I told my mother the same thing when I met the man I was married to for 32 years......."It's only dinner and besides he's really interested in the truth" he liked me because I was moral and didn't jump right into bed with him....the congregation put me through hell because I dated him (with one of my younger brothers as a chaperone) and eventually married him. Things were marginally okay until after we had our son and at that point I started to fade. There was always something missing in our marriage, I don't know if I blamed him deep down inside or not....I know I tried to be the "perfect" wife and I really think he couldn't handle it. We divorced in February after 32 years of marriage, 19+ of which we spent seperated!
I'd like to tell you that it would probably work out...but I have to agree with Undercover and OutoftheBox, run do not walk away from this relationship right now when it's in the Lust stage. Your heart will only be bruised and not broken.
No out of the box you did not offend me, after all I did ask for you to be as constructive as possible. Out of the box said you were concerned that I wasn’t sure what love is yet. And you are right. I don’t. All I know is that I have never felt this way about anyone before. This might be just a cruel lust like feeling I have then again it might not. I am going to take your advice, and Etude’s and practically everyone else’s advice and just think about this, take things slowly and not do anything rash.
By the way in my first post I said “After meeting”, this a colloquial term in my area for dating.
My father converted to JWs from Roman Catholicism when I was only about 5. My mother didn't for a very long time. Its unbelievable how much of a negative impact the intolerance of the JW belief system has had on their marriage. My mother didn't leave him because of her insane sense of duty and commitment (I write that with alot of admiration). It was a depressing and stifling hell for her and for us children.
If you have any more questions just post away. Take care.
I was trying to ask how long you knew this young man and how long you were dating him before you realized to ask if this was a good thing. And someone asked if you had done the 'dirty deed' with him yet. I was trying to get you to see this as an observer and not respond from insde the 'stary glare' that young lovers can have.
I am so happy that you are willing to 'slow down' and think. That tells me that you are intelligent and there is hope for you after all! ha ha! No one has the right to tell you what to do, but the fact that you asked for advice, and then picked the hardest ones given to try, and are willing to do something constructive and be cautious means that you do have some love & respect for yourself and you will take better care of your own feelings and life as you grow older, you are learning well. If you wait until that confidence grows and you KNOW WHO YOU are, then and only then will you find the RIGHT mate that shares your ideals. Don't settle for one that wants a 'dutiful' wife! Find one who wants a partner and mate with plenty of love & respect to last. A husband should love and respect you as much as you love and respect yourself. Wait for Mr. Right, don't take "Mr. Right now"! You deserve the best!
