Well I am no longer one of Jehovah's witnesses.
I had fully intentioned to disassociate myself from the platform today, but I decided that if I wanted a chance to save my marriage that I'd better tell my wife. She immediately went to to one of the elders.
He just left, asking all of the questions you'd expect. 'Where will you go'? Telling me I'm full of myself. Asking why I didn't just come to him earlier when he could help. He refused to listen to a word.
I feel fully confident that I've made the right decision. I know the witnesses are not right. Even if they were, I see their God as not a good person. He is one of procedure and wrath. He gives us intelligence but makes it a sin to use it. So be it.
The elder was the one I was closest to. He was heart broken that I did not come to him. He was right in calling me a hypocrite for going so long in something I don't believe in.
I only wish they would see. I only wish that their minds would not be closed to anything but what the Watchtower says. I feel empty for the moment, but I know it will get better.
I will now go and visit my mom. She deserves to be told face to face by me first.
If you are a lurker, or thinking about leaving, do not delay. It will be better, I promise.
The writer Frank Yerby once said that maturity is reached the day we no longer need to be lied to about anything.
I know this will be a hard row to hoe, but hey thats what growth is about. Truth is not always a comfortable thing. Children would rather hear things that make them feel good regardless of whether or not it is true. When we grow up we realize that life is about change and growth. With growth sometimes comes pain.
Thank you to everyone, especially the ones who knew what I was planning and helped with word of comfort and advice. Thank you all for your help staying sane over the past few months.
Matt
(growth pain class)