It's the ole red pill, blue pill dilema.
I personally want to be fully awake and know the truth. Red pill all the way!
I would classify myself as POMA but not agnostic to the JW belief system, agnostic to the Christian belief system. With that said, I also want to believe the mainstream Christian faith. What else is there? I don't believe we just randomly developed out of amino acids.
Every JW reaches a fork in the road where they have the ole red pill, blue pill dilema. I've seen it happen several times, friends and close family members. Usaully they take the blue pill which is the least path of resistance and problems. In the end though it is the wrong choice and causes more problems.