Posts by Check_Your

40

How do female "unbelieving mates" do it? My tribute!

by Check_Your_Premises in

i am a male ubm, aka "unbelieving mate", which is hard enough.

i hate seeing my wife, someone who i have the utmost respect for, humiliating herself through her enslavement to this silly man-made publishing company.

i hate seeing her become a drone.

Check_Your_Premises

PS: CYP ... you get bonus points for using the term "cock-block" in a serious thread. Kudos to you!

heh heh.

A while back someone (Terry I think) asked us to describe ourselves in two words.

Mine was "Serious Irreverance"

40

How do female "unbelieving mates" do it? My tribute!

by Check_Your_Premises in

i am a male ubm, aka "unbelieving mate", which is hard enough.

i hate seeing my wife, someone who i have the utmost respect for, humiliating herself through her enslavement to this silly man-made publishing company.

i hate seeing her become a drone.

And the other thing to ask him Carla, is even if you are "bad" for not following him, does that mean he has no obligation as your husband to try to lessen any consequences (for instance loss of family time) that are incurred by him doing the "good" thing?

It does not! Morality is choosing between right and wrong. Reality is dealing with consequences of actions, which is costs vs. benefits. They are not the same thing!

I hate that jw attitude!

"I am doing the right thing here, so if it ruins everything you worked your whole life for that is to bad, because I am right and you are wrong for not joining also!"

40

How do female "unbelieving mates" do it? My tribute!

by Check_Your_Premises in

i am a male ubm, aka "unbelieving mate", which is hard enough.

i hate seeing my wife, someone who i have the utmost respect for, humiliating herself through her enslavement to this silly man-made publishing company.

i hate seeing her become a drone.

Check_Your_Premises

Carla,

Yeah, I got that one to. I was able to relate it to an experience early in our marriage. I was finishing our basement so we could sell the house before interest rates rose. It really took up most of my time (and incidentally this is the distraction that helped keep me from seeing the JW freight train headed my way).

Anyway, I asked her why she didn't hang out with me when I was working. The obvious answer was that it wasn't hainging out. She would have been sitting there watching me cuss and work. I paralelled that to the KH experience. It is not like I get to talk to her or look at her. I mostly just end up wrestling with my bored toddler the whole time. NOt my idea of quality family time.

I would rather go fishing together!

CYP

40

How do female "unbelieving mates" do it? My tribute!

by Check_Your_Premises in

i am a male ubm, aka "unbelieving mate", which is hard enough.

i hate seeing my wife, someone who i have the utmost respect for, humiliating herself through her enslavement to this silly man-made publishing company.

i hate seeing her become a drone.

Check_Your_Premises

Well besides wanting to compliment, I also was hoping that this thread would draw some sound advice for other female ubm's. In particular, what are the ways to get over the betrayal and anger, to the point where you can affect changes in your husband's perspective without raising the spectre of the dreaded and evil opposer spouse.

Thoughts?

40

How do female "unbelieving mates" do it? My tribute!

by Check_Your_Premises in

i am a male ubm, aka "unbelieving mate", which is hard enough.

i hate seeing my wife, someone who i have the utmost respect for, humiliating herself through her enslavement to this silly man-made publishing company.

i hate seeing her become a drone.

Check_Your_Premises

It doesn't hurt to be the breadwinner

Money does indeed talk doesn't it. That other stuff walks.

There is a tip for some of you ladies. Start bringing in some cash! (I just love waving magic wands)

Whenever someone talks about how unimportant money is to them, I always chuckle inside at the thought of their claim being put to the test.

40

How do female "unbelieving mates" do it? My tribute!

by Check_Your_Premises in

i am a male ubm, aka "unbelieving mate", which is hard enough.

i hate seeing my wife, someone who i have the utmost respect for, humiliating herself through her enslavement to this silly man-made publishing company.

i hate seeing her become a drone.

Check_Your_Premises

I am a male ubm, aka "unbelieving mate", which is hard enough. I hate seeing my wife, someone who I have the utmost respect for, humiliating herself through her enslavement to this silly man-made publishing company. I hate seeing her become a drone. I hate how much time and resources this completely pointless little detour is taking from our lives.

Many have realized that in a sense, the experience of the ubm is one of infidelity. You went into your marriage making a formal commitment to your spouse. In the midst of that commitment, your spouse made another, binding commitment that takes priority over the one you made.

But as many know, infidelity cuts different for men than for women. For a man, the worst part of infidelity is the idea of another man sleeping with their wife. For a woman, the worst part is the idea of another woman having a closer relationship with their man. That is not to say that those aspects of infidelity do not also bother men and women, I am only saying that these are the aspects that bother each particular gender the most. ( in general... I know everyone is different.... so please don't yell at me telling me how you are different.... you know what I mean you argumentative butt-hole!) Sorry. Just anticipating the nitpickers.

So for me, it is awful to be a ubm. But I have actually thought to myself, "At least I am the one sleeping with her". Because the infidelity is one that is easier for a man to take, I am still able to embrace and tolerate the JW in many ways that help my cause. We all know that getting mad and yelling only reinforces the indoctrination, in that you are fulfilling their description of worldy people, as well as feeding the jw martyr complex. So I am very tolerant of the jw. I keep them very close so I can know and manipulate their ways. Don Corleone said to keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer.

That kind of intimacy with the "other woman" isn't so easy for a female ubm. For her, that would be like me going out for beers with the guy who is banging my wife, just so I can try to cock-block somehow. How pathetic would I feel. That is why it is so difficult for the female ubm. For her it is such an affront to her dignity to be tolerant of "the other woman". How can you expect your spouse to have any respect for you if you are going to put up with crap like that?! But the reality is that our spouses need our help. It takes quite a woman to see past the pain of her betrayal to where she can see her husband as someone in need of help. If we don't help them, who will? But ultimately we only can save ourselves and those who want to be saved. When to get on with our own lives is the haunting question of every ubm.

So how do you do it ladies? How do you get past your anger to the point where you can help him?

I, as a male ubm, also have some other advantages. I am the man. I am the head of the household in the JW world. (In my own, I would never want to make a big decision without getting the opinion of someone as smart as my wife) Nevertheless, it is a card I can play, and play it I do! I am also the primary bread winner. Nobody talks about that one, but everyone sure thinks about it. I would have to be pretty short on options to give an ultimatum, but if I gave one, I have to wonder how much the org would matter if it meant my wife working full time?

So add that all up, and all I can say is that as much as I lament my circumstances and the row I have to hoe, it is nothing compared to you ladies who are trying to save the silly, mind controlled slobs you are married to. They don't deserve you. When you get them out, they owe you alot of jewelry.

Since your husbands are to stupid to say it, I will...

...hats off to you darlin's. You are the best!

CYP

26

What are JW's going to do with their "outdated" Rev book and Dan proph book

by booker-t in

i was just wondering what is going to happen when the leaders at wt headquaters see that the revelation grand climax book and the pay attention to daniel's prophecies book all prove false.

are they going to rewrite both books and call it "new light" and somehow say that they were wrong about the beast of revelation being the un and now the un will be considered holy?

are jw's going to have to praise the un as from jehovah and jesus?

Check_Your_Premises

I think the org is in "HOLD OUT FOR ARMAGEDDON" mode.

They have done this at several points in their history. They wait until just before some dumb event was supposed to occur. They start to hedge their bets. Then they change.

They know much of their doctrine is bunk.

They are hoping the world goes to hell soon so they don't have to fix it all. I think the war on terror, the recent tsunami, and now the leveling of New Orleans have all given them cause for hope.

Methinks if Jesus does really return soon, the org will have some 'splainin to do.

14

"The preaching work would have to be organized"

by Check_Your_Premises in

i think witness often confuse the subject of "organized" or "order" with human concepts of these words.

for instance a forest might look highly random in it's placement of trees.

on the other hand, the trees are placed according to very hard and certain rules that decide where a tree can receive enough water, light, and nutrients to survive.

Check_Your_Premises

I think witness often confuse the subject of "organized" or "order" with human concepts of these words. For instance a forest might look highly random in it's placement of trees. On the other hand, the trees are placed according to very hard and certain rules that decide where a tree can receive enough water, light, and nutrients to survive. Or what of clouds?

The point is that what looks like disorder to a limited human mind, is actually perfectly ordered to a omnipotent being.

Complexity does not equal disorder.

Their textbook example of organized is their preaching work. Everyone walking around, knocking on doors, saying the same thing appears to be ordered. But is it adequate? Is it sufficiently complex? Does it handle the case of the 12 year old girl who has been sold into sexual slavery in the slums of Mumbai. That girl does not need a friggin pamphlet and a study. She needs someone to get her the hell out of there before she is going to be able to take stories of hope and forgiveness seriously. Christ often addressed the physical needs of people without EVER mentioning the spiritual needs. See Matthew 8. There are folks doing that sort of work. They are not witnesses.

So you see a complex job like spreading the word does not require a distant, spiritual politburo to direct all those mindless drones as to how to conduct such an endeavor. Rather it is a grass roots effort that requires the local knowledge, freedom, and perfect guidance that can only come from an all knowing Holy Spirit.

The wt efforts look silly in comparison.

26

There must be an "organization"

by sinis in

i have not, nor will go back to "meetings" after finding out how i was spiritually mislead through the years.i have actually found more comfort in doing my own studying.

my wife still goes occassionaly and her sister and brother-in-law just started going back.

so we went over there house the other night and we got into a conversation in which he said they went to the meeting today (sunday).

Check_Your_Premises

I think witness often confuse the subject of "organized" or "order" with human concepts of these words. For instance a forest might look highly random in it's placement of trees. On the other hand, the trees are placed according to very hard and certain rules that decide where a tree can receive enough water, light, and nutrients to survive. Or what of clouds?

The point is that what looks like disorder to a limited human mind, is actually perfectly ordered to a omnipotent being.

Complexity does not equal disorder.

Their textbook example of organized is their preaching work. Everyone walking around, knocking on doors, saying the same thing appears to be ordered. But is it adequate? Is it sufficiently complex? Does it handle the case of the 12 year old girl who has been sold into sexual slavery in the slums of Mumbai. That girl does not need a friggin pamphlet and a study. She needs someone to get her the hell out of there before she is going to be able to take stories of hope and forgiveness seriously. Christ often addressed the physical needs of people without EVER mentioning the spiritual needs. See Matthew 8. There are folks doing that sort of work. They are not witnesses.

So you see a complex job like spreading the word does not require a distant, spiritual politburo to direct all those mindless drones as to how to conduct such an endeavor. Rather it is a grass roots effort that requires the local knowledge, freedom, and perfect guidance that can only come from an all knowing Holy Spirit.

The wt efforts look silly in comparison.

5

Christian perspective: Anything wrong with designing targeting systems?

by Check_Your_Premises in

jw
friends

just curious what any might think

Check_Your_Premises

Is taking another life not justified in the case of self defense?

So when does righteous self defense become something else?

I have no question if myself or my family was in immediate danger, that I would do everything I could to eliminate that danger.

Now expand that principle to a macro level? If you feel your nation, which is to say your home, which is to say your family are in grave danger? Is there no role for taking of life in righteous self defense?

We must put our faith in God I suppose. But does he expect us to do nothing? I won't look at a man who has broken into my home, and say God will protect me. I will likely figure that he put my pistol in my hand for just that purpose! I don't think God will provide a supernatural event, when practical means are available to us?

Thank you for any thoughts.

Anticipation Alert:

PLEASE DO NOT HIJACK THIS THREAD TO TURN IT INTO A DEBATE ABOUT THE WAR ON TERROR OR THE WAR IN IRAQ. START ANOTHER THREAD IF YOU WISH TO HAVE THAT CONVERSATION.

Check_Your_Premises

Posts by Check_Your_Premises