> So Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
>
> GEORGE W BUSH
>
> We don't really care why the chicken crossed the
> road. We just want to know
> if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
> Our side of the road is
> the right side of the road and the chicken is either
> against us or for us.
> There is no middle ground for any chicken.
>
> COLIN POWELL
>
> Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see
> the satellite image of
> the chicken crossing the road.
>
> DONALD RUMSFELD
>
> I have known about the chicken crossing the road for
> several months. I was
> investigating why the chicken moved but didn't feel
> it was necessary to
> alert anyone.
>
> HANS BLIX
>
> We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we
> have not yet been
> allowed to have access to the other side of the
> road.
>
> JOHN KERRY
>
> Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road I
> am now against it!
>
> RALPH NADER
>
> The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road
> had been polluted by
> unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not
> reach the unspoiled habitat
> on the other side of the road because it was crushed
> by the wheels of a
> gas-guzzling SUV.
>
> PAT BUCHANAN
>
> To steal the job of a decent, hard-working American.
>
> RUSH LIMBAUGH
>
> I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but
> I'll bet it was getting a
> government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet
> that somebody out there is
> already forming a support group to help chickens
> with crossing-the-road
> syndrome. Can you believe this?How much more of this
> can real Americans
> take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their
> tax dollars. And when I
> say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money
> the government took
> from you to build road for chickens to cross.
>
> MARTHA STEWART
>
> No one called me to warn me which way that chicken
> was going. I had a
> standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my
> eggs when the price dropped
> to a certain level. No little bird gave me any
> inside information.
>
> DR SEUSS
>
> Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with
> a toad? Yes, the
> chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've
> not been told.
>
> ERNEST HEMINGWAY
>
> To die in the rain. Alone.
>
> MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR
>
> I envision a world where all chickens will be free
> to cross roads without
> having their motives called into question.
>
> GRANDPA
>
> In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the
> road. Somebody told us
> the chicken crossed the road, and that was good
> enough.
>
> BARBARA WALTERS
>
> Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
> listening to the
> chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming
> story of how it
> experienced a serious case of molting, and went on
> to accomplish its life
> long dream of crossing the road.
>
> JOHN LENNON
>
> Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads
> together -- in peace.
>
> ARISTOTLE
>
> It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
>
> KARL MARX
>
> It was a historic inevitability.
>
> CAPTAIN KIRK
>
> To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.
>
> SIGMOND FREUD
>
> The fact that you are at all concerned that the
> chicken crossed the road
> reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
>
> BILL GATES
>
> I have just witnessed eChicken2004, which will not
> only cross roads, but
> will lay eggs, file your important documents, and
> balance your checkbook...
> and Internet Explorer is an integral part of
> eChicken.
>
> ALBERT EINSTEIN
>
> Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the
> road move beneath the
> chicken?
>
> BILL CLINTON
>
> I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is
> your definition of
> chicken?
>
> AL GORE
>
> That was my chicken! I invented the chicken.
>
> COLONEL SANDERS
>
> Did I miss one?
