If the elders are going to go for a confrontation, take control and write them up for being mean and unchristian.
Elders of the XXXXXX Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses
Dear Brothers ,
Due to your unloving behavior observed by two witnesses, and because of the confirmed compromises and worldly associations of the Watch Tower Society, I am disassociating you until you make amends to me and my family personally. I am disassociating the Watch Tower Society until they confess and make amends publicly.
Please contact me when you wish to discuss steps to seek reinstatement.
Sincerely,
Send them the letter by registered mail and publish it in the local daily paper. IF they ever make contact, JUST make their repentance the ONLY topic. Name elders in the letter is better. Take control! Stand up to these people. They hate publicity. Take your fights with them public. If your relatives shun you, be glad to be rid of them.