If the WTS policy is that you have to have two witnesses before they can do anything then they did. Both women said he abused them. Isn't that two witnesses that can attest to his being a rapist/molester? Then he did it again. Isn't that more proof?
karategirl
JoinedPosts by karategirl
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46
J.W. Congregation Cleared of Abuse Charges
by Kenneson in.
the following article comes out of minnesota and is entitled "annandale church isn't liable in abuse suit.".
i'm off to work now, so don't have time to comment, but would like to post it before i leave.. http://www.startribune.com/stories/462/4655055.html
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55
Before You Leave The Witnesses, You MUST Make New Friends!!!
by minimus inmy advice to anyone that is thinking of leaving the "organization" is to make friends (real friends) with people other than jehovah's witnesses.
the sad truth is that jws are only conditional "friends".
they will drop you like a hot potato if they think you want to leave.
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karategirl
I unfortunately had been a good little dub and never lived a double life. didn't even make friends with the neighbors. of course we lived in an abusive household and so kept to ourselves anyway. right before I was df'd i had moved to a new congregation where there were no youth so didn't have any friends at all around. then i was df'd very abruptly and instantly cut off by my family that was still in. In fact they were the ones that told on me.
Well, made a few worldy friends right off the bat from work and unfortunately because we were young and caught up in a fast life, they stabbed me in the back. Then I met my husband, now ex, and he sucked me in for years. Since I had no support system while married to him and was cut off from my dub family, and my dad's family had always viewed us dub kids as the black sheep of the family (hush hush and don't talk about it, many uncomfortable moments at family reunions), I faired very badly for about 7 years. Very alone and in an abusive marriage.
At a certain point I moved back to Oregon. Had been gone for about ten years. Wound up in Portland. I knew I was home almost instantly. After finding a job and settling in my father visited me(was trying to build a relationship with my dad's family now, still trying). Unknowingly I had moved only two blocks from where my parents lived when I was born. Working at a store where they had shopped and went to the local hangout that they went to and was still there. It was so strange. Within months I had made the best friends that I have had in my whole life. Real people, good people. They helped me through some of the hardest times of my life and still deal with my crazy issues as a result of a life in a cult and an abusive family.
I feel in many ways that my Mother somehow led me here because she knew this is where I needed to be. She died a year before Ieft the organization. She was suffered so much and wanted to rest. Now that she has moved on I like to believe she now knows the truth and is happy to see that four of her five children have made their way out and are on the road to piecing it all back together.
This Christmas will be the first time in 12 years that all five of us will be together at the same time. I have only seen my brother twice in the last 11 years and have yet to see my little sister. The last time I saw her she was six. she is now 17. I cried uncontrollably for an hour after I found out we would all be together.
If you can, definitely form friendships before you leave.
Stephanie
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22
Don Adams, WT president, in Slovenia
by izobcenec inyes, he came to slovenia and gave a talk to about 1500 jw's as zone overseer.... .
here is the pic:.
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karategirl
he definitely gets TMS points for using gestures for emphasis. Good JOB!!
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33
Were You Afraid Of The Elders?.Did Ya Love Em?...What Was Your View of Them
by minimus ini've heard of brothers and sisters saying that they have "prayed for the elders because they love them for their hard work and sacrifice".
i've also heard of how some in the congregation were petrified of the elders and of course, there were those that said they were either only men or that they were direct representatives of jehovah god himself.
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karategirl
I wasn't afraid of them because I was one of the drones that never questioned as was labeled one of the "good youth" that didn't lead a double life. No, I was deathly afraid of my abusive step father who went on to become an elder years after I was df'd.
Funny, but I actually felt nervous around the higher up ones, ya know the POs, COs and the like. Like they were the freaking President of the United States or something. Especially the wealthy ones (which were many of them). See as a woman in the organization I already had low self esteem and felt inferior to such an important MAN. Almost like you wanted to put a scarf over your head just to talk to them.
Then there were the ones that you never could understand how they were elders because you knew how they treated their children and wives. I remember the perve that was on my first JC when I only got privately reproved. He asked so many details about exactly what me and my boyfriend did I thought he was going to start masturbating as we spoke. He wouldn't let up, "when he touched your breast was it over your shirt or did he slip his hand under your clothing and was that under your shirt but on top of your bra or did he unhook your bra too?" Seriously.
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37
Good excuses for missing meetings and going out in service.
by frankiespeakin in.
i know a lot of lurkers are probably looking for good excuses and would like a list they could refur to..
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karategirl
Tell them you had pms cramps, most elders would turn red and walk away. Any reference to female functions is usally quite embarassing for them.
Another I used to use when I lived near Washington DC was that we were stuck in a traffic jam and didn't arrive home until almost 8:30. We would have only arrived for the closing song and prayer. We didn't want to distract anyone from paying attention so we read the Theocratic Ministry School guidebook in the car and discussed it. NOT!!
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Do you know any JW's that were Disfellowshipped or Reprooved over 3 times?
by booker-t ina girl i work with told me the other day that she is going to the elders and ask them to "reinstate" her for the 4th time.
i told her she must be out of her mind.
why would any jw go through all of that headache?
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karategirl
I knew the son of an elder that was disfellowshipped for fornication and continued to live at home even though he was in his early twenties. Thus the family could still talk to him and be around him. After being reinstated he committed fornication with not one but two friends of mine but nobody told. Then he was disfellowshipped again for messing around with a worldly girl, someone caught him. This time he wasn't living at home, yet his family still associated with him on the sly. Including his pioneer mother, ministerial servant brother and elder father. He continued to boink my roommate and another girl without anyone knowing. He was reinstated again. I don't know what happened after that cause I moved and was disfellowshipped myself for, you guessed it, FORNICATION!!
This just shows that even elders still talk to their family, so bullshit to that rule too.
karategirl
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33
What Do You Do When You Get The "Blues"???
by minimus inevery once in a while we all get the blues.
we start overthinking, overanalyzing----we dwell on negatives.
what do you do to get out of this frame of mind?
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karategirl
I usually try and talk to someone i trust. Or if not real serious, like mentioned before just get busy doing something. Sometimes just cleaning the house helps you work it out and feel better. Sometimes a change scenery is nice. If at work, make sure and go out for lunch. If at home, take a walk, a drive, go get ice cream. Something like that. But if it isn't going away no matter what, seek professional help. Don't let it go too long.
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can't get close
by karategirl inhaving been taught that dating is only when you are ready for a marriage mate and then you get married forever, i was so quick to commit.
almost got married after 6 months to the first boyfriend i ever had when i was 18, a jw of course.
then i saw the light and didn't do it.
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karategirl
Thanks everyone. Just want to clarify that i don't jump in bed all the time with everyone I meet. (at least not since my early twenties, ha!ha!) Also I am in therapy and it seems to be helping. Over the last four years I have finally learned my own self worth and that I don't have to settle. I am finally happy with being me and actually very glad to be single. Just fear that I may never feel love again and go through life without ever having that soulmate companion thing. Maybe I am more afraid that it doesn't really exist. Not sure, anyway thanks guys. karategirl
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10
can't get close
by karategirl inhaving been taught that dating is only when you are ready for a marriage mate and then you get married forever, i was so quick to commit.
almost got married after 6 months to the first boyfriend i ever had when i was 18, a jw of course.
then i saw the light and didn't do it.
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karategirl
having been taught that dating is only when you are ready for a marriage mate and then you get married forever, I was so quick to commit. almost got married after 6 months to the first boyfriend I ever had when I was 18, a jw of course. then i saw the light and didn't do it. left the truth a little later and went crazy. partied and had some escapades. it was great, then I crashed. wanted commitment, as i had been taught. unfortunately, an abusive and cruel man saw that and pounced. six years of hell ensued.
now, been single for four years and have managed to have only short term sexual partners. no matter how hard i try, i cannot feel anything for anyone. only lust. tried to date one guy for about three months and the whole time i felt suffocated and anxious. couldn't wait for him to leave, didn't even care if he didn't call. was actually relieved when i found somthing that was bad enough to dump him.
the ironic catch, i still just want a healthy and committed relationship but i am so disillusioned about what is healthy and what is love and whether I am capable of it. i mean growing up around jw marriages and then experiencing mine doesn't leave much room to know. still don't know anyone in a healthy relationship. sad
does anyone else have this problem?
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15
The most frustrating, sad thing in the world
by Soledad ini just learned that an ex-cowoker of mine became engaged to her abusive boyfriend.
she is probably one of the brightest, prettiest people i have ever known--but she doesn't believe that because her boyfriend would rather have her believe she is dumb, ugly and nothing at all without him.
i am so sad for this girl.. she was in college last year and he made her give it up.
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karategirl
Good for you to tell her mom. just like everyone has said it takes her wanting to be gone before she will stay gone. if that makes sense. Basically, you can call the police, get someone to rough him up, whatever, she will just go right back until she is ready. give her a book as was suggested. if she can't hide something like that, a pamphlet on the signs of an abuser or codependency. she can read it quick and get rid of it.
tell her, "you can say whatever you want and make excuses, but we both know it is not right and that you deserve better. love shouldn't hit you. if he really loves you he wouldn't hurt you. but you are the one that has to live your life and when you are good and tired and can't take it anymore I am here. no one can force you but there will come a time when you will go through whatever you need to in order to finally have had enough, hopefully you will live through it. if so, call me and I will be there, no questions asked, any time day or night. but you have to be ready for that step."
also encourage her to wait having children.