I've met many people in field service that said they were dubs just be cause they had studied before and liked what they heard. Anyone can claim to be a JW. It doesn't mean anything. Why should I care what Serena does. I'm not a dub anymore and have no reason to get hurt by it.
dubstepped
JoinedPosts by dubstepped
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31
Serena
by Darryl ini was watching serena win yet another wimbledon title recently (congrats to her) but it got me to thinking about her for a moment.
she identifies herself as a jw and if you look up any info on her it will tell you that her religion is jw so that means that she herself and the rest of the world identifies her as a jw.. for those of us who are df'd as well as those of you who are about to be df'd what is the reason?
and what is the main difference between a df and a fade away?
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89
Need advice
by Drwho ini'm a middle aged man.
i dated a jw lady for 3 months ., we never had sex, just made out , half naked , well everything except underwear .
she has been a jw for 40 years ., was married to a jw but he committed adultery 13 years ago so they divorced .
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dubstepped
Fluffing up your ego would do you no good. Telling you that you can change others would be lying to you. You need reality to move on with your life. I told you the truth. You may not like it, and it may sting, but most of us woke up because we were ready, not because someone woke us up. In fact, the backfire effect is a documented thing, as is something called a persecution complex. You don't think most of us we're challenged throughout the years? Of course we were, and it fed into our persecution complex. It made us dig in. What makes most people leave is the cumulative effect of personal awakenings, small bit by small bit, all seen by ourselves, smashed down with cognitive dissonance, until that magical day when it all comes bursting to the fore. You being argumentative will just drive them farther inward.
You are one person trying to tell her, or those elders, something different than she's heard from thousands of JWs over the years. Who do you think will win? The only change must come from within her. Nothing is 100%, but most of us had to do this ourselves. You're an outsider thinking you can beat a cult of 8,000,000 to gain 1, and you don't even know what you're arguing against and where these people will take your points. We as ex-JWs, well versed in all of this, cannot get our families out. It's up to her to save herself, not up to you to be the savior.
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Need advice
by Drwho ini'm a middle aged man.
i dated a jw lady for 3 months ., we never had sex, just made out , half naked , well everything except underwear .
she has been a jw for 40 years ., was married to a jw but he committed adultery 13 years ago so they divorced .
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dubstepped
Those convinced against their will are of the same opinion still. You're wasting your time and fighting a losing battle. Few people are ever woken up by brute force. It isn't your fight to win or yours to control. In back, something called the "backfire effect" is more likely to happen and you'll only make them dig in deeper.
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dubstepped
So freaking awesome! Drive Kevin drive, and like Lot's wife, don't look back. Just go!
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Part One of what could be a long introduction
by LifesNotOver inhello - let me try to explain.
a couple of months ago or so i joined this forum, then shortly after checked out jwrecovery which seemed a better fit personally and joined them.
started to feel comfortable there and they closed, and i pouted for a while.
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dubstepped
Brang it! No reason to hide on here, we're a nice bunch (except those who aren't so nice). Welcome to the forum. I feel for you, having to hide who you are and such. I just can't imagine and am so fortunate that my wife came along for the ride at the same time. You're in good company here though, so let it fly.
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here i am
by notalone ini was a 4th gen born in.my adult children were the 5th.
my mother was one of the newly'anointed' we have all left.
i have been lurking since october.i was really too terrified someone would find out who i was and what would happen.well we are out now so here is a part of my story.
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dubstepped
Welcome to the forum, and screw those people. You are free, with the exception of the damage done by the predator and those that enabled him/her. Get help, live free, and love other people.
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The Natural Beauty of Your Neighborhood
by compound complex indear friends,.
one of my greatest enjoyments is a daily walk.
i see things in far greater detail than when i am driving by.
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dubstepped
Wow CoCo, that original post was fantastic. I'm glad this thread got bumped so I could see it.
I don't really walk around my neighborhood, but I have a little window through which I appreciate the natural beauty that it has to offer. You see, we have an attached carport that we turned into a screened in porch. My wife and I sit on it and watch the seasons. Ours is a fairly busy residential street, and there is always the sound of a passing car, or someone cutting their grass, or people walking by talking. There isn't a lot of privacy in our yard because we're at a corner and just kind of out there with no real back yard and just a front and two sides that are open. However, screening in our carport gives us a space that we can call our own where we're able to sit with a little visual privacy and it just feels like our own little world where we can watch what goes on.
There are birds chirping and flying by. Our neighbors have some evergreen trees that they just love. Robins, gold finches, cardinals, and more bring variety and color, along with their songs. Squirrels run up and down our tree and through our garden over to the neighbor's yard. We have a mating pair of ducks that shows up every spring and loves to come over and walk around our yard, and later in the spring we get to see them walking with their little fluffy offspring. There are often rabbits hopping around, one took a liking to the shelter that our burning bush gave this summer and would sit in the shade. Butterflies float in and out of our garden along with bees, an occasional hummingbird, and a really cool bee moth that we see on occasion. We have an iridescent lizard that likes to work its way in and out of the framing of our screened enclosure that is really neat looking when the sun hits just right. At night we see tons of lightning bugs around this time of year, illuminating the darkness piece by piece. Oh, and one night I looked up and saw an owl sitting on one of the lines, a first for me as I've never seen an owl outside of captivity before. It flew away with its massive wingspan without making a sound.
I created space for my wife to garden. She has four squares that she fills with beautiful flowers and produce. We will have peas, cucumbers, and cantaloupe this year if all goes well. For the first time we opened a new strip of ground to wave petunias right outside the screen that we can enjoy as well. In the Fall our burning bush goes from green to bright red, hence the name, and is beautiful even as the leaves fall and it leaves a crimson pool under the shell of the bush that is left.
I'll post a pic here of my wife gardening from earlier this spring. I have lots of pics of the flowers and ducks and various other things that I've mentioned but don't want to overwhelm the thread, but here's our window to the world:
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27
Helped with fathers funeral, helped with arranging care for my mother - then SHUNNED again!!
by EssexBoy1 inwell i have not been on this site for ages - so long that i had forgotten my username etc and have had to start again!.
anyway briefly - bought up in 'the truth', baptised at 18, married at 21, had kids, got divorced, remarried, disfellowshipped 15 years ago.. parents and brother shun me.. early last year father very ill, calls me.
i arrange to visit him in hospital.
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dubstepped
Ugh, I'm sorry. In April I was un-shunned long enough to say my final goodbye to my dying dad with some of my family around and treated like normal family, only to get shunned after leaving hospice. Of course, when my mom needed legal documents signed for the estate or to ask if they could use my name in the memorial talk that's okay. It is all on their terms. They giveth and they taketh away at their whim. It's all about them. My mom said we'd see each other again. I guess maybe when she's in hospice someday? Screw that. We're human beings, not toys to be played with and put away when done.
Walk away and live your life. Don't let yourself get played over and over by their dysfunction. JWs are narcissists. They don't have a clue what love is.
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Are gays really condemned in the Bible?
by jws inso i was having this argument with a friend about the westboro baptist idiots.
my point is that while they are horrible people, they are pretty much right in that the bible is against gays because it has verses in both the old and the new testament.
which is one of many reasons to reject the bible as merely man-made rules from ancient middle-easterners.. and she argued that there are problems in translation, etc.
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dubstepped
Same sex people couldn't get married, so taking away the anti-gay verses you are still left with the fornication verses. Spin it however you want, homosexuality is condemned. Of course, most who preach against it are fornicating, or just liars, or whatever, so straw and rafter and all that stuff. Or, like me, just throw it all out the window and do no harm and be happy. -
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Did you have "Your chair" or place you sat at the K.H??
by karter ini never really did but lots of the "friends" did like one brother who felt the cold and had "his chair" by the window and was always closing the window when everyone else wanted it open.. karter..
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dubstepped
I was an attendant at a Memorial once and saved myself a seat for my duties, and to have a place to come back to when it started. Someone moved my books and almost hid them. I had nowhere to sit and no books. I should have disassociated then. They were some of the proudest people. Bunch of narcissists in one place.
