Posts by Jez

14

Parental Obligation - Please Define

by jeanniebeanz in

jw
friends

.

what would you consider to be the basic, intermediate and advanced obligations of a parent?

i am very interested in your opinions.. jeannie.

Jez

I want Jez to adopt me.

My daughters would tell you that you were crazy... .I just choose to believe that they will only see how hard this job, that I make look easy, really is when they themselves become parents. To try to be a parent requires a hint of slyness, alot of difficulty, constant adjustment, thoughtful readjustments, unending self questioning, 'dancing'-knowing when to come forward and when to stay back, patience that the best rewards of parenting take a long time to see, consistency even when you are not sure you are doing it all right, knowing how much to reveal about yourself and how much to hide, and most of all-uninhibited love.

Jez

42

Anyone here know much about Cat Psychology ??

by bull01lay in

jw
friends

my wife and i have a new cat - a 7 month old blue smoke persian named olly (pedigree name is pannonius olympian).

olympian he is too - weighing in at 5kg already !!.

he's extremely timid, and hides pretty much constantly, meowing (squeaking now cos i think he's made his throat sore, poor mite).

Jez

Will the suckling stop? (see my above post)

and we are going to build a big outdoor cage in the spring for "George" so he stops hunting my dogs and my feet.

Jez

19

Do the angels guide people to the witnesses?

by undercover in

jw
friends

i remember growing up that we used to hear experiences of people who felt lost in life or weren't happy and miraculasly a jw showed up at the door and brought life-saving good news to the distressed one who moments ago was seeking help from god in prayer.. and there were the experiences of people who led a life of debauchery until realizing that they weren't happy and they had to change.

enter jws as a study was started and the former evil-doer was transformed into a zealous servant of god.. we've all heard the stories.

they were always shared at assemblies and public talks to impress upon us that god's spirit was acting upon either the witness who found the searching on or that the spirit moved the searching one to find the organization.

Jez

Here is a different perspective:

First of all, I don't think it is possible to understand the ways in which God works. Whether or not they are JWs, they were people, in the area, and if their knocking on someone's door stopped suicide or took someone away from their normal routine or made them think.....maybe God did send them. They are people and God may not see labels: "Jehovahs Witness" "Catholic" "Buddha". Maybe he just sees people and what kind of a soul they are housing. It is humans that see the label first.

Secondly:

Does a mature person really need someone to tell them to stop or they will die at the hands of a god?

Well, not ALL people are 'mature', some are still on that journey and always will be, if they are still at a stage where outside influences affect them, they respond better to community responsibility or need an initial goal to achieve that someone else set for them....so be it. I have faith that as a person continues that journey, they will grow from 'needing' someone to tell them to 'inner understanding' and a release of guilt etc. It is how a child develops, they NEED parents to tell them what to do, what not to do, right and wrong, but as they grow and mature....(a continual unending process for humans)...they learn that the motivation comes from within....but psychology teaches us that the 'within' is just your internalization of mother/father. You, in essence, learn to parent yourself. Maybe that is what religion does for some people.

We are all at different stages of 'needs'. Jez

42

Anyone here know much about Cat Psychology ??

by bull01lay in

jw
friends

my wife and i have a new cat - a 7 month old blue smoke persian named olly (pedigree name is pannonius olympian).

olympian he is too - weighing in at 5kg already !!.

he's extremely timid, and hides pretty much constantly, meowing (squeaking now cos i think he's made his throat sore, poor mite).

Jez

I have never liked cats, but got a kitten for my husbands birthday because he adores them, now back to topic, this kitten was 100% friendly from the moment we picked it up in the store. We spent alot of time with him before we bought.

When we brought him home, he immediately settled in, no problem. He plays with my 2 dogs, sleeps beside them, sleeps with us every night, bascially he is perfect and very outgoing but very cuddly. He insists when we come home from work, that we pick him up and kiss/cuddle him. It is like he knows that if he is not on his best behaviour, that he will go mysteriously missing.

Now if only I could get him to stop sucking on and kneading a blanket, or my shirt at 4am in the morning. I hate that noise. Jez

14

Parental Obligation - Please Define

by jeanniebeanz in

jw
friends

.

what would you consider to be the basic, intermediate and advanced obligations of a parent?

i am very interested in your opinions.. jeannie.

Jez

Basic: Food, shelter, clothing

Intermediate: Love, faith, hope, respect for self, others and property, excitement for living, play, positive attitude, encouragement, extended family, plant a desire for life long learning, individuality (place in the world), problem solving skills, chores, friendship skills, love of nature, love of exercise, the meaning of unconditional love, traditions and customs both family and cultural, positive reinforcement, discipline. Travel, vacations, family time.

Advanced: Critical thinking skills, independance, responsibility, social awareness, ownership of failures and successes, self awareness (why they do the things they do), aware of strengths and how to accent them, aware of weaknesses and how to combat them, desire to succeed, support them as they walk into life independantly. Walk beside, not in front or behind, ready to put an arm out if necessary. Letting them fall, waiting for them to get up on their own but ready to step in and help. Letting them succeed, and allowing them to intristically feel the pleasure of it. (as well as praise). Set unmoveable guidelines/rules, only a few majorly important ones. Encouraging debate, allowing debate/different opinions while teaching respect. Apologizing, admiting mistakes, admiting that you don't have all the answers.

Not an all inclusive list, but that is how I parent. Jez

20

Choices, if I could change only one.

by Fatfreek in

if life were only like some rewriteable media -- rewind to where you'd change something, make a different choice, and proceed.

i'd go back exactly 50 years when i conceded, reluctantly, to study with the jw's alongside my parents.

i was some 15 years old and, admittedly, naive.

Jez

Ever see the movie, "The Butterfly Effect"????

Jez

32

For those of you who know........................

by defd in

jw
friends

about my car accident and the total destruction of the truck i bought 4months prior.

i got a new vehicle...

stupid van!.

Jez

LOL Daystar!

I have a 2004 Dodge Minivan...I HATE it and am trading it in on a brand new Mazda 3 or a Kia next year. Stupid family van, kids are too old now, they don't come with us as often as they use to, so it is 2 young lookin hotties, driving around in a stupid van.

Stupid ugly vans. Jez

33

New here.

by On the Fence in

this is my first time posting, although i've read for a while.

i've been a (bad example of) a witness now for about 15 years.

in all those 15 years, i did not at any time have a good friend within the congo.

Jez

I have never felt more spiritual and more in tune to what I call 'real spirituality'. I don't attend church anymore, but I did go to a local easygoing church for a while after I was disfellowshipped. It was there that I learned what it felt like to attend without guilt, with no one counting how many were there, no one asking for your time, etc. I wanted to be there.

I learned what it felt like to be motivated by LOVE rather than guilt or fear. I was encouraged to find answers that lie within me, not TOLD constantly what is right or wrong or what I should or should not be doing. It was weird and difficult to learn to trust myself.

If a community of people is what you personally need, check out your local churches and find one that matches your needs. If I were you, I would use my family immensely. Lucky you to have them.

Welcome from Jez

136

Something I want to tell you apostates

by LeftBehind in

jw
friends

i want you to know that you have destroyed a family because of your lies about jehovah and his organization.

a family member went apostate and has turned his back on jehovah.

he told us he is never coming back and i know he went and visited internet sites.

Jez

A family member went apostate and has turned his back on Jehovah

This is what irritates me the most. The assumption that a person that has left the religion called Jehovahs Witnesses has automatically left God.

Jez

27

Serious Question ...Do you ever HATE yourself by times?

by Legolas in

jw
friends

.

if you do, how does one shut off that feeling?.......

anyone got any suggestions?

Jez

Sometimes: but here is what I do:

*dive into my university courses harder, look back on old essays that were great (so you could take a course in something that interests you, 'become' a more interesting person to yourself and others)

*exercise

*I turn to someone I know loves me, and tell them that I feel like shit. They always pick me up.

Hugs to you, you are fascinating, every one has a story, we are all worthy to be here, because we are here.

Jez