Posts by Fleur

I think that saying "Yeah, it's bad, and I'm sorry that you have to go through this." is validating and doesn't try to minimize their pain. The only thing worse, I've found than having really hard times, is people telling you "this too shall pass". That always annoys the living hell out of me.

Yeah, it will, but that doesn't make it any easier in the interim.

Just say "I'm sorry, and if there is anything in my power i can do to help, I'll help." Then follow through. If there is truly nothing you can do to help (ie, you can't afford to give money, etc) then offering and giving a listening ear can be very helpful. Just be there.

hugs

essie

5

Well hey.

by AnonyMouse in

jw
friends

i'm that person that was here like...a month or two ago, then disapeared.

i came back one day, only to find that i was signed out.

password somethin or other.

Fleur

I remember you, Mouse. Keep on keepin' on, every day is a day closer to your freedom. Lay the groundwork, young paduan. Lay it well, so you can hit the ground running.

all the best...

essie

55

Powerful Lyrics - What are you listening to at the moment [Fluff]

by diamondblue1974 in

jw
friends

it's only when i lose myself in someone else.

Fleur

Diamondblue, I didn't know that about Walk On! It's been kinda my personal theme song ever since it came out. Ian that Snow Patrol song chasing cars has been on a loop on my iPod for weeks. It's so beautiful.

Here's a song that I cannot even believe is sung by Clay Aiken, it is actually a Bon Jovi song he's covered on his new cd and the lyrics really spoke to me a lot...

"These Open Arms"What if everything you ever took for granted, was gone?
And everything you ever thought was right, was wrong?
And what if everyone you ever loved was torn, from the pages of your life?
Would you reach out for tomorrow, or try to turn back time?

These open arms will wait for you
These open arms can pull us through
Between what's left and left to do
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms will wait for you

Did you really love the ones you said you loved, think twice.
And did you make a bit of difference in somebody elses life?
Tell me, is there someone you can count on when you need a friend?
Can you see I need a friend?

These open arms will wait for you
These open arms can pull us through
Between whats left and left to do
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms will wait for you

Surrender your heart, Give in, stop questioning why
Open your heart up to love & you'll see you will find

These open arms will wait for you
These open arms can pull us through
Between what's left and left to do
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms
These open arms will wait for you

And another, from the second Keane CD:

"The Frog Prince"An old fairytale told me
The simple heart will be prized again
A toad will be our king
And ugly ogres are heroes

Then you'll shake
Your fist at the sky
"Oh why did I rely
On fashions and small fry?"

All promises broken
Feed your people or lose your throne
And forfeit your whole kingdom
I'd sooner lose it than still live in it alone

You were our golden child
But the gentle and the mild
Inherit the earth, while

Your prince's crown
Cracks and falls down
Your castle hollow and cold
You've wandered so far
From the person you are
Let go brother, let go
Cos now we all know

Soon, someone will put a spell on you
Perfume, treasure, sorcery, every trick they know
You will lie in a deep sleep
That's when

Your prince's crown
Cracks and falls down
Your castle hollow and cold
You've wandered so far
From the person you are
Let go brother, let go
Cos now we all know...

(though my alltime favorite Keane song, and perhaps one of my favorite songs of all time, is Somewhere Only We Know...)

thanks for the tunes this morning everyone...will be listening to some of them that I have and thinking of you all.

love

essie

21

The Capable Wife....

by LivingInReality in

jw
friends

right before i got disfellowshipped in 2002 i was sitting in the kingdom hall listening to an elder give a public needs talk.....and this one floored me.. so the brother starts talking about what it means to be a capable wife...of course all of the scriptures and regular bullshit we've heard over and over....but then he goes on to say...."so what i'm saying sisters is.... to save money to help with the household you can make a garden and get food from that to make your dinners.... you can learn how to sew so that you can make your own clothes instead of spending money to go and buy them at expensive department stores.... and you could look into your circumstances to see if its feasible for you to quit your jobs to stay home and run the household....blah blah blah.." i can't much remember the rest because my head had blown up to the size of jupiter with the hot steam i was about to let go in the middle of the talk.

i decided it was better to get up and go... and i did.

i only mention this now...because (now divorced from my ministerial servant husband of 10 years), i am a single mother that has worked her ass off not only in the secular world, but now as a mother raising two children, getting my college degree and maintaining every avenue of the household responsibilities on my own.

Fleur

Hi Shannon! Welcome to the forum, I can tell you're going to be a marvelous edition to our Estrogen Department LOL

I would have to say "Be a better wife, and pray more." was the worst thing they said to me. This was said to me personally on a shepherding call when I begged the elders for help with my husband's temper.

They also added "Don't be like Job's wife. When Job was depressed instead of comforting him his wife told him to just curse god and die. You have to be supportive when he's depressed."

Depressed! He was abusing me! But they had blinders on, I was the PO's daughter in law, and there was no way they were going to find fault with allmighty HIS son.

Single parents are heroes. I was one for a couple years but not so long as I am still not totally in awe of people who do it for years. I barely qualified. You all are winning the war every day, and I take my hat off to you.

Again, welcome!

hugs

essie

71

Bizarre November 2006 KM

by yakata in

the insert is called "how do i view blood fractions and medical procedures involving my own blood?

" i will attempt to transcribe the more salient points for everyone here.. paragraph 1 (verbatim): the bible commands christians to "abstain ... from blood.

" (acts 15:20) thus, jehovah's witnesses do not accept transfusions of whole blood or the four primary components of blood-namely, red blood cells, white blood cells, platelets, and plasma.

Fleur

I've always put it this way: How much lettuce before it's a salad? Is it wrong to eat lettuce in salad but you can have a slice of the same head of lettuce on your sandwich?

No wonder my mother was freaking out over this. Those of the really, really old school will just continue to refuse it all.

I can't believe that they've even got hemoglobin in there, 33% indeed...does that mean that fornication is okay if you only touch 33% of...oh nevermind.

Flaming hipocrates. If there were a fiery hell, they would surely burn in it.

Unfreakingbelievable.

essie

16

Someone did the 70's, lets do the 80's.

by restrangled in

jw
friends

here is what i remember:.

huey lewis and the news, madona, dire straights, "brothers in arms" !

i remember selling the first exciting computer called the commodor 64.. there was space invaders, vhs movies became a big deal such as "on golden pond" beta reared its head but never took off.. my husband and i worked for a company selling these players/machines and renting movies in chicago.

Fleur

Cyndi Lauper.

Duran Duran

That animated Take on me video

Swatch Watches (never owned one, wanted one)

Rubber bracelets

leg warmers

Wham!

Purple Rain

Princess Diana everywhere in the news

Getting baptized *groan*

Death of my grandfather

Falling in love for the first time

Getting my heart broken for the first (not the last) time (and on my 16th b-day)

Learning to drive

my first job

Money for Nothing

Back to the Future

Huey Lewis and the news (ugh)

The fixx, a flock of seagulls

Punky Brewster

Take all you want...I got more LOL

:)

essie

28

My Story

by ladybug25 in

my parents were baptized when i was three years old.

so, you could say that i was "born and raised" as a jw.

i was baptized at age 11. i was a regular auxilary pioneer from age 14 to 15. my parents became inactive at about age 14. it was very hard trying to be a "good young sister" especially after being told you're a burden to the pioneers that have to always provide rides in service and to/from the meetings.

Fleur

Welcome, Ladybug! It really says a lot about your relationship with your husband that you are still together, couples less in love would not have survived the transition thus far.

You are definitely in the right place. I will link a couple threads from my experiences for you to read and I hope that they help. Some of them were posted under my original username here.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/3468/1.ashx

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/3958/1.ashx

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/4771/1.ashx

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/81783/1.ashx

The one about Holidays is for your hubby :) Maybe he'll read it eventually. I hope that you will soon be sharing and decorating the tree together.

It takes a long time to break free, especially when they had you as a zygote. They had me then too, and it's a long journey, but it is so worthwhile and your children will thank you for it someday.

Keep talking and keep reading, there is a lot of support to be had here. You are among friends.

hugs

essie

45

SHOCKING!

by Dansk in

jw
friends

i just managed to see the last 15 minutes or so of the 'tonight with trevor mcdonald' programme on british tv.

it concerned young children under 12 who had their blood tested and it was found they all had (at least those i saw) high levels of toxic chemicals in their blood.

one family ate organic produce and were generally the "healthy" type and yet their daughter had the highest levels of certain chemicals than others in the study.. a toxicologist said that although the chemicals were high we shouldn't worry too much as they are twice as high in the usa!!!.

Fleur

(((((((Ian))))))))))) I am sorry to hear that they think it's back.

I have to tell you, as a mother this scares the living **** out of me. I have done a lot of work with children's charities that work with kids with cancer and it's terrifying. Really makes me think that I should maybe listen to my mother, pitch my microwave...but like you said it's just everywhere, what can you do?

I read a really sad thing online awhile back about a little boy who died of cancer, they believed he got it because his mother had repeatedly used anti-lice shampoos on him containing pesticides. He had been exposed once and then she took to using it whenever there was a 'scare' at school or whatever...not so many times but more than once and he did die of it.

Scares me beyond reason.

Thinking of you...

love

essie

34

NOT REALLY SURPRISED!

by Dansk in

jw
friends

well, it had to happen one day - only claire and i thought we'd be somewhat older and karl would have finished his university course.

karl telephoned earlier this week to let us know we're to become grandparents!

as karl is only 21 and has just started university i felt like reading the riot act - but what's the point!

Fleur

Well done Ian...your supportive approach is fantastic and no doubt appreciated.

I second that...they will be so happy to have that. Congratulations...babies are a blessing and a miracle.

hugs and love!

Essie