first of all, i am not a jw and i never will be, for my own reasons that i need not discuss further.
however, i have a brother who is a jw and there is a serious problem that he is struggling with, which pertains to his horrible marriage, abusive wife, divorce and being "kicked out" of jw as a member... or whatever jw's call it.
he has been married to a woman for 22 years.
Xena,
I didn't say that the topic was any less important. I said that fleaman's written comments and tone were not as harsh as Flower's. Please don't keep taking offense about the eating disorder thread. I have some issues of my own about that one, even though I am a man.
For argument's sake lets say both fleaman and Flower were both equally right and wrong in what they said. Fleaman showed some character and apologized. Flower has not. If/when she does I will give her the same credit.
Brad
first of all, i am not a jw and i never will be, for my own reasons that i need not discuss further.
however, i have a brother who is a jw and there is a serious problem that he is struggling with, which pertains to his horrible marriage, abusive wife, divorce and being "kicked out" of jw as a member... or whatever jw's call it.
he has been married to a woman for 22 years.
Xena,
I am firmly planted on the ground. No high horse anywhere in sight. I admitted that fleaman was short and terse when he gave his advice and he admitted it. I still don't think it was as nasty as Flower for example but I did say that he said it harshly. Please go back and read it if you think I am on a high horse.
On top of that, why don't you encourage Flower to just own up to her actions instead of venting at me for your pre-conceived idea that I am not in agreement with you about fleaman. I was and am in a greement with you about his "fridge" comments. I also respect him for coming forward and recognizing his "error".
Brad
first of all, i am not a jw and i never will be, for my own reasons that i need not discuss further.
however, i have a brother who is a jw and there is a serious problem that he is struggling with, which pertains to his horrible marriage, abusive wife, divorce and being "kicked out" of jw as a member... or whatever jw's call it.
he has been married to a woman for 22 years.
Flower,
Your opinion of me means nothing to me since you base it purely on a situation which you really know nothing about.
If you think me calling some one who does something stupid stupid makes me the most insensitive person on this board then thats based on your ignorance of the situation since youve only been here a couple months.
I kind of figured you wouldn't really care about my opinion of you. You don't seem to care about your reaction to other people either, so at least you're consistent.
I have not only been on here a couple of months either. I'm not judging you for not knowing that, even though I have mentioned it a few times in posts. (I lost my other password since I registered a couple of years ago and switched internet providers in between so I couldn't get it emailed to me.)
So, reality is that I have made these assessments after having observed for a much longer time than "a couple of months".
Over on slippy's, even though Brummie wasn't nearly as short and terse as you, he apologized to "Peter". The respectable thing would be to do the same, if you haven't yet.
Brad
Edited to add: By the way flower, you make the comment that I am basing my opinion on something that I know nothing about. Go back to slippy's to see how Dave called "Peter" and found out that his story was in fact accurate. Since I was "stupid" enough to believe him, my opinion of you must be based on something that I DO know something about. It was you would judged wrongly. teehee
first of all, i am not a jw and i never will be, for my own reasons that i need not discuss further.
however, i have a brother who is a jw and there is a serious problem that he is struggling with, which pertains to his horrible marriage, abusive wife, divorce and being "kicked out" of jw as a member... or whatever jw's call it.
he has been married to a woman for 22 years.
Flower,
My goodness, such hostility there. You said this to him on slippy's.
sorry to be harsh but all i see here is colossal stupidity. my advice would be to get yourself and your brother a personal advisor. someone to make all of your life decisions for you.
You said this here:
He hasnt proven anything and no one believes him or cares. However giving him the benefit of the doubt he could be either telling the truth, in which case he and his brother are both incredibly stupid, or mentally retarted in which case I have already offered my apologies.
Flower,
I suppose you have never been responsible for putting yourself in an abusive situation? How long were you a JW for? Are you as hard on yourself for doing so?
Most people tend to be slightly sympathetic to the victim. Quite often the victim does not see the abuse as clearly as others do?
You seem to be one of the most insensitive people on this board. Please don't give any of your abused friends any advice.
Brad
first of all, i am not a jw and i never will be, for my own reasons that i need not discuss further.
however, i have a brother who is a jw and there is a serious problem that he is struggling with, which pertains to his horrible marriage, abusive wife, divorce and being "kicked out" of jw as a member... or whatever jw's call it.
he has been married to a woman for 22 years.
Brummie,
I read the whole thread over at slippy's. The end result was that everybody now believes "Peter" but resorted to calling him stupid for the way that he proved it. I have never been to that website before... to be honest I don't whether I will go back. People like Apprentice, Boa, and Flower were extremely rude and insensitive. I agree that "Peter" got angry too, but isn't it better to trust somebody first? The last time I checked I didn't see any apologies yet. Instead they seem to feel justified believing that he is just now "stupid".
I posted part of my story there, which also includes staying with an abusive woman. Apprentice said that he doubted the story because the man is the head of the household in JWland and that he is a man, so he should have been able to intimidate his wife into "submission".
I for one feel for "Peter" and his brother and I have very little respect left for these three listed above. I can get it back if they make amends but I haven't seen it yet.
Brad
did you ever go out on the service christmas day.
i always refused to, i mean even sinners deserved a day off from us calling.lol seriously i was too embarressed to.
my husband got "forced" one year and said never again.
I grew up in Timmins, Ontario, Canada. We rented an arena there Christmas Day for the whole day. We played hockey, broomball, ringette, etc. all day. It was great!! Some of you guys went out in service on Christams Day? OUCH!! That would really suck, for you and the homeowner." Bummer!
Brad
.
.
-----------someone was going to an assembly to picket, and asked you to write an slogan which would really make a witness think or question what would you write?
i was a jw for 40 years and all i got is this lousy sign.candidlynuts, Another great one. I love it. Brad
i am really tired of waiting for the other side of armageddon to feel better.
i have'nt felt very well for years, with fibromyalgia and depression and other things.
my friend who is a baptised jw tells me the only way we will ever feel any better is to wait for the other side of armageddon.
Beth,
I agree with your choice to cure yourself naturally rather than waiting for Armageddon. A wise choice indeed.
Even our mental outlook on life can make such a great improvement in our energy etc. So, you're going the right way with that one too.
Brad
first of all, i am not a jw and i never will be, for my own reasons that i need not discuss further.
however, i have a brother who is a jw and there is a serious problem that he is struggling with, which pertains to his horrible marriage, abusive wife, divorce and being "kicked out" of jw as a member... or whatever jw's call it.
he has been married to a woman for 22 years.
Satanus,
Why would peter have such a high iq, and his brother be so stupid?I hope eman doesn't jump all over me for this, but I have a high IQ as well and I had people asking why I was so stupid to stay with my abusive ex for so many years. Intelligence, on an IQ scale, has very little to do with how "smartly" someone deals with life in general.S
I try to explain it as, "I'm intelligent. I'm just not very smart." I think that may be what Peter meant when he said it's good and bad. Eman, What you were referring to about Peter, is it the "going over to Slippy's", (whatever that is) that Wednesday was talking about? I can be a little more naive than some people but I also hope that Peter, if he is genuine, did not think that he was getting any good advice here by being falsely accused of being a troll or whatever by others. Brad
i have followed mario's tragic story from the beginning.
especially in this last battle he is in i have respected very much all your advice to him, especially xandria, who seems to have people at her availability with a lot of experience in this field.. mario is certainly dealing with it very well.
what i liked mostly about all your advice regarding marina is that you encouraged him to keep control of marina legally but also let her believe she has freedom to do what she wants right now.
Narkissos,
Thanks for the reply. You have a very good way of putting things even when you say you don't have much advice to give.
For instance, whatever has already been decided in court (such as visit rights, no KH, staying in the same school) you probably can have enforced by law, without asking the children what they want. Better this way imho.
Unfortunately I have not been able enforce it by law, YET!!! I am asking for a "police enforcement order" to be made because it seems like my ex will not do what's best for the children unless her doing the opposite has strong negative consequences. For example, my oldest son has not come to my house for a weekend visit since before June 22, 2004. He has come for some Wednesday visits (not overnight) and we have had a great time. He has said "I want to come this weekend, dad, but maybe for just one night to start."
But by the time the weekend comes around he says he hates me and doesn't want to come. Without even saying to her about the fact that I know it is their negative manipulation that has caused his "change of heart", I have pleaded with her to encourage him to come. She doesn't. She thinks I ruined my relationship with him and wants it left like that. Even if that were true, a sensible mother would let her ex fix the "problem, for the sake of her child. (Solomon principle again). So after much pleading I filed a "Notice of Contempt Motion". Rather than adjusting her/her family's behaviour (which is all I REALLY want), they accused me of physically abusing my oldest son.
I absolutely and completely agree with you and other people's belief that the children should not be in the middle. That's why I left her... she couldn't be a reasonable person in any conversations and would yell at me and throw things at me in front of the children. I keep them as far away from that as possible.
When they come to me and ask why I took the house from mommy (not reality) I leave mommy's lies out of it and stress that they have a nice place to live at mommy's and they have a nice place at daddy's right? That's what mommy and daddy want for you guys... is to be happy and be safe.
I think my ex is bi-polar too. There is something imbalanced in her for sure. That's why I am trying to fix things within the Courtroom, not anywhere else. She doesn't necessarily realize how "crazy" she is being. I mean, when we first split up she accused me of everything under the sun. I admitted to being a PART of arguments years ago and this is why we wanted to separate.... irreconcilable differences. For her part, she accepted NO PART whatsover in any disagreement that we ever had in our relationship. that's just delusional.
Any further advice is still greatly appreciated.
Brad
