by Sparkplug 80 Replies latest social relationships
Well, clenching our ass probably isn't a good method of doing it, unless we're happy to be perpetually constipated
Well, I am not sure that I disagree with you. I am not sure that I even understand the point that you are trying to make.
Hey, does a turtle clench it's ass?
LT, of the "always got a spare roll" classSome of us are very thankful for that.
There's a point?
Danny Hasard said:
Jesus outlined the steps to settle differences and stated "if your brother repents you must forgive him". There lies the key,you cannot grant blanket amnesty (indulgence) to a willful unrepentant perpetrator as they are gonna stab you in the back again first chance they get, and revile you as a dumb ass for letting yourself be suckered.
At some point in the dealings with many individuals, it becomes necessary to keep as much distance as is humanly possible between those who have wronged you. There needs to be placed, a protective buffer zone to keep these same individuals from ever attempting or even being in a position to do you harm again. There are those who feel because I may still hold to some Christian values, that I'm obliged to forgive them for things that have been done to me. These individuals I have bent over backwards to try to help, only to have them turn around and try to have me taken out.
Some individuals are not yet in a position to have forgiveness bestowed upon them because they are psychotic liars, manipulators, and in many instances, just plain evil. Evil must be addressed and dealt with in the strongest possible manner, in my case, it's something that I choose to harbor at this time, that being the anger bitterness and resentment. I cannot allow another intrusion into my life where people feel that it's no big deal to cause physical, emotional or psychological harm to me. In cases of such, I let GOD deal with the person and the situation. I also let GOD deal with me in the manner that he may choose as I know my being unforgiving is something that he may have no approval of, but if that be the case, I'll let GOD handle that.
For my 1000th post here goes.......
I just heard this the other day that,
Forgiveness is the act of giving up the hope that things could have been any different.
Sometimes it's not about accepting the wrongness or the cruelty of those we believed harmed us, it's just about accepting that it happened and nothing we can do in this present moment will change what happened. We have to give up the "what ifs" and the "hope" or wish that it had happened differently. Just accept it as we accept we were born a certain height, a certain race, with a certain hair color. There are some things we can't change, the past is one of them.
Forgiveness is when we accept what we can't change and work towards the things we have control over, which are in the present and in the future.
Dear Robyn,
Perhaps your frustration with forgiveness is that you are presently seeing it as a verb or something you do or don't do. Seeing it in this way all kinds of conditions and questions arise. What Ross and I are attempting to convay is quite different.
Forgiveness would not even arise, there would be no reason to forgive, if a blind person knocked over and broke something. In a like manner, if on inner investigation and inquiry you clearly see how you have been entrenched in a mental fabrication and tenaciously and ignorantly protecting an identity that was not even real, you could then clearly see this exact same entrenchment in others, and there would then be no need for forgiveness and nothing to forgive. They are blind, as you once where...and if anything, their condition motivates compassion and empathy.
The answers to all life's significant questions and dilemmas you already carry within you; and all are solved on discovery of your true Identity, which is the same One, for all people and things. This is why I keep suggesting folks be still and take the time for inner examination and discovery. There is no thing more important. Nothing more life changing.
j
Dear Robyn,Perhaps your frustration with forgiveness is that you are presently seeing it as a verb or something you do or don't do. Seeing it in this way all kinds of conditions and questions arise. What Ross and I are attempting to convay is quite different.
Forgiveness would not even arise, there would be no reason to forgive, if a blind person knocked over and broke something. In a like manner, if on inner investigation and inquiry you clearly see how you have been entrenched in a mental fabrication and tenaciously and ignorantly protecting an identity that was not even real, you could then clearly see this exact same entrenchment in others, and there would then be no need for forgiveness and nothing to forgive. They are blind, as you once where...and if anything, their condition motivates compassion and empathy.
Dear JT, I do not believe that you understood a word that I wrote. Although not as eloquently put, I believe that I stated the same thing you just did.
The answers to all life's significant questions and dilemmas you already carry within you; and all are solved on discovery of your true Identity, which is the same One, for all people and things. This is why I keep suggesting folks be still and take the time for inner examination and discovery. There is no thing more important. Nothing more life changing.
Sorry, but IMO, the above sounds a bit preachy. You are seeming to imply that your way is the only way--the only answer. It almost sounds as if you are saying there is something wrong spiritually with those who do not believe the same as you.
My my...this thread is still up and running. So good. I can come back and let you know I have thought about all I read and I really menat it as an observation when I started this, and now I am the one learning. So many well thought on posts. Thanks.
I think I agree the most with the concept of relaxing. When you find peace with yourself, it usually means you have made peace with many other aspects of life and people. Don't get me wrong. (Some people are perfectly at peace with being worthless; or so they tell themselves) For the most part though, if you have straightened out wrongs and can relax. Then you know you have forgiven and quite often have been forgiven yourself.
The ultimate in forgiveness is when we can forgive people who have never expressed sorrow for the hurt that they have caused us. I'm told that JWs only forgive when there is a high level of repentance. No wonder they are all so screwed up!
They must have so much resentment inside them, I don't know how they can bear it. It must be an awfully unhappy religion.
Christina
I do not believe that you understood a word that I wrote.
Sorry, I gave too much emphasis on your third post in this thread that referred to the doingness of forgiveness several times, and gave little attention to the others. Please forgive me
It almost sounds as if you are saying there is something wrong spiritually with those who do not believe the same as you
Actually, I am feebly attempting to point out that there is nothing wrong with any of us, and that there is a wholeness just below the story. I don't consider it a "belief", as it is something I have actually seen within myself and can see in the eyes of others. It's not a conceptual thing or a fragment of some belief system or religion. That said, I certainly understand how I can come across as preachy, judgmental and sometimes down right offensive and mean. Our dear Ross has pointed similar out to me.
It's as if we are strongly hypnotized and asleep within the story of a broken and fragmented self, and gentle alarm bells and reminders can easily go unnoticed. My teachers, at times, have had to shake me and slap me upside the head repeatedly; not in a physical way, but they left no doubt that this was an extremely serious matter. I am trying to kindly slap people up side the head; and my only message is that you are infinitely more than you believe yourself to be. It's the only reason I'm on this forum.
j
It's the only reason I'm on this forum.
Besides to make an ass of myself.
j
