Peacepipe and Trumind,
If in the organization is where you need to be, then nothing can stop you. But please, please be so VERY VERY sure it's right for you. As the poster said above, there is NO HONORABLE WAY OUT.
Yes, the anger is hard to read sometimes. It's really fear and hurt. There is so much pain. Sometimes we are still like little children who've been abused, saying "it wasn't fair-IT WASN'T FAIR--WHY?!?!" Some of us (I'd venture to say MANY of us) were literally physically abused in the name of "bible principals", and still carry a lot of pain. Please just take what you need, leave the rest. Allow others to use whatever means they need to heal. Sometimes it was years or lifetimes of choking down pain, serious depression, putting on a happy face, not showing or even uttering your real feelings because "Jehovah's people are the happiest people on earth". You are allowed ALOT of leniency before you are baptized. ALOT. That is why, you'll notice, even the "brothers" when they question you both at the questioning sessions, and right before emmersion ask questions in such a way that you and they MAKE SURE THIS IS YOUR DECISION--THAT YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GETTING INTO. But often times, you do not. And peacepipe, you said quote: "I began a study with someone whom I now feel is a very dear friend." If she is a "good witness" she will not be your friend, if you get baptized and are disfellowshipped or question anything about the org. Most everyone here has lost friends and family (mothers who won't even acknowledge grandchildren--that's how powerful the influence of the organization is--if you're a mother, can you imagine?)Maybe you're sure that will never happen/maybe it never would. Just go in KNOWING what you're getting into. You'll know if it's right. It's like a bride going to the alter: you've invested time in this relationship, maybe your parents, friends, etc. love this person, your parents have spent alot of money on the wedding and the church is filling up with guests but your gut tells you NO, DON'T DO THIS! Listen to that inner voice. Too much is at stake.
Love,
B. :)
whatever you decide, please know that this is a place where you can always always speak your heart.
Bridgette
JoinedPosts by Bridgette
-
40
Rookie on the Field
by peacepipe ini've been reading this forum page for about a year.
at first i thought it was a meeting place for practicing jw's but after reading many posts found that most people here have been hurt or don't see things eye to eye with the wt org.
i am not a jw but i have been associating with them for about 3 yrs.
-
-
Bridgette
-
86
More Bethelite Table Crumbs Please!
by MadApostate inin a controversial post in a separate thread, janh makes an extremely good observation that a certain former gb member will likely carry many, many wts "top secrets" to his grave, for whatever reasons he does not wish to divulge such.. then, on this db, former bethelites constantly exchange posts where their word choice is "cloaked" so that many of us who were not insiders are left guessing at meaning, people, etc.
obviously, even individual members of this fraternity have unique experiences and insights.
if such info is not disseminated, it is lost if that person dies naturally or in an accident.. would you folks please post more elaborately so that the rest of us can benefit from your knowledge and experience.. the statement that motivated this post made a silent reference to the author of the happiness book.
-
-
Bridgette
Well, I didn't read all of this thread, so I hope I'm not parroting anything else. What I see here is a reflection of a lot of pain, manifesting itself as anger. Someone wrote in another thread, sometime ago, that we are all like abused children when we come out of the ORG. I think we're all just in a lot of pain. Clicks were a huge issue with those of us who didn't "fit the mold" of perfect JWs (REJOICE in that!). Call me crazy but, even though I couldn't read through all the mudslinging, I'M SO GLAD WE CAN "TALK" LIKE THIS NOW!!! Remember the old days, when you had an issue, and you'd just have to choke it down? Internalize? Get ulcers? Medicate your pain?
THIS IS GREAT!! We're HUMAN AGAIN!!! We can have different opinions, we can express anger, hurt, etc. Just don't hurt anyone. I'd hate to see anyone stop posting here. We all have something vital to contribute and glean.
B. :) (waiting for someone to tell me to take my psycho-fluff and F-off!) hehehehe -
7
SATAN the DEVIL
by Amazing inin fairness to god, i thought it was time that we focus in the devil a minute.
that sounds rather odd.
what has satan done, at least assuming he is more than a myth, and that the bible record is accurate.
-
-
Bridgette
Has anyone here ever read anything about Zoroastrianism? It's a very ancient belief system (rivaling or maybe even predating Judaica--I'll have to read some more) but they introduced the idea that there is a "head hauncho" god, who gets questioned by one of the lesser gods, and thus, a whole psycho drama is played out on who's right. I'll have to read more. I ran across it on the beliefnet.com site under Zoroastrianism. They also came up with a story about a son god who helped redeem mankind. And don't even get me started on the Cannanite god, EL--who got homogenized by Abraham's crew into Elo-him. Or the agricultural Goddess of some of the tribes around Abraham who's symbol was a serpent, (fruit, serpent, woman = bad) and archeologists think they wanted to villify this Goddess by designing the myth of eve and the forbidden fruit.
*sigh* "there is nothing new under the sun" or so I read somewhere....
:)
B. -
10
Mothers Rules for Everlasting Life
by Stacey injust a little something that i wrote for a writing class that i was taking last year.
and really, they are not my rules.
therefore we must follow what the organization says and not celebrate our birthday.
-
-
Bridgette
AAAAHHHH, the good old days! Going to school in a small back-asswords little Texas town, the only witness kid ever to attend----terrified (TERRIFIED) having to sit through the pledge. Stuck between Jehovah's wrath and a room full of rednecks! Thanks for making my first day of school as a tiny little girl so GREAT, Mom. Ah well, no regrets, it made me stronger and determined not to raise my daughter that way. She LOVES school and life!!
B. :)
p.s. I love Texas and all Texans (being one myself) but this when I say back-asswards, I mean back-asswards, about 500 people in the whole town--they didn't even allow blacks, much less someone who CHOSE to be differnt. -
7
SATAN the DEVIL
by Amazing inin fairness to god, i thought it was time that we focus in the devil a minute.
that sounds rather odd.
what has satan done, at least assuming he is more than a myth, and that the bible record is accurate.
-
-
Bridgette
Well, if he were real (which, I realize to many here, he is, and I disparage NO ONE'S beliefs), as has been posted by DC's Ghost, he is the best friend the christian church has ever had. He's the baddy/Jehovah's the goody. He keeps everybody in business.
B. :)
p.s. and "he" makes a great scape goat, so people don't have to take as much personal responsibility for their actions. -
38
Irate email
by D wiltshire inbelow is a email i received today.
the person doen't know me except from i think randy watter web site where i post my appeal letter to the body of elders on which i left my email address.
i never told her i wasn't df but she gets facts confussed alot.. anyway i sent the post on barbra anderson from our site to her you might find it interesting so i'm posting it below.. .
-
-
Bridgette
Someone please hand that woman a napkin so that she may dab the spittle and foam from her mouth.
Seriously, though it's so sad: those two e-mails (the one to D Wiltshire and Chuck D) reflect some very unquiet souls. VERY disturbed. May they have peace. That WOULD be a fruit of the spirit. So, does that mean I have the spirit? things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmm.......
Love,
B. :) -
51
satanism, witchcraft and devil worship. . . . . .
by DCs Ghost incontrary to popular belief and what society and the media will portray satanism, devil worship and witchcraft are 3 very independent systems of belief, .
sure, to those who are afraid of looking into books dealing with the occult, for fear of being possessed or what have you, i write this as a vent because it makes me laugh when i hear people assume that the three are the same, they aren't, .
and the reality is that even though the three get bunched up as the same, many times it is the ignorance of the practitioners which keeps the ignorance alive.
-
-
Bridgette
Gently Feral,
WOW!! Thank you. I've just visited the link you set me........
WOW!!
Love and blessings,
B. :)and to Claudia,
Well, I'm not dc, and I'm sure his path varies slightly from mine, but I'd like to try to address some of your questions from my POV. My mother is still in the ORG, so I only allude to my beliefs. She knows that I and my daughter are much happier and stronger than we have EVER been in our lives. And that I finally got the courage to leave an abusive marriage (both to me and my daughter--guess how seriously the elders would take it? not at all) I have never made my exit from the ORG official because of her. She's not exactly a pillar of the cong and she and my dad are divorced and she would be ALL ALONE. She has no retirement, no health insurance, etc. (thanks in part to the ORG's dogma). She was very abusive to me growing up (mainly because of her "bible trained conscience") but I love her very much and the further she drifts from the ORG (she'll never leave, but she drifts) she has calmed down ALOT!
As far as you're being burned out on spirituality and religion--can't blame you there!! If you're not feeling any pull towards a particular path, then you're right where you need to be. It's kind of nice, actually--just being, isn't it? I love spending Sunday mornings in bed with my husband (NEW), reading the paper, drinking coffee, snuggling.....instead of dashing about madly trying to get ready for another meeting. -
51
satanism, witchcraft and devil worship. . . . . .
by DCs Ghost incontrary to popular belief and what society and the media will portray satanism, devil worship and witchcraft are 3 very independent systems of belief, .
sure, to those who are afraid of looking into books dealing with the occult, for fear of being possessed or what have you, i write this as a vent because it makes me laugh when i hear people assume that the three are the same, they aren't, .
and the reality is that even though the three get bunched up as the same, many times it is the ignorance of the practitioners which keeps the ignorance alive.
-
-
Bridgette
My story: the novel...
will try to be brief
I, too was born in 1970, and my mother, at a real low, lonely spot in her life was snagged in the door to door work when I was 1. My dad soon converted from atheism and even did a brief stint as an elder, but always a free thinker, and an engineer with a formal education, shortly after 1975, said "thanks but, no more." The only thing he would say, is that he saw too much.
When I was 28 I moved away from a small town chock full of dubs in Southern NM and landed here in Denver--aaaahhhh, civilization! I just left. I didn't necessarily leave mad, I just left. Nothing resonated. I had always been taught (by the FDS) to judge those who hold themselves out as THE ONLY SPOKESPERSONS OF GOD, very harshly--and "mene, mene tekel parson" --they had been weighed with the scales they gave me, and guess what?
Having inherited my father's logic, I assumed there is no god, and still say no one really knows more about the unknown than anyone else. I started reading a lot! I read "women who run with the wolves" (Don't laugh--ok, chuckle) But it really resonated with me. I started to get back some of my suppressed intuition/psychic abilities. One day I was talking to a co-worker and I just got this blurb in my head: Merry Meet/Blessed Be. I blurted out: do you do ritual? She said "why would you ask me that?" Yep, she's a witch. She has really helped me in my path. She never knocked on my door, prosyletized, or informal witnessed--didn't need to. I have never been initiated. I steer away from Covens--too formal for my liking. I opt for a solitary path. But I REALLY connect with the feminine energy of the universe. Ritual and Magick are cool, and have done a lot for me, but I dig the DEEPLY spiritual side of it all. When I actually "feel" and see the presence of Goddess I am more alive than I've ever been. It is PURE LOVE/ PURE ENERGY.
Oh, sorry for the novel. Just one more thing, how's this for irony: my mother's spiritual birthday is October 31 (as in she was baptized). Guess what my first Sabbat was? hehehehehe.....
B. :) hoping there are others like us..... -
3
Gotta go
by ReverendRoy inthank all of you the have allowed me to share in your experiences and life.
this forum has provided me with some healing of wounds that happened a long time ago and had not healed yet.
thank those that allowed me to participate with some not so readily acceptable posts that you may not believed.
-
-
Bridgette
Dear Rev,
Well, I'm just sorry that I have not been around here long enough to read enough of your posts. I understand about following your path. And about those conversations with god--your quip at the bottom of each posting--love it!
Do drop us a line now and then.
B. :) -
51
satanism, witchcraft and devil worship. . . . . .
by DCs Ghost incontrary to popular belief and what society and the media will portray satanism, devil worship and witchcraft are 3 very independent systems of belief, .
sure, to those who are afraid of looking into books dealing with the occult, for fear of being possessed or what have you, i write this as a vent because it makes me laugh when i hear people assume that the three are the same, they aren't, .
and the reality is that even though the three get bunched up as the same, many times it is the ignorance of the practitioners which keeps the ignorance alive.
-
-
Bridgette
<<they never knew my history with the dubs>>
What was your history with the dubs?
As I'd mused earlier in this thread, I wonder if there are others like me? That is, born and raised in the Borg, but being a child of nature? It seems most go onto other confining judeo-christian beliefs, or total skepticism (which, skepticism is VERY good and useful--we must question EVERYTHING-ALWAYS in order to progress individually and collectively). But my "beliefs" are anything BUT judeo-christian, and I always wonder if there are others.
B. :)