Watchtower History in Haiku

Leolaia

Watchtower History in Haiku, by Leolaia
Barbour and Russell
What a team, they alone knew
Jesus was present

Too bad they split up
But Russell, he started up
Zion's Watch Tower

The Parousia
Began in '74
The harvest begins

1881
New bodies, resurrection
Oh wait, never mind

In 1914
Anarchy, Armageddon
Just you wait and see

The Great Pyramid
Prophecy, God's stone witness
Now Satan's Bible

Sorry Maria
Jellyfish, Rose Ball, Twain One
But I'm "That Servant"

Pastor Russell says
Millennial Dawn, it's here
Then oops he just died

Finished Mystery
Posthumous, ghost written in
1917

A new president
New bylaws, legal wrangling
Goodbye directors

In 1918
New bodies, churches destroyed
Instead: Year's jail time

Next year, out of jail
Cedar Point, Rutherford says
"Advertise the King"

Millions now living
said the Judge, will never die
Wait till '25

Buy all Russell's books
That's until I write my own
Buy the Harp of God

The ancient worthies
'25, they're here this year
Just any day now

Well, they're not here yet
Build a house, San Diego
Call it Beth Sarim

Of course it's my house
A mansion with Cadillacs
And my dear Bonnie

Judge Rutherford drinks
Pass out drunk, snooze hangover
Wake up with new light

Woodworth's Golden Age
Quackery, new calendars
Ban vaccinations

We need a new name
No longer Bible Students
We're now Witnesses

Hey you Jonadabs
Think you're going to heaven?
Too bad, not for you

Who's the enemy?
Catholics, Big Business, Satan
Yiddish clergymen

Hey Adolf Hitler
my good friend, can we make nice?
We're on the same side

Adolf not impressed
German Witnesses, goodbye
Concentration camps

Won't salute the flag
Not anti-American, just
Pro-theocracy

It's now World War Two
Maybe now, Armageddon
Just months remaining

Blood can save your life
Transfusions thou shalt not take
Eating blood is death

Nathan Homer Knorr
The New World Society
It's really a cult

The Watchtower says
Obey us, Christ directs us
We are your Mother

Secret committee
Hey let's make our own Bible
New World Translation

The Cold War terror
World War Three, nuclear war
God's kingdom ahead

1950s' growth
Amazing! But '60s growth?
Slowed down to a crawl

Armageddon soon!
Freedom in the Sons of God
We must preach, preach, preach

Six thousand years over
In 1975
Millennium dawns

Truth book, sell your home
Stop smoking, study quickly
Get baptized, get saved

Organ transplants ban
Cannibalism is wrong
Too bad if you're dying

It's '75
But Eve came too late
So no New World yet

Knorr dies and guess what?
Governing body is tops
President, small fry

Porneia, disco
Oral sex, The Exorcist
Demons everywhere

Bethel apostates
Franz, Dunlap, Watters and friends
GB kicks them out

Poztates everywhere!
Shun them all, don't say hello
They're all enemies

1986
Year of peace, security
Could it be the end?

Sodom, Gomorrah
Yes they'll be resurrected
Oh wait, maybe not

Cold war is now over
The generation is old
Almost passed away

Don't ask for payment
When you go from door to door
Just contribution

Very wacky book
The Revelation Climax
Extremely cultish

The Oracle's dead
Freddie Franz, our guiding light
Recycle his books

The generation
Is a people, not a time
The end is postponed

Separate sheeps, goats
You thought you were doing it
That is now old light

We must simplify
Too much money being spent here
No more food service

Hello scarlet beast
Can I be your friend, U.N.?
Need library card

The zeal is now gone
Annual increase is so low
U.S. now zero

Hide information
But now there's the internet
Beware of strangers

The two witness rule
Abuse, silent lambs, exposé
Now lawsuits, lawsuits

JWD
Information free of charge
Help, heal, vent, and learn

Legolas

Clapping Hands

AlmostAtheist

Oh... my... god... That was absolutely striking! I'd call it a Tour de force, but I don't know how to spell it.

Absolutely outstanding! Hats off to ya, Leo.

The generation

Is a people, not a time

The end is postponed

LOL!

Dave

BrendaCloutier

Leo hon, that was beautiful, amazing, spot on. Thank you thank you thank you!

Scully

Brilliant!!

Well done!

ackack

Holy CRAP thats amazing. I saulte you!

(one small nit, "In 1917" contains 6 sylabels.

ackack

lawrence

That is excellent! Thanks!

Midget-Sasquatch

Moving, like all good poetry. The ending with JWD was especially nice, hopefully prophetic of the WT's last chapter.

jgnat

WoW

Hondo

Leolaia,

a little long for a true Haiku (Usually three lines, sometimes two and is the shortest form of Japanese poetry constructed normally 5, 7, and 5 syllables in first, second and third lines respectively) but absolutely good job anyway. Great form and flow.

A couple examples of Haiku:

O snail

climb Mount Fuji

with no hurry

Issa

Old pond

a frog leaps in

water's sound

Basho

Below would be my feeble take at putting a true Haiku together:

An evil deception

lives, families, lost

truth discovered, freedom

Hondo

Watchtower History in Haiku

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