Posts by BugEye

25

Funnies!

by nicolaou in

jw
friends

seems like so many of us have a good joke or funny story to tell.

i thought it might be a good idea to have somewhere to put them.. nic'.

junior's room.

BugEye

Beer Troubleshooting
********************
SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.
FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.

SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet.
FAULT: Improper bladder control.
ACTION: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training.

SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless.
FAULT:Glass empty.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights.
FAULT:You have fallen over backward.
ACTION: Have yourself lashed to bar.

SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts.
FAULT:You have fallen forward.
ACTION: See above.

SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.
FAULT:Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face.
ACTION: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.

SYMPTOM: Floor blurred.
FAULT:You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.

SYMPTOM: Floor moving.
FAULT:You are being carried out.
ACTION: Find out if you are being taken to another bar.

SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark.
FAULT:Bar has closed.
ACTION: Confirm home address with bartender.

SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures.
FAULT:Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations.
ACTION: Cover mouth.

25

Funnies!

by nicolaou in

jw
friends

seems like so many of us have a good joke or funny story to tell.

i thought it might be a good idea to have somewhere to put them.. nic'.

junior's room.

BugEye

If you are from the northern states and planning on visiting or moving to the South, there are a few things you should know that will help you adapt to the difference in lifestyles:

If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a 12 pack of beer and a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay our of their way. This is what they live for.

Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store. Do not buy food at this store.

Remember, "ya'll" is singular, "all ya'll" is plural, and "all ya'll's" is plural possessive.

Get used to hearing "You ain't from around here, are ya?"

You may hear a Southerner say "Ought!" to a dog or child. This is short for "Ya'll oughta not do that!" and is the equivalent of saying "No!"

Don't be worried at not understanding what people are saying. They can't understand you either.

The first Southern expression to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the adjective "big'ol," as in "big'ol truck" or big'ol boy." Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way. All of them are in denial about it.

The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.

Be advised that "He needed killin" is a valid defense here.

If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, ya'll, watch this," stay out of the way. These are likely to be the last words he'll ever say.

If there is the prediction of the slightest chance of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It doesn't matter whether you need anything or not. You just have to go there.

When you come up on a person driving 15 mph down the middle of the road, remember that most folks learn to drive on a John Deere, and that this is the proper speed and position for that vehicle.

Do not be surprised to find that 10 year olds own their own shotguns and are proficient marksmen. Or that their mammas taught them how to aim.

25

Funnies!

by nicolaou in

jw
friends

seems like so many of us have a good joke or funny story to tell.

i thought it might be a good idea to have somewhere to put them.. nic'.

junior's room.

BugEye

Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym. His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hi, Dave, how's it hangin?"

His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."

When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual - Budweiser. His wife is becoming uncomfortable and says, "You must come here a lot for that woman to know you drink Budweiser".

"No, dear, she's in the Ladies Bowling League. We share lanes with them."

A stripper comes over to their table and throws her arms around Dave.
"Hi Dave," she says, "Want your usual table dance?"

Dave's wife, now furious, storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her and she starts screaming at him. The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave."

25

Funnies!

by nicolaou in

jw
friends

seems like so many of us have a good joke or funny story to tell.

i thought it might be a good idea to have somewhere to put them.. nic'.

junior's room.

BugEye

Q. What's the difference between a nine-months pregnant woman and a
Playboy centerfold?

A. Nothing, if the pregnant woman's husband knows what's good for him.

29

A Message of Hope

by 7robert7 in

jw
friends

it's been a long time since i've visited this site.

the last time that i was here i was not allowed to participate in this forums discussions for as it was explained to me, "you dont share in our beliefs, therefore your comments, ideas, and expressions would cause conflict, and disunity among those of us who do share in the truth.

" the day i recieved the denial, i broke down in tears and prayed that jesus christ would bring down the walls of hatred and mistrust among those here and that he would allow me the blessed opportunity to some day share the joy that i have found in him.

BugEye

Carmel

The reason they jumped into bed with Swaggart Ministries in the
court case was fear of loss.

If they pay tax, or go with the "donation" idea, their power empire
may collapse due to bankruptcy. That is something their pride and
greed for power could not tolerate.

If I am afraid to go bankrupt, does that make me materialistic?
Would it mean that my motivation is "money"?

NO, money is the side issue and although it is tied in, due to the
capitalistic world we live in, it is not the WTBTS aim.

Dave

29

A Message of Hope

by 7robert7 in

jw
friends

it's been a long time since i've visited this site.

the last time that i was here i was not allowed to participate in this forums discussions for as it was explained to me, "you dont share in our beliefs, therefore your comments, ideas, and expressions would cause conflict, and disunity among those of us who do share in the truth.

" the day i recieved the denial, i broke down in tears and prayed that jesus christ would bring down the walls of hatred and mistrust among those here and that he would allow me the blessed opportunity to some day share the joy that i have found in him.

BugEye

Carmel, you missed the point I was making.

Here is an example, I should have given it in the first place.

When reading the lead comment, someone who is doubting, but afraid
to leave the truth may begin to read. They will get to the part where
he said

These are just a few of the many thousands of "stories they
have made up" to expoit their sheep. But why? Nearly $1,000,000,000.00 dollars is why."

And they will say to themselves, "thats not true, the WTBTS is not
like Jimmy Swaggart, the GB doesnt drive around in Rolls Royce's and
I've never heard any evidence that any of them are wealthy."

And here is the point THEY WILL STOP READING AND THINK "THE BROTHERS
ARE RIGHT AND THESE PEOPLE MUST BE APOSTATES AND THEY LIE" and the
opportunity to help someone escape will be lost.

Whether money is needed to keep power over the "flock" or not is
irrellevant. Power is their aim, and money is a tool and a side
issue.

The point is, $1,000,000,000.00 is NOT why they mislead and mistreat
their flock, which the above statement says. Power, control, pride and
haughtiness are the EVIDENT reasons.

By sticking to EVIDENT reasons, we can help others to see the truth
about the WTBTS which I am sure you agree is most important.

Also Carmel, you stated

"Money is a measure of power ...

Yes Money is A measure of power not THE measure of power.

If that were true, then Ghandi was powerless.
Also, If you believe the bible, what about Jesus.
"nowhere to lay his head" but he started a movement that is "followed"
2000 years later and millions regard his words with reverence.

Power but no material wealth.

Sorry, but they are not interchangable.

Dave

15

old, somewhere to go, proud, and fearless

by messenger in

jw
friends

i have done some really bad things that involve kittens and ducks but i do not want to tell you my story, unless you ask, then i will have to refuse.

while i need help and consolation, i hate everyone on this board and will attack anyone that replies to this topic.

please do not try to help me or i will kill myself and it will be your fault.. love,.

BugEye

How deeply this post moved me.
I feel for you and your plight. Dont worry about the kittens, they
are with God now.

I have a suggestion, why dont you try prostitution, you could become
the whore of this board.

Ohh I forgot, someone else has allready volunteered for that.

Anyway, I am sure that you meant well.

Dave

29

A Message of Hope

by 7robert7 in

jw
friends

it's been a long time since i've visited this site.

the last time that i was here i was not allowed to participate in this forums discussions for as it was explained to me, "you dont share in our beliefs, therefore your comments, ideas, and expressions would cause conflict, and disunity among those of us who do share in the truth.

" the day i recieved the denial, i broke down in tears and prayed that jesus christ would bring down the walls of hatred and mistrust among those here and that he would allow me the blessed opportunity to some day share the joy that i have found in him.

BugEye

BTW Logical

I couldnt find those threads you referred to.

Dave

29

A Message of Hope

by 7robert7 in

jw
friends

it's been a long time since i've visited this site.

the last time that i was here i was not allowed to participate in this forums discussions for as it was explained to me, "you dont share in our beliefs, therefore your comments, ideas, and expressions would cause conflict, and disunity among those of us who do share in the truth.

" the day i recieved the denial, i broke down in tears and prayed that jesus christ would bring down the walls of hatred and mistrust among those here and that he would allow me the blessed opportunity to some day share the joy that i have found in him.

BugEye

People commonly treat money and power as though they are interchangable.

This however is an error, for although they are mostly found together,
they are not interchangable.

Ghandi was one of the most powerful men yet he had little wealth.

Bill Gates has the most money in the world, yet although he has power
his power is nowhere near comparable to his wealth.

There is no doubt that the men in Bethel are control "freaks" and
are pharisees by nature, but this does not in any way infer that
money is their motivation. Using this argument simply weakens the
case against them.

Use strong argument and points that are not only verifiable but
pertinent.

Using this argument also introduces complexity where none is
nessesary.

Better still, use the NWT to show that they are not only wrong, but
also ungodly in behaviour.

Sorry for being so adament, but as a scientist, I know all too well
weak and unsubstantiated argument promotes conflict. Where the WTBTS
is concerned, it also allows believers to have loopholes to escape
through.

Although it is wrong, people use the theory that if one bit is right
then it is all right. And if one bit is wrong then it is all wrong.
Giving a weak argument, even in only a small part allows someone who
is doubting but wants to believe to say "oh they are wrong in that, so
I wont read anymore"

Help your fellowman and woman to be set free by thinking carefully
and using strong points.

Dave

29

A Message of Hope

by 7robert7 in

jw
friends

it's been a long time since i've visited this site.

the last time that i was here i was not allowed to participate in this forums discussions for as it was explained to me, "you dont share in our beliefs, therefore your comments, ideas, and expressions would cause conflict, and disunity among those of us who do share in the truth.

" the day i recieved the denial, i broke down in tears and prayed that jesus christ would bring down the walls of hatred and mistrust among those here and that he would allow me the blessed opportunity to some day share the joy that i have found in him.

BugEye

Hi there

Thanks for your message of joy.

I dissagree on one point. That is although the WTBTS is a billion
dollar affair and it is sustained by the literature placement in
particular, you cannot make the statement that money is its motivation
unless you can show some individuals that get wealthy from it.

Watters makes a big hype about this, but there is still no evidence
that any one person or group has become wealthy due to the WTBTS.

I suggest, that initially it started as it said as a bible truth
seeking group, and trapped itself along a path and has had to keep
modifying and manipulating hoping that it will work out somehow.

The concept of "where are we to go" applies in a big way to the
organisers of the WTBTS. If they admit to themselves that they had
it all wrong, then their world will collapse.

Only relatively few are as brave and courageous as Ray Franz. And
the courage is in how to admit to yourself that you were wrong in
teaching something that controlled negatively the lives of millions.

a penny's worth

Dave