I'm not on the board much these days, but wanted to pop in to give you a big hug Crumpet. You are courageous and strong. Know that you are loved and that you have the support of so many here who care for you.
tall penguin
Thats really sweet of you TP - thank you. I gather a lot of my fledgling courage here you know!
Throughout the last 5 years I have suffered depression on and off, I have taken medication for it but was left feeling nothing, numb all the time which was great at the start but in the end I felt I would rather feel upset or angry or happy than feel nothing.
(((Es))) I can totally relate to that - I dont want to be "un"comfortably numb either! Cbyerdene - you have been a great help and example to me. Um only tell our "mutual friend" if you really think the knowledge will be useful. DB - I said it further up but in case you missed it - your help has been incredible. Talk about "food" at the proper time! You are faithful and discreet! Marius - you are funny - trust you to see the happy pill side!
i went to a festival on the week-end and i saw a few jw's there.
some saw me and said hello, while others looked away when they saw me.. sometimes, i have only a fraction of a second to decide how i'll react.
either i say hello first, or wait for them to say hello, knowing that they might shun me and won't even bother saying hello in return, like one did this week end.. i'm pretty good at knowing who will shun me now.....
Guest with questions - that is so freaking funny - I have to figure out a way of printing that out for my desk at work as it will make me smile during this tricky stressful days.
That would indeed be true martyrdom. And who knows given that you did it to save their lives maybe under the warped constitution of the organisation that is the New World Translation maybe you would get a ressurection. Religion is all f**ked up so the more violent and freaky the scenario the better it fits in my opinion.
And um no since I dont believe there is an afterlife I have never considered taking anyone with me.
so, simply put, i am in love... and love makes a man do some really stupid things.... love makes a pretty damn intelligent man feel pretty damn stupid quite often as well... so here's my story... i have been dating this girl for almost a year now... she is beautiful, sweet, and really just everything i imagined in a life mate... she lives with me... she doesnt work, while i do full time, and also go to school... i make very good money, so that does not bother me... but heres where it all begins... a few months ago, she went to cuba with her sisters, and imoved her into my place while she was gone, her idea, not mine.. now we keep our condoms in a certain place.... anyways, her box of condoms was gone, with her... when she comes back, our little box of condoms is empty.... instead of asking her about it, i explained it to myself as she must have given them to her sister.... .
while i am gone at work, i usually give her a call on my breaks... i notice that she never answers the phone between 6-8 pm.. home or cell... her explanation is that she is always in the shower... the problem with that is that she is always coming out of the shower when i get home.... i get home at around nine... so either she is taking a 3 hour shower or she is taking two showers a night..... she disappears off the face of the earth everytime she goes home to visit her family... like shes not home, shes not answering her phone and only ever calls me when she is in her car....her explanation is that she is at a cousins house.. conveniently, one that i do not know..... last night she went to a wedding... it was over at 11, i know this because she had told me, nd a friend of mine tht was there said that it ended then,,, it was a dry wedding, no dancing... very religious people... i was supposed to meet her at 130 today, i got to the train station that she was coming to, 15 minutes early and waited over an hour there... finally as i decied to walk back home, she gives me a call... i will be home at 5, meet me at the train.... of course, i have been calling her since last night at 11 to tell her i would meet her at 130 as she had planned... i made brunch for her, which is now in the garbage... i was scared shitless she had been hit by a car or dead since her phone has been off since last night.... i asked her why she is so late, i was helping move things until 3am last night... bull shit.. all the gifts were given prior to the weding and the bride and groom had already moved into their new place.... i know because she has told me in the past.....her phone was dead according to her... but all of the sudden, she is able to use it.... no charger, but she can use it..... i did confront her once, and she exploded on me!!!!
like screamed and screamed and said she was insulted i even asked... textbook defensive behaviour right????.
If you want evidence you could just come home from work early. Sounds like she has way too much time on her hands this girl. Next time pick a girl who has her own goals, career, education going on and she wont have time to be cheating plus you will both be on the same page and able to respect each other.
If in doubt you could just call in "Cheaters", that way you save half of America getting involved with her if she is messing you about. If she isnt messing you about then she'll never know. They'll just call and tell you there isnt anything happening.
Can I just ask this isnt the same girl that just upped and left you with no explanation about 6 months ago is it? I'm guessing it is and I think you have been way too tolerant already.
_______
Editted to say: Sorry I just realised you are in Canada and you may not have such ahem quality programes like Cheaters there.
i wonder what a jehovah's witness flow chart would go like to see what kind of witness you are dealing with, where you are in a debate, giving you some idea of how to go about approaching things with them if at all.
it would be really cool if someone made one and uploaded for people to use.. the real reason i made this topic now.... latest watchtower library version?.
You are very kind to be so supportive DJK, Dedpoet and Brinjen! What lovely people there are here.
One person I have to thank extra specially and havent done so publically is DIAMONDBLUE who has given me the benefit of his experience and time in a most invaluable way and enabled me to keep it together when I really was losing it big time. I owe you big time!
Tij
sometimes they make you feel worse to begin with....so if you are alone and feeling down or suicidal or want to self harm then meds may heighten that desire before they kick in properly.
it doesn't mean that they don't/won't work
This is a good warning for me thank you.
Little Drummer boy thank you for the St John's Wort information. I'll have to take all of it in context and combine all I can glean with the what the doctors have to advise before reaching any conclusions. And please dont worry I cant take it or being told I might actually be worst. Its in my nature to take any reference to my extremism as a compliment. Heaven forbid anyone should accuse me of having a moderate version of everything! I;d be secretly appalled!
Purps - I am so glad your daughter has settled some. I am off to get pregnant immediately! Actually you know whats interesting - it used to be an old wives tale or common sense knowledge that a wild female calmed down when she got pregnant - how interesting it is in this case! Could it perhaps be that its not just giving up the alcohol and late nights but that possibly chemicals in the brain are altered and compensate for the imbalance before pregnancy? Be so good to have more information on this. I take everything you say kindly.
I just came across this in my school books which reflects exactly what I am thinking on the debate for and against complementary and other contemporary treatments. I love that my studying tallies with my outside life right now. It feels as if everything is meant to be just as it is.
Medicine Through The Ages
Patient to Healer: I have an ear ache.
Healer in 2000 BC: Eat this root.
Healer in 1000 AD: That root is heathen medicine. Say this prayer.
Healer in 1850 AD: That prayer is supersitition. Drink this potion.
Healer in 1940 AD: That potion is snake oil. Swallow this pill.
Healer in 2000 AD: That pill is artificial. Eat this root.
(Adapted by the Open University from New Scientist 6 September 1997)
much of what we do on a daily basis is routine and of no particular, earth-shaking importance.
however, after reviewing letters of family going back to wwii, it is fascinating to read what dad was doing on board the aircraft carrier in the pacific on any old day, what mom was cooking on her ever-steaming range, how i was dealing with the roller coaster of emotion at bethel [mom saved all my letters], how nana wrote that she would not study with the witnesses [per my request] but 'here are some mittens i knitted for you when you canvass new york with your magazines.
Thanks for the condolences on the sad demise of Ant and Dec, Coco, Troubled Mind and Bumble Bee. Cat is swimming about and looking lively but lonely. She doesnt seem to be able to eat though. She clearly wants to but she keeps spitting the food out even though its the same brand as they always had. So I might try some grain food instead of flakes tomorrow.
Everytime I come into the kitchen he paces in front of the tank and then splashes.
Yeah my three would come to the front of the tank as soon as I came into the kitchen and do sucky sounds until I fed them. sigh.
Thanks Bluebell and Mastodon. I have already informed my employer as they are giving me a very hard time at the moment and I believe are trying to bully me into leaving. I am firmly against bullying wherever it happens so I won't give in to that even though the stress of this added pressure is of course causing me to 'cycle' faster.
And as for telling the people closest to me about my condition...well I just did. This thread. I've withdrawn from or scared everyone else away that used to be close.
