Posts by alamb

It started out innocently enough: I began thinking at meetings now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another and soon I was more than just a theocratic thinker. I began to think alone, you know, “to relax,” I told myself, but I knew it wasn’t true.

Thinking became more and more important, and finally I was thinking all the time. I even thought at the Kingdom Hall. I knew thinking and my position in the congregatin didn’t mix, but I couldn’t stop. I began avoiding the friends at lunchtime so I could read Crisis of Conscience and other works that challenged my thought processes. I returned to the Kingdom Hall dizzied and confused, asking, “What exactly are we doing here?”

Things weren’t great at home either. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life guided by the FDS—she spent the night at her mother’s.

I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the PO called me into the back room and said, “Bob, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking is a real problem. If you don’t stop thinking, I’ll have to recommend you be disfellowshipped.” This gave me a lot to think about.

I went home early after my conversation with the elder. “Honey,” I confessed, “I’ve been thinking.”

“I know you’ve been thinking,” she said, “and I want a divorce.”

“But Honey, surely it’s not that serious.”

“It is serious,” she said, lower lip quivering. “You have been a fine window washer all your life and your service to Jehovah comes before the children and I having health insurance or educations.”

“That’s faulty syllogism,” I said impatiently, and she began to cry. I’d had enough. “I’m going to the library to look up what really happened in 607/587,” I snarled and stomped out the door. I headed to the library in the mood for enlightenment, roared into the parking lot, and ran up to the big glass doors—they didn’t open. The library was closed.

To this day I believe Jehovah was looking out for me that night. As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for a computer with an internet connection to feed my starving mind, a magazine caught my eye; a Watchtower left in a laundromat. The words “Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?” stood out in large letters. You may recognize the line: it comes from the standard issue “Thinkers Anonymous” poster.

Today, I am a recovering thinker. I never miss a meeting . At each meeting we listen to a non-educational, self congratulatory public talk. I am again training my mind to be numb. Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my family and things are a lot better at home. Life just got easier, somehow, once I stopped thinking.

Soon, I’ll be able to be an elder again….

Thanks, Bob

20

Help please---69 Awake quote

by blindersoff in

jw
friends

while talking with my mother about why i gave no thought to my future employment as a young man, i mentioned the 69 awake article that assured young folks that they would not grow old in this system.

she thinks i must have misread it.

i can't locate it now, so can anyone point me to it?.

alamb

If you need a scan, I probably have it. That goes for everybody. I have a basement full.

101

JEHOVAH, the greatest child abuser of them all!

by nicolaou in

.

can there be any doubt?

alamb

I read a few years back, and it hit me like a brick, something to the affect that Christianity is based on child sacrifice. Jehovah's way, that is. And he demanded the same mentality from Abraham to prove his faithfulness.

34

USA service report shows a decrease of 1442 publishers

by truthseeker in

jw
friends

from september 2004 to july 2005, there has been no increase in the number of publishers reporting for the 2005 service year, which began last september.

september 2004 - 990,551 .

october 2004 - 993,476 .

alamb

Is this the first year when the minimum time permitted is 15 minutes? That would make matters worse. Lowering the standards and still losing publishers is very telling.

19

Theocratic Warfare: Is It Still Practiced?

by Nate Merit in

i was "in the truth" for about four years and was disfellowshipped thirty-three years ago at the age of nineteen.

when i became involved, at age fifteen, i was taught 'theocratic warfare' which is 'lying for the truth.

' it really didn't bother me until i was several years older and became more introspective.

alamb

Alive and well here.

At my divorce hearing, my ex called in the "City Overseer" locally to testify what a loving arrangement shunning was. My attorney then asked him about the "Custody Brochure" and he denied it existed. Little did he know I had gotten a copy and given it to the judge before the elder came in. He made a fool of himself and he was there to testify for the other side.

My attorney also asked him to read quotes from the literature on shunning, especially the infamous 1952 definition of 'loving arrangements'. He got all flustered and sweaty and wouldn't read quotes even when told to by the judge. He then asked me directly, without addressing my attorney, if I got them of apostate websites. I replied that I had the originals in my library. Like it made a difference.

So, I have this on video and it's going to Randy to be put on an apostate website for all to see what Theocratic War Strategy really looks like. And a copy is going to the Justice Department also, they're waiting for it. The society promotes perjury. Black and white.

Think I'll send a thankyou card with a link to the CO.

9

My XJW Poem

by Junction-Guy in

jw
friends

here is my xjw poem, inspired by a thread from a few days ago.. .

watchtower hypocrisy.

you stand on the corner with your watchtower and awake,.

alamb

Wow. You speak from your heart. That said alot and when it's actually in black and white, it's so disgusting. So glad we're all out.

31

How many here were mistreated by their "elder" fathers?

by hubert in

jw
friends

i am starting to notice some posts about ex-j.w.

's being mistreated, abused, by their fathers who were elders.. i wonder if this is quite common?.

hubert

alamb

Sexually abused for 6 years. He didn't stop. I moved out. He is still emotionally abusive. He now takes it upon himself to shun me...as being unworthy of his love.

22

anyone else write anti J-DUB poetry????

by theinfamousone in

my mom found this one and flipped..... .

benevolently greedy.. ridiculously wise.. unfortunately lucky.. painfully happy.. stupidly smart.. a contradiction in terms;.

blind,.

alamb

He handed me a book

and dared my very being to read

and my hands shook

and my brain cracked

and my heart wept.

And the nightmare

stood before me

and as I watched

the shadows melted

and I saw a reflection of myself

that I had never seen.

And I am grateful for the paper, and the words,

the keys that opened the prison I called truth

and the heart that dared ask me to question.

Thanks Ray.

22

anyone else write anti J-DUB poetry????

by theinfamousone in

my mom found this one and flipped..... .

benevolently greedy.. ridiculously wise.. unfortunately lucky.. painfully happy.. stupidly smart.. a contradiction in terms;.

blind,.

alamb

And here we sit

Fingers saying what our voices cannot

Because we are dead

And our pain isn't allowed to speak

But with these fingers we can touch kindred souls

and if we wait

and listen with our eyes,

friends....

true friends.

Because the masks are gone

and our beauty is our strength.

Hear us roar.