LongHairGal

Joined

• started 54 topics
• posted 8,562 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by LongHairGal

• 
  32

  Do you "now" look for more reasons to dislike or hate the JW's?

  by free2beme in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have noticed from reading over this site and from having contact with former witnesses in my personal life, that a lot of time is consumed in the beginning of your exit from the witnesses, with finding further reasons to hate or dislike the jehovah's witnesses.

  with this i was wondering, is this done to give yourself more reason not to return or is it an expression of your freedom to find out what you want without borders.

  from a pure psychological stand-point, i am prone to wonder if it is a means of feeding an inner anger to bring one a faults sense of security, when they are challenged from within to decide if what they are really dealing with is correct thinking or a path that is truly wrong.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  Free2beme:
  
  You raise good points. I'm not really out but there have been times that I think they are right about some things. The problem I have with this is that the wrong things are so wrong that the bad outweighs the good. Even if everything they taught was/is right, because of all I have experienced and seen there (and here) I am a different person. The only way I could be there and be "active" would be to stay on the very fringes and have almost no association and go out in service by myself, etc. Because I absolutely cannot tolerate abuse or disrespect of any sort, I couldn't even "fake" being civil to anybody there if they crossed me. I don't want any confrontations any more.
• 
  33

  Many Stay As JWs Because Of Social & Family Contacts

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  would you agree that most people stay on as witnesses--not because they are "true believers" but because they have no place else to go or they will risk losing their family and friends?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  GaryBuss:

  I can't believe you put up with so much abuse! Your story almost reminds me of a single sister years ago who was always wanted as a "chaperone" (don't you love it) for young couples courting. But when these people finally got married and had get togethers she was forgotten like yesterday's garbage! She's out many years now. But I must admit, your story tops hers.

  I observed all these and other things there and was determined that I would not do favors for anybody there. I did a few but they were minor. Years ago, some nervy sister told me "you don't give of yourself" (she's right). I told her: well, I don't feel like being taken advantage of. She was a divorcee who wanted the young girls in the congregation to do babysitting and other favors for her. And what did she give in return? Oh, she made some plantains in the oven - big deal. What did that set her back? Maybe a few bucks. But she got back more from the friends.

  I got sick to my stomach from this and other sorts of exploitation.
• 
  24

  Them thinking that pioneering is equal to my full time job!

  by LongHairGal in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this was a topic that annoyed me and i got into a bit of an argument years ago over this.. some sister (who never worked a day in her life i might add) with the cushy life, affluent husband thought that because she pioneered it was equal to me having a full time secular job.

  there were others there who naively thought the same thing.

  somehow i gave them an inferiority complex because i worked so they had to dream this up to make themselves feel better.. while i agree that someone who pioneers may be physically tired at the end of the day, there is no comparison to what i have to deal with in going to and from and being on a full time job.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  This was a topic that annoyed me and I got into a bit of an argument years ago over this.

  Some sister (who never worked a day in her life I might add) with the cushy life, affluent husband thought that because she pioneered it was equal to me having a full time secular job. There were others there who naively thought the same thing. Somehow I gave them an inferiority complex because I worked so they had to dream this up to make themselves feel better.

  While I agree that someone who pioneers may be physically tired at the end of the day, there is no comparison to what I have to deal with in going to and from and being on a full time job. I won't even get into the crazy, rude people you meet on public transit or driving with dangerous people on the road plus the back-stabbing behavior you are faced with on a secular job.
• 
  20

  JW women focused on appearance!

  by Sirona in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  it really gets on my nerves.. jw women used to be always focused, as their number one thing, on appearance.

  they could be crap at the rest of the jw stuff, but if they turned up at the meeting dressed nice, thin, long hair, looking nice, all was forgiven.

  of course it was because of the misogyny (sp?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  Further to what you said: you are also right about them liking "girls" (not women) who don't ask questions. They are simply not able or willing to deal with a brain in a female. So some of them want an ever-childlike mate who poses no challenges.
  
  But you have to understand that most dub men don't have an education so therefore their knowledge is limited so they are very intimidated by a woman who is knowledgeable or has opinions. Besides, a young girl hasn't lived long enough to form many opinions anyway.
  
  This is the sad state of affairs there and I see no hope that it will change.
• 
  19

  Are you a contradiction of yourself?

  by IP_SEC in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was having lunch with my best buddy once.

  he was a workmate that i shared an office with and we became very close.

  in fact i credit him a lot for helping me to see the world from a different perspective which led to my taking a closer look at the dubs.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  IPSEC:
  
  I am also a contradiction of myself but I don't think this is necessarily wrong. Because life and people and situations are so very complex there must be exceptions to rules. What may look stupid to other people makes perfect sense to me because there are details that only I know about.
  
  There is a method to my madness.
• 
  20

  JW women focused on appearance!

  by Sirona in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  it really gets on my nerves.. jw women used to be always focused, as their number one thing, on appearance.

  they could be crap at the rest of the jw stuff, but if they turned up at the meeting dressed nice, thin, long hair, looking nice, all was forgiven.

  of course it was because of the misogyny (sp?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  Sirona:
  
  You are so right about what their ideal women is. The part about "figureless" is right on target. They have major issues if you have a "body". Always getting counsel about things low-cut, slits, etc. You are perceived to be "sexy" even if you aren't trying.
  
  They definitely discriminate against those types of women. Sadly, most of the discrimination comes from other women. Most of the special needs talks given are at the instigation of somebody's wife who has a problem with how certain sisters look. Jealousy in action.
• 
  23

  Did you ever get a speeding ticket or make an accident, serving Jehovah?

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  i know an elder who made a couple of accidents and scrapped his car more than once going to the kingdom hall or assembly hall out of town.

  i guess that the angels weren't looking after him that day.... i even remember a brother making an accident with another brother in the field service...lol.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  No, but as a passenger I was in danger. Many years ago, a Sunday car group almost got into a head on left hand turn collision because the stupid brother was busy talking with the rest of the people in the car and not paying attention to the road. I had to yell out WATCH OUT!!! before we got creamed. There were other lesser close calls over the years.
  
  I soon compiled a list of people who I would NEVER get into a car with!!
• 
  15

  Speaking slowly "for the sisters"

  by Grace in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i was looking at the long list of jw "don'ts" and "can'ts" someone posted here and i was reminded of a talk at the service meeting an elder gave once.

  it was from one of the most elementary of publications (aren't they all???

  ) and the elder on the platform said, "i'll speak slowly for the sisters.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  It isn't just the fact that this was a stupid thing to say. The fact is: how could HE even believe it is so? I know that dubs deceive themselves into believing many things are true that are not. But this??
  
  He would have to be less than 100% to even think this is true.
• 
  16

  Disempowerment of women – WTBS use of “that woman Jezebel” analogy

  by cyborg in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just wondering if anyone has had similar experience.

  i could swallow the fact that only men were given main parts at the meeting (i wouldnt want them anyway) but that im humiliated every time i tried to give opinion or make a suggestion, is just beyond me.

  in fact if i was even mildly persistent to make them see my point of view id be presented with that woman jezebel analogy.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  It always got to me that they had a problem with women. I noticed they had a problem even if you weren't trying to be noticed (some women are more attention seeking than others). I remember being at a gathering once where a sis. who was at bethel was relating something and she kept stressing how important it was that women have a humble attitude. She stressed it a bit too much. In all honesty I think she was a nut job. But anyway, I was totally turned off and never had any desire whatsoever to be at bethel or any other place where they were. I don't know about anyone else, but I am a free person over the age of 21 and I will be goddamned if I will let anybody deprive me of my god given dignity and intelligence.
  
  If anybody reads the scripture about the capable wife they will be struck with how resposible and intelligent she would have to have been. Her husband prized her for her intelligence! Now, contrast this attitude with todays dub mentality towards women. As I said once, there must be something in the water today because of the ridiculous fear and the unmanly attitude that is displayed.
• 
  43

  I just turned 28, two minutes ago. What advice can you give me?

  by el jarocho mayor in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, what advice can you give me?

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  LongHairGal

  It was a great age and I wished I could have frozen myself so I would always look the same!
  
  Enjoy!