I also regret not being allowed to spend any time with my non-JW family. I'm 28 years old now, yet I don't know the names of many of my cousins, neices and nephews. It's been a year and a half that I've been coming to family dinners now, and they're finally warming up to me. So now that I'm "inactive" the Witness family members have just about cut me off, but the non-JW members have had no problem accepting me back. They understand.
littletree
JoinedPosts by littletree
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29
What's The Most Unreasonable Thing You Did As A Witness?
by minimus inlooking back at all the sacrifices that you had to make to be a jehovah's witness, which one was the most unreasonable??
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Hi everybody, I´m a new member from Spain
by benito infirst of all, i want to apologize for all the mistakes i will probably make, i m not very good at english, it s very hard for me to think in another language different than my native tongue (spanish, of course!!)..
i ve been lurking through this forum for a long time but i didn t dare write here because of my lack of knowledge of the language but i changed my mind.
i think i can give a different point of view from other members of usa of uk, it seems that most of the members are from theses countries.
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littletree
Welcome, Benito! I too only read posts on this site for almost a year before I made one myself. I also hope to one day have the courage to dissassociate from that Organization, as you have already done. Donna/littletree
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Are you posting from your job?
by jt stumbler ini keep jwd up at work all day.
i frequent this site throughout the day.
when i get home at night, the last thing i want to do is look at a computer screen.
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littletree
My computer is down right now (has been for the last year!), so yup the only time I can post is from work. Sometimes, it makes me mad because I miss some of the good threads that are jumping in the evening. haha
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the reasons why we leave makes a difference...
by littletree ini have a dilemma (did i spell dilemma correctly?
): i am the only person i know, of any of my former witness associates, who left because i started doubting/stopped believing the teachings.
i did research on the internet, read books, talked to people from different religions, etc.
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littletree
JamesThomas, NO WAY am I still in it! I stopped going a year and a half ago, but I'm not disfellowshipped or disassociated. And garybuss, yup, almost all of my friends from back then were raised in it. Yes, it makes your world really small. And, GetBusyLiving, as far as getting shunned by them, I think it just happened again! A disfellowshipped girl who was at first happy to hear from me just suddenly stop replying to my messages... maybe because I mentioned the word "apostate" (to tell her that I don't like that label). Geez, I'm a sucker for punishment. Guess that's why I was a perfect JW. Thought being treated bad meant that I was doing right. willyloman: good points, and good illustration. The programming is so strong. I'm 28 years old, but I am still pleasantly shocked when I meet people who are really happy, but have never been Witnesses. My mom would say that's Satan keeping 'em happy. If it weren't for her, I would just dissasociate. She and I have always been like "peas and carrots". :-)
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the reasons why we leave makes a difference...
by littletree ini have a dilemma (did i spell dilemma correctly?
): i am the only person i know, of any of my former witness associates, who left because i started doubting/stopped believing the teachings.
i did research on the internet, read books, talked to people from different religions, etc.
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littletree
Ivy, it sure is a heavy burden. It's been a year and a half, but when I have problems or uncertainties in my relationship, I sometimes resort to feeling like maybe "they" were right, and that I'm being punished for "disobeying Jehovah". It's crazy! Even after all I've read, and all that I feel. I just wish one of them would come around and start doubting like I did. This forum has been such a help, that I imagine to be able to have these conversations face to face would be even better. Yet, I can't do that without risking being disfellowshipped. Maybe some of them secretly doubt, but I ain't gonna be the one to find out! That's why I had to slip in my real name in case in other XJWs from the Baltimore, MD area are on this forum (I've always had a problem being subtle :-) ). tinytree aka Donna
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the reasons why we leave makes a difference...
by littletree ini have a dilemma (did i spell dilemma correctly?
): i am the only person i know, of any of my former witness associates, who left because i started doubting/stopped believing the teachings.
i did research on the internet, read books, talked to people from different religions, etc.
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littletree
Thank you all for your comments. And thanks (logansrun, talesin, and hartstrings) for all the good advice. It's better now that I have made a few non-Witness friends. The other thing I'm afraid of is that by associating with inactive Witnesses, it still ties me to that Organization and will give the elders a reason to come after me. One guy who was like a brother to me (he's an active JW) e-mailed me to tell me he missed me and wished that I'd "come back to Jehovah". Well, I responded- as tactfully as possible- that I had no intention of coming back since I was perfectly happy, and that I'm still a good person. Then he went right back and tells my old friends that I "sound like an apostate"! What a dirty thing to do. How dare he pretend to care, only to do something so unloving. Anyway, I know that I shouldn't care about what JWs think of me, but it's still fresh so it hurts. Stuff like that makes me see even more why JWs aren't nicer than my new "wordly" friends. Trying to creat a whole new friendship base, after your Witness ones are ripped away is pretty dificult. My coworkers, and forum, have been a great help (I lurk more than I post because my computer at home is down). And my boyfriend (who is nicer and nobler than ANY man in that whole JW bunch) has been the greatest source of support of all. Thanks everyone.
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JWs And Ex-JWs--Do You Struggle With Depression Because You Were A JW?
by minimus ini've seen how some are so burdened by the fact that they were witnesses, that literally, every day is a struggle.
are you in need of therapeutic help because you are or were a jehovah's witness?
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littletree
I too was already predisposed for depression and anxiety (no joke: i remember feeling depressed as a toddler), so that JW attitude of "if you're feeling down it's because you're not doing enough" was NO help. Although I still struggle with the anxiety disorder, depression not as much, I DEFINITELY felt better about life once I stopped going to the Hall. I was a very sincere Witness, yet I never felt good about myself because I struggled with field service. That "low hour publisher" label is really hard for someone who has low self-esteem. And to see other young Witnesses who I KNEW were hypocrites, but were pioneers, put up on a pedestal... it really hurt. The elders, who mostly do not understand mental and emotional illness, only had Watchtower-textbook answers: pray more, study harder, go out in service and you'll feel better. It wasn't enough. I am now comfortable with the fact that I'm not sure about God, or life, because it's all a learning process. I no longer associate my emotional health with "spiritual weakness". Like I said, I still have rough days, but nothing like before.
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the reasons why we leave makes a difference...
by littletree ini have a dilemma (did i spell dilemma correctly?
): i am the only person i know, of any of my former witness associates, who left because i started doubting/stopped believing the teachings.
i did research on the internet, read books, talked to people from different religions, etc.
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littletree
I have a dilemma (did I spell dilemma correctly?): I am the only person I know, of any of my former Witness associates, who left because I started doubting/stopped believing the teachings. I did research on the Internet, read books, talked to people from different religions, etc. On top of that, I'd always had unresolved doubts about certain JW teachings (144,000, 1914, paradise, and why God permits suffering), so I had more than enough reason to not be an active Witness anymore. However, a few other Witness girls that I know who are inactive or disfellowshipped, are out for "morality" reasons. The problem is not that I look down on them; it's the other way around. Although they see us as being in the same "inactive" boat, and they want to "hang out" with me, they still talk and act with that guilt complex- of someone who still believes. I don't feel I have the freedom to express how I feel, or why I left, because they still regard it as "apostacy". It's really frustrating! My question is do any of you know people like this? I sincerely don't want to "influence" them if they're happy with their beliefs, yet at the same time, I wish they could open their eyes and see that the Organization is just another religion, not the only way to happy. And how can I truly be a friend with someone who might just turn around and go right back, then cut me off??? Thanks in advance for any posts. littletree (real name, Donna)
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How many people here are Faders?
by misspeaches inhow many people that come to this board are faders only?
i am interested to know the statistics on how many people have left the borg because they have discovered their untruths or become disillusioned.. thanks,.
miss peache
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littletree
I only "faded" for a year. First it was just because I was tired of not keeping up with all the studying and field service, then I just said "to heck with it". I read COC, and then started browsing the Internet. Once I felt strong enough, I just stopped going. I haven't been back to my Hall since September 1, 2003 (it was the last day of our District Convention; and I almost vomited when they started talking about the evils on the Internet), but I still live in fear of getting disfellowshipped (because I don't want to lose my family).
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11
What's your favourite song at the moment?
by Es insorry if this comes up twice wasnt sure if it worked the first time.
my fav song at the moment is comfortably numb by the scissor sisters es
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littletree
Thanks to Gwen Stefani, although I don't have a favorite song, I can't get that dang "this sh.. is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S" out of my head! If I had a favorite song, it would probably be something that came out in the 70s, eventhough I was just a baby! (I love disco. BeeGees rock.)