RC is stricters that JWs? boy are there going to be problems..
I noticed that too........
DL76
Relationship??
by penton 33 Replies latest jw experiences
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Dragonlady76
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M.J.
Out of any religion yours is the one who he is constantly trained to despise with his whole being. To him it is an agent of Satan and the Antichrist. If you have kids he'll approach their exposure to your religion from that mindset. I know. I am a churchgoing Christian married to a JW with young kids.
Here's a recent thread similar to yours (there's about one like it every other week or so):
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penton
Thank you all for your honesty and your opinions. I have since called round to
him and had a teary-eyed discussion with him. I asked him for an honest
opinion on our relationship. Later on after him saying how he thought we were
going strong, he eventually told me he had been getting a lot of hassle from his
JW community. He told me that he thought I would convert after a discussion I
had started. I had asked him about the difference in his religion and mine.
I could almost understand everything except for them not believing in the holy
trinity (hey it’s not for everyone) and the fact about them not accepting blood transfusions. All in all I had been respectful, I even kept in mind the times of his meetings if I wanted to have a night out on the town. Yes he drinks, looking back
he did keep an eye on how much I was taking. We’ve decided to keep a cool on the relationship and just meet up as friends for the time being. He has since told his mother about our little debate and how he thought he’d convert me as I was showing an “interest”. She came round with some other doll and gave me leaflets and what not.
I suppose I’m thinking straight as I’m upset. I love him or at least I think I do maybe it’s just lusting over someone I can’t have.
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Honesty
Many people need therapy to get over the Dubs, and as you can see lot's of people use resources like these internet forums to help them get over the conditioning. And that's only when they CHOOSE to leave!
Do you really want to be as damaged as some of us are/were because of a so-called christian organisation's doctrines?
If you don't mind psychtherapy to help you realise that not everyone is a satanist or evil; if you don't mind your children being subjected to possible sexual abuse by congregation elders; if you don't mind turning your back on your immediate family when they reject WTBTS doctrine; if you don't mind putting your faith in the WTBTS rather than in Jesus then go ahead and seek a relationship with the JW because chances are very good that you will either be indoctrinated into the cult or your life will be Hell if you don't join them and have children with the JW.
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Doubtfully Yours
Penton,
JWs have very nice qualities that make them seem ideal for a loving and lasting relationship. However, soon the religion will become an issue. The non-JW will have to assimilate the JW's religion in order to keep the peace.
The JW will not be upfront about his/her condition of the other becoming a JW. This is a process that will happen slowly when the mate is already into the relationship wholeheartedly.
It's an entrapment type deal. Proceed with extreme caution.
DY
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Honesty
I could almost understand everything except for them not believing in the holy trinity (hey it’s not for everyone)
That is the difference between Christianity and a cult.All cults deny one or more of the following three-fold Bible truths:
1. Jesus is the Christ- God's promised plan for salvation. He was the Christ when He was born.
2. Jesus was God on earth in human form.
3. Jesus is the only Lord worthy of worship.
I became a Christian and left the JW's because I believe God the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit are One just like the Bible teaches. I also worship Jesus as God just as the early church did.
As a JW I could not voice these beliefs for fear of being disfellowshipped (excommunicated) for apostasy against the religion.
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littlerockguy
It may not matter to you but if you even think you may marry this guy; you will have to be a baptized JW to get married in their congregation. He, as a JW, WILL NOT be allowed to get married in a catholic church, so you guys will have to get married in a civil ceremony unless one of you guys cave in and leave your religion.
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Etude
Penton:
I'm not going to advise you one way or another. However, I can pose some scenarios that may help you decide:
Firstly, along the lines of what ButtLight said, you can ask him if in the future, he would leave you for the Organization if he had to make a choice. That should tell you something. Of course, that depends on his motives for wanting to marry you in the first place. I'm not talking about whether he loves you or not. I'm considering, as you should, what's on his mind. As you've learned here, JWs are strongly discouraged from marrying outside the faith. So, maybe he hopes that he'll bring you in eventually and shed the stigma later on. That's when your marriage can go like a ripe avocado hitting the ground, SPLAT!
On the other hand, his faith may be wavering and he's looking for an excuse to leave or perhaps he doesn't care what happens to him because he cares more about you. Either way, some people experience a lot of guilt when they leave and end up returning. In that case, the first scenario I painted may occur and he may leave you because he needs to get back into the religion and you don't. Here is a good example: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/46758/1.ashx and http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/53595/1.ashx
What you need is what every couple contemplating marriage needs: TALK EVERYTHING OUT FIRST BEFORE GETTING MARRIED. You don't want to wait until you have children. I learned about an interfaith marriage (Christian and Jewish) that made a very good couple and were very happy until they had a child. The issue came up as to what faith they were going to raise the child and the disagreement ended their marriage. I guess each didn't think about it because they assumed that the kid's faith would be their own.
And oh, forgive me if I'm being too forward, but you stated that you're Irish Catholic. Well, I presume that the picture of a good Catholic girl applies to you and you haven't "done the deed" with him. If that were the case, you must realize that he can be expelled from the Organization, it would be announced at the meeting and he would be shunned. That can be devastating for a person unless he or she is ready to go.
Discuss everything. Assume nothing. Know his stake in the relationship. Learn about the JWs so that you can talk to him intelligently.
Etude.
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mustang
This reminds me of the joke about:
"THE MIDDLE MANAGER’S PRAYER:
Sorry, Middle Mangers don’t have a prayer!!!"
But this is not a joke.
In the same light, there are no success stories in the "unevenly yoked", "dating worldly people", "marrying outside the Lord" business.
Constructive as possible? OK: quit right now and cut your losses.
Mustang
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out of the box
penton,
I am confused. How old are you? And how old is the JW boy? Here is your first post:
After meeting a wonderful fella who also is JW. I've never felt this way about anyone before in my life. The only thing is i don't know if its possible for us to have a stable relationship
You mention MEETING a fella. Here is your last post where you say you love him:
I suppose I’m thinking straight as I’m upset. I love him or at least I think I do maybe it’s just lusting over someone I can’t have
I am concerned that you are not sure what love is yet. And you are willing to join a CULT to find out? Please rethink, LEARN TO BE STILL and THINK, don't act, don't DO anything, just think for a while. Sorry if I offended you, but this is SERIOUS business like the other posters are sounding the alarms for you!
out of the box