could she leave him, although he could dismiss her at any moment. . . . In Greek civilization the duty of the woman was "to remain indoors and to be obedient to her husband." It was the sign of a good woman that she must see as little, hear as little, and ask as little as possible. She had no kind of independent existence and no kind of mind of her own, and her husband could divorce her almost at caprice, so long as he returned her dowry. Under Roman law a woman had no rights. In law she remained forever a child. When she was under her father she was under the . . . father?s power, which gave the father even the right of life and death over her; and when she married she passed equally into the power of her husband. She was entirely subject to her husband, and completely at his mercy. Cato the Censor, the typical ancient Roman, wrote: ?If you were to catch your wife in an act of infidelity, you can kill her with impunity without a trial.? Roman matrons were prohibited from drinking wine, and Egnatius beat his wife to death when he found her doing so. Sulpicius Gallus dismissed his wife because she had once appeared in the streets without a veil. Antistius Vetus divorced his wife because he saw her secretly speaking to a freed woman in public. Publius Sempronius Sophus divorced his wife because once she went to the public games. The whole attitude of ancient civilization was that no woman could dare to take any decision for herself."William Barclay, The Letters of James and Peter, (Philadelphia: The Westminster Press, 1960), 258-259.(reference 15 in this document)
http://www.biblicaltheism.com/0402christianityimproves.htm
"A Weaker Vessel" in What Way?Paragraph 8 8 In saying that the woman is "a weaker vessel," Peter did not mean that women are weaker than men intellectually or spiritually. True, many Christian men have privileges in the congregation that women do not expect to have, and in the family women are subject to their husbands. (1 Corinthians 14: 35; 1 Timothy 2:12) Nevertheless, the same faith, endurance, and high moral standards are required of all, men and women. And as Peter said, both husband and wife are "heirs ... of the undeserved favor of life." As far as salvation is concerned, they have equal standing before Jehovah God. (Galatians 3: 28) Peter was writing to anointed Christians of the first century. Hence, his words reminded Christian husbands that as "joint heirs with Christ," they and their wives had the same heavenly hope. (Romans 8:17) One day, both would serve as priests and kings in God's heavenly Kingdom!?Revelation 5:10. Not weaker than men intellectually or spirituallyExcept when they are in the midst of their menstrual cycle! (see quotes above)
Men have privileges women do not expect to haveSuch as handling the microphones
Timing the talks for the school overseer
w64 5/1 p. 260 Modesty Is for Everyone ***Likewise, modesty is becoming to womankind. We cannot escape the Scriptural dictum that ?the feminine vessel is the weaker one.? Her being willing to ?play second fiddle? will make for contentment and happiness in the home. But failing to admit this truth to herself can only result in frustration and unhappiness, to her spouse and to herself.?1 Pet. 3:7. Both would serve as priests and kings in God?s heavenly KingdomBut women will never be kings on earth although having the same faith, endurance and high moral standards
Why qualified for heavenly kingship but not earthly?
Blurb page 18: Both men and women of the "great crowd" look forward to everlasting life in Paradise (CARROT)Paragraph 99 Anointed Christian wives were in no way inferior to their anointed Christian husbands. And in principle, the same is true of those with an earthly hope. Both men and women of the "great crowd" wash their robes and make them white in the blood of the Lamb. Both men and women share "day and night" in the worldwide shout of praise to Jehovah. (Revelation 7:9, 10, 14, 15) Both men and women look forward to enjoying "the glorious freedom of the children of God," when they will delight in "the real life." (Romans 8:21; 1 Timothy 6:19) Whether of the anointed or of the other sheep, all Christians serve Jehovah together as "one flock" under "one shepherd." (John 10:16) What a compelling reason for a Christian husband and wife to show due honor to each other! Anointed Christian wives were in no way inferior to their anointed Christian husbands.
Yet a barely qualified baptized boy will be used to handle microphones.
In principle the same is true of those with an earthly hope.In principle because the NT talks only of Christians going to heaven.
Look forwardThe WTS teaches that the great crowd and/or other sheep do not become the children of God until they pass the test at the end of the 1,000 year reign. They are not adopted as children based on Christ?s sacrifice as the anointed are. Hmmm.
Paragraph 10 10 In what way, then, are women 'weaker vessels'? Perhaps Peter was referring to the fact that, on average, women are smaller and have less physical strength than men. In addition, in our imperfect state, the wonderful privilege of bearing children exacts a physical toll. Women of childbearing age may be subject to physical discomforts on a regular basis. They certainly need special care and consideration when experiencing such discomforts or enduring the exhausting trials of being pregnant and giving birth. A husband who assigns honor to his wife, recognizing the support that she needs, will contribute greatly to the success of the marriage. Weaker vesselHave less physical strength
Bearing children exacts a physical tollWomen of childbearing age may be subject to physical discomforts on a regular basisAnother way of saying that the woman?s menstrual cycle renders her helpless; the same reasoning from the WTS for the last 50 years (see quotes above).
Special care and consideration when experiencing such discomfortsProbably the only way that some women can get special care and consideration from their husbands.
Does this mean women could be qualified to be elders once they pass menopause?In a Religiously Divided Household Paragraph 1111 What, though, if marriage mates have different religious views because one of them accepted Christian truth some time after they got married and the other did not? Can such a marriage succeed? The experience of many says yes. A husband and wife with different religious views can still have a successful marriage in the sense that it can be enduring and bring happiness to both. Besides, the marriage is still valid in Jehovah's eyes; they are still "one flesh." Therefore, Christian spouses are counseled to stay with the unbelieving partner if that partner is agreeable. If there are children, they benefit from the faithfulness of the Christian parent.?1 Corinthians 7: 12-14. Marriage mates have different religious viewsNote how they make sure that you know that a JW did not marry a non-JW.
This also implies that even if the other mate says they are a Christian that if they are not a JW, they are not a Christian.
Christian truthWatchtower truth
It can be enduring and bring happinessBut remember the non-JW is a walking corpse according to the WT representative.
Paragraph 12 12 Peter addresses kindly words of counsel to Christian women living in religiously divided households. His words can also be applied in principle by Christian husbands in the same situation. Peter writes: "You wives, be in subjection to your own husbands, in order that, if any are not obedient to the word, they may be won without a word through the conduct of their wives, because of having been eyewitnesses of your chaste conduct together with deep respect."?1 Peter 3:1, 2. Christian womenJW women
Religiously divided householdsEven if the non-JW spouse is a Christian
Can also be applied in principle by Christian (JW) husbands in the same situationIn principle because a JW without a non-JW wife is rarely discussed in the WT publications. Mostly because women are more often contacted and brought into the WT organization rather than men.
Paragraph 13 13 If a wife can tactfully explain her faith to her husband, that is fine. What, though, if he does not want to listen? That is his choice. Still, all is not lost, since Christian conduct also gives a powerful witness. Many husbands who at first were not interested in or who were even opposed to the faith of their wives became "rightly disposed for everlasting life" after seeing the fine conduct of their wives. (Acts 13:48) Even if a husband does not accept Christian truth, he may still be favorably impressed by the conduct of his wife, with good results for the marriage. One husband whose wife is one of Jehovah's Witnesses admitted that he could never live up to their high standards. Still, he called himself "the happy husband of a charming wife" and warmly praised his wife and her fellow Witnesses in a letter to a newspaper. Does not want to listen? That is his choiceBut it does mean that he is a corpse, and that she will be kissing a corpse as one district overseer pointed out at a recent assembly.
Christian truthWT truth
Happy husband of a charming wifeWhat newspaper? If it was published in a public newspaper, why not provide the name of the paper?
This is really quoting from something previous in the WT.
w99 9/1 p. 32 "Happy Husband of a Charming WifeOCCASIONALLY, some people pointedly accuse Jehovah?s Witnesses of breaking up marriages. However, numerous successful marriages where only one spouse is one of Jehovah?s Witnesses show this to be far from the truth. Taking heed of the Bible?s counsel in family life makes for happy marriages, as the following letter published in a French newspaper shows"For almost 28 years now, I?ve been the happy husband of a charming wife who is one of Jehovah?s Witnesses. She raised my five children, of whom two were not her own, with equal care and much love. Being at the present time a company director with 45 employees, I can assure you that she has contributed greatly to my professional success. That is why when I saw an article in my regular newspaper presenting Jehovah?s Witnesses as a threat to the Lot-et-Garonne region, I decided to provide you with an authoritative testimony."
The letter also says: "They do not smoke or get drunk. Is this a threat? They are tolerant Christians who do not impose on anybody the rules that they follow. Rather, they are an example in many areas. . . . They are not involved in financial scandals or in drug trafficking. They do not take a vow of chastity, and I can assure you, they live normal lives. . . .
"You may well ask me: So why aren?t you yourself one of Jehovah?s Witnesses? Because Christian faith and strict morals are needed, and these are not easily found among common mortals." Paragraph 14 14 Christian husbands who have applied the principles of Peter's words have likewise won their wives over by their conduct. Unbelieving wives have seen their husbands gain a sense of responsibility, ceasing to waste money on smoking, drinking, and gambling and no longer using abusive language. Some of those mates have met other members of the Christian congregation. They were impressed with the loving Christian brotherhood, and what they observed among the brothers drew them to Jehovah. -John 13:34, 35. Christian (JW) husbands
Now is their opportunity to be counseled by the WTS.
Ceasing to waste moneyBelieving JW husbands can find many new ways besides smoking and gambling to waste their on. Are JW husbands less likely to waste their money on drinking?
No longer using abusive languageI have heard brothers cuss out their wives and children, brothers on quick builds, and even at Bethel
"The Secret Person of the Heart" Paragraph 1515 What kind of conduct might win over a husband? Really, it is conduct that is naturally cultivated by Christian women. Peter says: "Do not let your adornment be that of the external braiding of the hair and of the putting on of gold ornaments or the wearing of outer garments, but let it be the secret person of the heart in the incorruptible apparel of the quiet and mild spirit, which is of great value in the eyes of God. For so, too, formerly the holy women who were hoping in God used to adorn themselves, subjecting themselves to their own husbands, as Sarah used to obey Abraham, calling him 'lord.' And you have become her children, provided you keep on doing good and not fearing any cause for terror."?1 Peter 3:3-6. What kind of conduct might win over
Not outward adornment: Obviously Peter never attended an assembly or a convention of JWs where the single women and girls are decked out and between sessions they walk the hallways, trolling, as my husband called it.
Paragraph 16 16 Peter counsels a Christian woman not to rely on external appearances. Instead, let her husband discern the effect of Bible teachings on her inner person. Let him witness the new personality in operation. Perhaps he will contrast it with the old personality that his wife used to have. (Ephesians 4:22-24) He will surely find her "quiet and mild spirit" refreshing and attractive. Not only is such a spirit pleasing to a husband but it is "of great value in the eyes of God."?Colossians 3:12.Yes, sisters, let the brothers at the assemblies and conventions see your
New personalityParagraph 17 17 Sarah is pointed to as a model, and she is a worthy example for Christian wives whether their husbands are believers or not. Sarah unquestionably viewed Abraham as her head. Even in her heart, she called him her "lord." (Genesis 18:12) Yet, that did not diminish her. She was clearly a spiritually strong woman with her own firm faith in Jehovah. Indeed, she is part of the "great cloud of witnesses" whose example of faith should move us to "run with endurance the race that is set before us." (Hebrews 11:11; 12:1) It is not demeaning for a Christian wife to be like Sarah.Blurb page 20: Sarah viewed Abraham as her lord Sarah a worthy examples for Christian wivesWhy an OT example, not Mary or Priscilla or Eunice?
Even in her heart she called him her "lord"Is it because the Bible speaks of hear calling Abraham lord in her heart? Do you see that in this article about marriage how the emphasis is on the woman and not the man in making a marriage be happy?
Paragraph 18 18 In a religiously divided household, the husband is still the head. If he is the believer, he will be considerate of his wife's beliefs while not compromising his own faith. If the wife is the believer, she too will not compromise her faith. (Acts 5:29) Still, she will not challenge her husband's headship. She will honor his position and remain under "the law of her husband."?Romans 7:2. Religiously dividedEven if the non-JW mate is a Christian
Husband is still the headShe will not challenge her husband?s headship
Even if he abuses her and the children
The Bible's Wise Guidance Paragraph 1919 Today, many things can strain the marriage bond. Some men fail to assume their responsibilities. Some women refuse to accept the headship of their husbands. In some marriages, one spouse is abused by the other. For Christians, economic stresses, human imperfection, and the spirit of the world with its immorality and distorted sense of values can test loyalties. Still, Christian men and women who follow Bible principles, whatever their situation, receive Jehovah's blessing. Even if only one partner in a marriage applies Bible principles, things are better than if neither did. Moreover, Jehovah loves and supports his servants who remain faithful to their marriage vows even in difficult situations. He does not forget their loyalty-Psalm 18:25; Hebrews 6:10; 1 Peter 3:12. Some men fail to assume their responsibilities
As the WTS says in other places, because the wife runs ahead and usurps his headship.
One spouse is abused by the otherDid you know that the WTS tries to say that men are just as abused by their wives?
Even if only one partnerThings are better than if neither did
Jehovah loves and supports his servants who remain faithful to their marriage vows even in difficult situations
So if your husband is abusive and unfaithful, the WTS says if you stay with him things will be better than if you left.
Paragraph 20 20 After counseling married men and women, the apostle Peter concluded with warm words of encouragement. He said: "Finally, all of you be like-minded, showing fellow feeling, having brotherly affection, tenderly compassionate, humble in mind, not paying back injury for injury or reviling for reviling, but, to the contrary, bestowing a blessing, because you were called to this course, so that you might inherit a blessing." (1 Peter 3:8, 9) Wise counsel indeed for all, especially for married couples! Showing fellow feelingHaving brotherly affection
Not paying back injury for injury
Bestowing a blessing
Good counsel if applied.
Concluding Comments
I think the title of this article should be changed to:
WISE GUIDANCE FOR MARRIED JW WOMEN WITH JW HUSBANDS AND NON-JW HUSBANDS WHOSE HUSBANDS AREN?T LORD IN THEIR HEARTSOR
BAD MARRIAGES ARE CAUSED BY NONSUBMISSIVE JW WIVESOR
WOMEN ARE WEAK AND UNRELIABLE BECAUSE THEY HAVE MENSTRUAL CYCLESLove, Blondie
Questions
1. What is the correct view of marriage?
2. (a) What help is available to married couples? (b) Why is it important to strive to make a success of marriage?
3. (a) Summarize Paul's counsel to married couples, (b) What fine example did Jesus set?
4. How can husbands follow Jesus' example?
5. How can wives imitate the Christian congregation?
6. What counsel did Peter give to husbands, and why is it important?
7. How should a husband honor his wife?
8, 9. In what ways are women equal to men?
10. In what sense are women 'weaker vessels'?
11. In what sense can a marriage succeed even if husband and wife are of different religions?
12, 13. Following Peter's counsel, how can Christian wives help unbelieving husbands?
14. How can husbands help unbelieving wives?
15, 16. What kind of conduct by a Christian wife might win over an unbelieving husband?
17. How is Sarah a fine example for Christian wives?
18. What principles should be borne in mind in a divided household?
19. What are some pressures that strain marriage bonds, but how can such pressures be resisted?
20. What counsel does Peter have for all Christians?
Do You Recall?How do Christian husbands imitate Jesus?How do Christian wives imitate the congregation?
In what way can husbands honor their wives?
What is the best course for a Christian wife whose husband is not a believer?