Posts by Billygoat

First of all, I understand. Holidays can be really lonely. But only if you buy into the marketing hype like someone else mentioned. It really helps to just remember that it's a four-day weekend and you get time to do what YOU want. Clean the house, get a pedicure or massage, read a book, treat yourself to a nice meal out, etc. You make this weekend what YOU want it to be.

It might help to get involved in community activities...like signing up to serve dinner for the homeless at Christmas! A lot of people that celebrate the holidays feel that there is something missing...and it helps when you do good things for others not so fortunate, but always remember to pamper yourself as well! You are important too!

I think this is really great advice. Many years ago, Thanksgiving depressed me. But I started helping my church cook on Thanksgiving morning for the homeless. We don't serve them at the church, but we box the Thanksgiving meal (turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, green beans, and all the trimmings) into individual meal boxes and take them to homeless shelters and underpasses. We partner with another church to do the actual delivery and it's AWESOME. Seriously. I started this years ago when I had NOBODY in my life. Today I still do it, even though I have my husband's lovely family as my own. It was interesting to find that they've been doing the same thing all these years and I never knew it. We could have been working side by side and I had no clue.

All that to say that there are people out there that are really down and out. And they could use your encouragement on a holiday like this. Especially if they knew that you are going through the same loneliness. Partner up with a soup kitchen or a local shelter. Help take care of those less fortunate. Seeing what they go through REALLY makes you focus on what you have...not what you don't have.

Blessings,

Andi

27

Ever think why the collection box is in the back of the KHall?

by biddie in

jw
friends

i used to thinik it was better... but now i realize it was a way for the elders to keep an eye on who was giving!

biddie

Billygoat

This might be a silly question, so bear with me...I left the JWs before I became a full-fledge working adult...

Today, when I give to my church, they keep track of it. I get a statement every January that shows the total that I've tithed for the year. It's really great, because I then hold onto it for tax purposes. IT REALLY helps with tax deductions now that I'm a home owner.

If all your donations as a JW are anonymous cash donations, it's obvious you don't get a written statement that proves what you've donated. Do JWs even get such a thing? Are they able to keep track of their donations and deduct them? Does the WTS get a better deal when they don't have to report how many anonymous "donations" were given to them??? I'm wondering if the WTS has a financial angle for making everything anonymous...

19

UPDATE: My sister Robin

by Lady Lee in

jw
friends

i just got back from montreal.

i was there a bit longer than expected this time.. my granddaughter was christened megan elizabeth on saturday.

after the service and the dinner i met with my two daughters to talk about my sister and her recent death.. my brother in toronto was holding a similar opportunity in toronto for some of her friends.. i read the post i made at my sister robin rip mar.

Billygoat

(((((Lady Lee)))))) So good to hear how you are dealing with this so well.

*Robin, rest in peace sweet sister. *

Andi

28

Spankings Cause Aggression and Anxiety in Kids

by Gretchen956 in

from msnbc:.

spanking can fuel aggression, anxiety in kids .

physical discipline leads to more behavior problems, research suggestsreutersupdated: 3:52 p.m. et nov. 21, 2005. .

Billygoat

Wow, this thread has really brought up some memories. MOST of my most vivid childhood memories contain the belt my dad used on a regular basis. I remember him using it before he became a JW, but I remember it with more frequency AFTER he became a JW. Like he felt encouraged to use it more often. But I was the type to rebel even more the more the belt was used. I don't know why my dad didn't get it through his thick skull that beatings did NOT work for me.

I remember, when I got grounded, that it meant no dessert, no television, no playing outside and get this...NO HUGS AND KISSES. Now if that's not f***ed up, then I don't know what is. That will NEVER EVER EVER happen to my kid.

Mrs. Jones,

You mentioned you respect your kids. That is HUGE in my book. I don't have kids myself, but when I was a camp counselor, I rarely had to discipline some of the "problem kids". I treated them like they were the smart, capable (little) humans I knew they could be. Some of the other counselors shouted and screamed at their troops constantly, but I rarely had to do even that. I very clearly told the kid that I KNEW they understood the right thing to do and they would choose correctly. I trusted them and told them so. And I have to say, NOT ONCE was I let down. They felt empowered with the respect they didn't get at home and suddenly, doing the right thing was appealing to them. They even went out of their way to please me. Some of the other counselors just never "got it". To this day, I have parents at church coming up telling me what a difference I made in their kids' lives, by just a week of attention. I can't help but beam! Those little 8 year olds are now in senior high school and driving cars. They'll be graduating in another year's time. Damn all that "growing up" crap.

*sigh*

Andi

99

Police caution woman for breastfeeding in public!

by nicolaou in

i just watched the local bbc news and there was a story about a woman who'd fed her baby while sitting on a public bench.

she finished and was on her way when a police car drew up beside her and asked her to stop.

there had been a complaint.

Billygoat

(apart from all the slurping and belching that went on under my jumper - but then I told my husband 'darling, no-one wants to hear that')

I have to say I had a friend who used to get hers out in good witless company, but her nipples were like small south sea islands and it made me feel sick. I just wished she had subscribed to the big wooly jumper brigade, and not the 'I am an earth mother and you are my audience' brigade.

LMAO!!!! *snort* LMAO!!!

This is EXACTLY what I'm talking about. I think a mother can breastfeed without making it a tasteless production.

Katie, you kill me.

99

Police caution woman for breastfeeding in public!

by nicolaou in

i just watched the local bbc news and there was a story about a woman who'd fed her baby while sitting on a public bench.

she finished and was on her way when a police car drew up beside her and asked her to stop.

there had been a complaint.

Billygoat

Europe laughed itself silly over the Janet Jackson tit-exposure thingy. A nation whipping itself into a frenzy over maybe some kids sort-of seeing a titty, when the self-same parents typically allow the self-same children to watch one violent act after another on TV; a typical American child will have see TENS of thousand s of acts of violence on TV by the time they leave home. Which is worse, a kid being exposed to a culture of violence where blowing someone's brains out is cool and glamourous or a kid seeing a tit sometimes. I think we BOTH know what the answer to that is.

Abaddon, I agree that the Janet Jackson thing was really overblown. But I have to say that media really pushed those protesters, which made it seem worse than it really was. I honestly don't think it was that big of a deal. I have many Christian friends (Baptist) that thought it was ridiculous that it got that much attention. The media made it seem like America is full of puritanical prudes, when I don't think that's the case at all. The percentage of those people are in the minority.

In the South of France in 90 degrees of heat it is SO nice not to bother with clothes

90 degrees? Ya bunch of wussies. Here in Texas, we'll go for two months straight in the summer when it's over 100. We're lucky if the temperature goes below 90 in the late evening!

I swear less men will stare at your tits round the pool in a naturist resort than if you had a bikini on round a normal hotel pool - funny, eh?

I imagine it's because men are imagining what's under the bikini, when it's hanging out for all to see it takes that away. What's the fun in imagining when it's in your point of view all day? I don't want you to think I'm a prude when I say that I just don't want to see a naked breast hanging out at a restaurant. It has nothing to do with sexuality. I guess it has more to do with nakedness. Some women just do not have pretty breasts to look at. And if the mother practically has it laying on the table for her child to suckle, it's just not appetizing to me. Perhaps if it were a beautiful breast I'd have a different opinion. I think it all comes down to courtesy going both ways. In spite of the fact that I don't like boobs at a restaurant, I am not offended by a woman breastfeeding in public and would never call the cops on her. But on the same token, I would hope that the mother has enough courtesy for the public around her to know to cover up as much as etiquette in that situation would call for. I don't see why balance on both sides of the issue are that difficult. Andi

17

THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU!

by cyber-sista in

jw
friends

aloha friends,

still working on my process of separating from the org.

so far i have found it best to have little to no contact with anyone who is still living in jw land, as their state of denial is so disturbing to me.

Billygoat

((((Cyber-sista)))))

Aloha back! I find it interesting that so many JWs will NEVER believe you if you mention a bad experience with the Organization. But if you were at work and mentioned a bad thing about your boss or a coworker or even another sister in the hall, they eat it up.

*shaking head*

I just can't believe I used to think this was all normal. Blech.

Andi

29

Why Christianity is all about judgement!

by free2beme in

jw
friends

this joke was written by the comedian emo phillips.

what makes it funny is that it captures christianity to the exact point we all should know.

enjoy .... voted the funniest religious joke of all time.

Billygoat

(From the 'hoping Billygoat doesn't hate my guts now' class)

Absolutely not!!! You're one of my favorite people on this board.

I just know that I made similar statements as an exiting JW for years. But I hadn't stepped foot into one church outside of the Kingdom Hall. I guess I am sensitive to the fact that many JWs speak opinion or statements with no facts or experience to back them up. Sometimes that habit doesn't disappear once the exit has taken place. Not pointing fingers...just trying to clarify.

Andi

29

Why Christianity is all about judgement!

by free2beme in

jw
friends

this joke was written by the comedian emo phillips.

what makes it funny is that it captures christianity to the exact point we all should know.

enjoy .... voted the funniest religious joke of all time.

Billygoat

Some of the most blatant racism takes place in Christian churches ... they are often some of the most segregated (racially, financially, and socially) than many other places.

itis,

How many Christian churches have you attended well enough to make this statement? I'm not asking out of arrogance. I ask because many exJW make statements like this based upon not very well-educated heresay or because of what the Watchtower has told them for years.

Andi