Posts by arachnia

80

What Are Some Of The STUPIDEST Comments Made?

by minimus in

jw
friends

what are some of the stupidest comments made in the watchtower, or by a circuit overseer or elder that you've never forgotten?

the one about" the rapist being human" too, ranks right up there....like we're supposed to feel bad for him?

arachnia

I pioneered my first year out of high school, working part-time to pay my bills. I still lived at home, but my parents held me responsible for my car payment, insurance, gas, clothes, entertainment, basically anything outside of food and shelter. They were basically inactive, attending only a few meetings here and there and were not overly supportive of my pioneering, but didn't actively oppose it either. I ended up having a pre-cancerous growth removed in 1989, fortunately, I was still on my parent's medical insurance until I turned 19 in September. However, at that point I had to seriously evaluate the wisdom of continuing without insurance, so I chose to reduce my pioneering to regular auxillary and work full time in order to get health insurance in case the growth ended up getting worse (fortunately it didn't, but other problems ensued.). Of course, because I was "stepping down" the elders felt they should meet with me, and so I had to meet with our PO (who also happened to be the father of my "big sister" study conductor, so he was quite familiar with my family situation.) and another elder.

The meeting basically consisted of them implying that I must have a guilty conscience because I had started to date a brother two-three months beforehand and perhaps there was something I wanted to confess? I was insulted. In fact, I was considering breaking up with the brother at that time (in hindsight, it would have been better if I had, because we ended up divorcing...but that's another story). I explained the real issue, that I needed health insurance, and why, and the PO told me:

"Lots of pioneers and other brothers and sisters go without health insurance. They have the faith that Jehovah will take care of them through the congregation. What makes you think you won't be cared for?"

Mind you, *he* and his wife had insurance, as did his daughter, who was a pioneer, but lived with her parents and they provided much financially for her. I'll bet he was glad they had that insurance when his wife came down ill many years later, I believe with MS, if I recall correctly.

Hypocrites.

42

Elders? Ministerial servants? Pioneers

by lv4fer in

jw
friends

i'm just curious.

how many of you were elders or ministerial servants or pioneers?

were you an elder or ms or pioneer when you realized it wasn't the truth or a had you stepped down already, were you "weak" when you realized it?

arachnia

I was a regular pioneer in Rochester, MI from Sept 1988 to August 1989. Attended Pioneer School in Clarkston, MI in July 89. I needed health insurance and had to work full time to get it, so I went down to Regular Auxillary for a few months to keep the elders off my back. Got married, had doubts, but my husband (now-ex) was terrified of me expressing any of them so he kept me "in line" for a few years until I couldn't take it any longer and left both the religion and him in 1996.

23

Buffy the Vampire Slayer...

by Robdar in

.

any fans out there?.

robyn

arachnia

Most definitely. :)

39

When to put up Christmas decorations?

by Simon in

jw
friends

.

the kids are very keen on having a christmas tree and some decorations.. is there any date these are supposed to go up or are we going to look really silly having it up mid november ?

arachnia

My husband's family has a tradition that they put up the trees and lights the day after Thanksgiving. (Not sure if that holiday has spread to the UK - kinda ironic if it has. ;>) When hubby moved up here, we went out and bought a tree and ornaments, lights and adopted the same tradition, although sometimes we don't do it right away the day after, but that weekend it all goes up. We look forward to it every year. It was a very liberating feeling when we bought that stuff the first year, as I had only been celebrating Xmas again for the two years prior, my last celebration before that was when I was five before my parents were assimilated by the dubs. To be getting a tree of my own was another reminder that I was free to make my own choices in life. :)

77

HOW LONG WERE YOU A JW?

by hamptonite21 in

jw
friends

93 did the dunk!

99 df'd

arachnia

JW's knocked on my parent's door when I was about two. Mom took the mags. Dad recognized them from his teen years when his mom was a JW. She had been inactive for many years at that point. Being teen parents and not entirely sure they were raising me properly, they accepted a bible study. *sigh*

My last birthday and xmas were in 1975, when I was 5. Mom had a "big sister" type start a weekly study with me at around age 12. Once that was established and the indoctrination process was in full tilt, she and dad started their fade-away.

Got baptized when I was 15 (three months shy of 16) in 1986 at the Silverdome.

My parents used the religion as a weapon against me and a shield for themselves. I'd go to the meetings and hear that there were no excuses for not doing all you can, and if you were found lacking by not attending all the meetings and going out door-to-door, you were gonna be bird food. I'd go home, terrified of what was going to happen to my family, relay to them what was said at the meeting, and was told that I shouldn't be so judgemental, that "Jehovah understands that not everyone can put in the same effort." At another meeting I would be told talk such as that was just Satan trying to inflitrate. And even though my parents were trying to do the slow fade, they kept pushing me towards it and would use it to prohibit me from things they didn't want me to do (extra cirricular sports, dances, dating, etc.: "You know the Society says that is wrong, Trase.).

Pioneered right out of high school for a year. Had major health issues so I dropped down to regular auxillary and was chastised for doing so by an elder who worked for GM and whose daughter had been my study conductor. "Lots of pioneers go without health insurance." I notice he and his family didn't.

Married a newly converted JW to escape my parents. Spent six hellish years with him. Finally reached the conclusion he was either gay or bi and that was one of the reasons he was so hostile towards me. Got divorced and left the JW's in 1996. I understand he left shortly thereafter. He still lives in the same house and neighbors I've seen since have asked me if he might be gay. Heh.

I remarried last year to a wonderful former-Catholic-then-Wiccan-now Atheist guy and life is grand! :)

Sorry this got to be so long. In summary, I was "officially" involved from about 1975 to 1996.

77

HOW LONG WERE YOU A JW?

by hamptonite21 in

jw
friends

93 did the dunk!

99 df'd

arachnia

Edited by - arachnia on 14 November 2002 22:15:12

22

Dr. Phil is a Bozo

by troucul in

sorry i had to say that...all this clown does is recycle common knowledge.

all he is doing is spewing forth common sense.

it's amazing what people will do for money these days.

arachnia

I've only seen him twice, and that's quite enough for me. He was spouting off some tripe to people with addictions: "Well there's something missing in your life that you are trying to fill with >insert their particular addiction here< as if that some sort of freaking revelation to them. Thank you, Captain Obvious! =P

34

So fed up!!!!! New here!

by Shytears in

.

hmm,i dont how too start off,but ill try,so im 16 yrs old,im being raised as a jw,and it is hard as hell,sometimes i think,if this is the right religion arent you suppose to be happy??

?well i really cant do anything about that because my parents say no way they will let me go in "the world" nonsense!so im stuck here ,lonely,depressed,and confused,sometimes i wish id die,but i know that wont help nothing.i want out of this org so bad,but i cant do nothing about it.there always telling me dont let satan and the bad asscioates influence you!im sick of that.all my friends well i shold say my ex friends they never helped me,my as they say:worldy friends did.. also i really really like this guy,i know he like me but he is worldy and i wish so badly i could date him,(i hate the term worldy,so stupid)my parents seriously will not give me space and they are stuck up my @ss.please if u have any commets i would sincerly appriciate it:) laura

arachnia

Hi Shytears,

I'm sorry to hear about your frustration with your current situation - it's quite understandable. Many of us have walked your path and later successfully made it out. I'm going to say some of the same things everyone else has, but hopefully it's helpful to hear some common things emphasized and it will show how important they are. Education is the first thing, make it your top priority. You cannot imagine the doors it opens for you in your life until you see all those that remain closed without it. You will be far happier if you pursue it while you are young and better able to dedicate yourself to it. Youth has the advantages of stamina, enthusiasm, and the ability to absorb information quickly. Ironically, this is why the JW's doggedly pursue their own youths to focus "on the kingdom" - because they recognize the value of the previous statement. It is easier to indoctrinate someone when they are young and a "clean slate" so to say. Learn to utilize critical thinking and logic to evaluate the things you are taught, the things you read, and the things you experience. I have a couple of websites that will help to introduce you to these concepts:
http://www.csicop.org/si/9012/critical-thinking.html
http://www.datanation.com/fallacies/

Also, as difficult as it is at your age, try to keep the focus off of guys and on yourself. Don't get deeply involved with anyone so that the course of your life is forever altered by choosing to pursue a relationship with them. That's not to say that the outcome of dating someone will always have long-lasting consequences, but it certainly can, especially if you have been raised to believe that dating is is a process by which one evaluates another as a marraige prospect. It can eventually lead to that stage, but it should not have such gravity for some time, especially not at your age. Be free and get to know yourself and your needs, your hopes, your dreams, and your desires so that you can better know who will make a good partner to you and you to them. Start a list of qualities you need in a partner, those you want in a partner, and those which are completely unacceptable. Keep the list updated over time, adding and deleting as necessary. Evaluate anyone you start to seriously date against it and see how they measure up. (Of course, don't tell them about this! LOL) ;-) Love and lust make us do some crazy shit, so while you aren't consumed by it with a particular someone, make your list, then check it twice, and then pull it out if you start thinking, "this is the one!" and see how it looks.

Finally, if you leave the religion, you will have to face the reality that your parents may shun you as a consequence. Prepare yourself for the possibility. If it doesn't happen, excellent, but if it does, you will at least be partly prepared. I'm fortunate in that my parents are no longer in the religion either. However, I have had to deal with other shunning (I'm DA'd) and I find that recognizing that it is the other person's CHOICE to do it and not that I am evil (well, OK, sometimes I might be, just a little...) >;)~ does help. To be honest, I'm to the point now where it means so little to me as to not affect me.

You have a tough road ahead, but it's well worth travelling down in order to live your live as a free person. Hang in there and keep your chin up! :)

25

need fluff? Tell some corny church sign sayings

by LyinEyes in

i live in the south , very heavy bible belt.

there is a church on every corner.

they always have a sign out front with some very corny saying.

arachnia

Here's a couple of my favorites:

"The Most Powerful Position is On Your Knees"

"Don't Let Worries Kill You, Let the Church Help."

Photos of both are at:
http://members.fortunecity.com/dflash/id121.htm

And here are some others (text only).

http://www.kudzoojesus.com/HideTheKids.htm

47

LAS VEGAS ANYONE???

by plmkrzy in

jw
friends

.

a few of us will be in vegas in december ( 4th, 5th and 6th) who wants to meet up?

?

arachnia

Hubby and I will be there in another week, actually. He's going for a work seminar being held there and I get to tag along on the company's tab (we just had to pay the airfare). Should be fun!