left out in the cold

donald

hello im new to this...my wife and i are still baptized....but weve not gone to meetings regulary...for some time now...even though we still go to the memorial.....and we are wondering if to go back.....here without being too specfic is our story

i was rasied in the truth...she was not...she got baptized...about 3 years after we were married..i was made a M.S. in 1990...but becuse of personal reasons i stepped down shortly after..i conecentrated on raiseing my family..and had to work 2 jobs to support them......3 children.....then a few years later my wife left me for some one else...and then i got very sick...and was told my kidney was failing....a elder came to my house and told me that if there was anything i neede that all i had to do was ask...well...a few weeks later i asked this elder...if he could get a couple of young brothers to hep me get rid off some boxes of stuff my wufe had left behind..because i could not lift them...he told me in a reproachful tone...get your family to help you...this after he had told me weeks before...to ask him for help........i thought at the time its no big deal....but then something else happen to call into question all about JW

my x wife fell on hard times and to help her out (after all she was and still is the mother of my kids} i let her move back in to the house..while i moved into my travel trailer some miles a way while she got back on her feet.....when she did...i moved back into my house and she got a new place to live...the elders came to see me and question what i had done.....i told them i thought this was a act of kindness...and also informed them that no wrong doing was done......they did not belive me but because a another elder had seen me living in the trailer...the could not dishfellowship me........during this time my wife and i started talking about maybe getting back together(by the way she was disfellowshipped),,,,,and i was told if i remarried my wife i would be Disfellowshiped....now i had been thaugt that forgiving ones mate was to be encouraged...and that a marrige was to be put back together....and a couple of former elders told me that if they were sereving that it was not a D.S> offense..........so right there i saw two forms of thought.......but any way...i waited for my wife to be reinstated....and then we got remarried...................in this mean time my kids had a life of ther own ...away from the truth.......when i asked the elders to call on them too see if they might come back...they refused too.....telling me that it was my problem...............also without going into detail....they made my father step down as an elder even though he did NOTHING wrong...was never under a committee.....and has served the WTS for 45 years ans gave jobs and money to many brothers........and the brother who treid to out him was later DS...........then there is my brother...when he became a fireman for a job...the elders told him that he could be DS for that.............there many more things i could tell you about my case and other things i know....but time and space does not allow it....lets just say right now i dont know what to think...or do.......im really depressed over this and with me being on dialsys..i just have lost all hop.....i thank jehovah that my wife is ther for me now....and so are my children......i any one has any thoughts or comments or encourgment ill be happy to listen...thanks for you r time......donald

candidlynuts

as a lifetime jw you know the scripture " by their fruit you will know them"

so many cases of unloving congregations and elders show the jw's do not have gods blessing anymore ( i'm a minority i think at one time they did)

the wtbs apostasized itself from god a while back by joining the UN, by allowing brothers to die in malawi while letting the brothers in mexico get their political cards by bribary.

many many things point to the wtbs no longer having gods blessing.

that said, god does not change.. he 's a loving god that reads our hearts. dont beat yourself up for living yoru life the best way you could. your feeling bad for letting MEN down.. not for letting God down.

hugs and welcome.

Sirona

Hi Donald,

Welcome to the forum.

You've been through so much. I suppose all I can suggest is that you research the Jehovahs Witnesses online and learn all about the things they are saying to you. There are Christian groups out there who will offer you loving support instead of making your life so hard.

Just because you don't attend meetings doesn't mean you are not spiritual. You can still have a relationship with God even if you don't go to the Kingdom hall. I hope you and your ex are happy. I also divorced and remarried my ex. and we're really happy now.

Love

Sirona

jgnat

When I read your story, I see two. One story is a drama of courage and conviction. I am so proud of you and your wife that you were able to overcome your differences. You two are a living example of forgiveness and love. Jesus would be so proud. If you doubt me, get a red-letter bible, and read the words of Jesus alone. I am betting you will be encouraged. I also want to give you a good-news story about failed kidneys and dialysis. My mother has been on dialysis for over ten years. Things were getting critical as they were losing viable sites to put the shunt. My mother also had complicating medical issues that prohibited her from being put on the transplant list. She also has a very rare blood type. My mom was able to overcome those other health issues, and a month ago received her kidney transplant. Within a week she was well enough to return home! My mother is in her sixties, and now she has many more healthy years ahead of her. Funny, I am betting she will be missing the dialysis unit. They become a family of sorts.

The other story is about rejection and coldness. The elders treated you very badly, blamed you for the supposed "failings" in your life, and nearly destroyed a God-instituted marriage. Like the Pharisees on the road, they did not dirty themselves with mere "helps", but left it to the "worldly" folk to bind your wounds and take you to the inn. Shame, shame.

I think you are a Christian. Now you just have to find out what kind of Christian you can be away from the society. I am betting you are a very good one.

upside/down

Hang in there bro!

And hang around here.... there is HOPE....but first you need to learn a few things like I did and JWD is a great place to start.

u/d (of the I feel your pain class)

GetBusyLiving

Donald I really wish you the best, your story was sad and very typical. You should really get a copy of CoC to help set your mind at ease.

GBL

vitty

Dont rush into anything. you should read posts in the "best of" section on this site.

It gives lots of information. You are not alone unfortunatly in your experiences, and this is the place where you truly will get help and support without judging.

And a big welcolme to you

LittleToe

Welcome to the board.
It certainly sounds like you've seen your share of idiosyncracies.
I take it, from your name, that you have Scottish roots.
Ceud mile failte.

Eyebrow2

Man, that congregation is full of boobs for elders.

First of all...you cannot be df for being a fireman. In the congregation I grew up in there was an asst fire chief ELDER, and there was another brother that was a fire man and paramedic.

How dare they tell you that you could be DF for remarrying her??? I have never heard that. I guess if she cheated on you, you were scriptually free in their eyes to remarry. But, you would think that they would rejoice, looking it as an opportunity for her to come back to the KH at some point. At the very least, they could have asked you if you had considered waiting to see if she would be reinstated or something to that effect. (not that I would wait either, if I truly loved her)

All I can is that you are okay with the beliefs of the Witnesses, than maybe you just need to find a new congregation where the elders are not a bunch of bone heads. BUT, if you question the teachings, that is another story altogether.

That is just my opinion. I left about 7 years ago because I didn't feel it was the truth any longer. If I did, I would have been able to put up with my congregation's imperfections, as they did my own.

Honesty

Welcome Donald!!!

There were some JW NYC firefighters who died on September 11. One was an elder. The WTS is so screwed up on their frigging idea of unity that each KH has its own set of Bull Shit rules.

Keep reading and you may telephone the elders like some of us did and telling them the Governing Body of JW's are apostate bastards.

left out in the cold

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