big tex, you don't sound stupid at all my friend. these are big, BIG issues you are coming to grips with. wrapping your head around these ideas means that while you are trying to do so, you are constantly confronted by your own mortality. and that ain't easy.
at any rate, this death thing is not obvlivion. it's only a cessation of consciousness (seems like obvlivion to you now). which means that 99% of what makes you *you*, (physically), will still be around an hour after your consciousness has disapeared from this universe.
so this brings up a further existential issue: how acquainted is your "conscious mind" with this other 99% of *you*? do you identify *yourself* with ALL of you (every cell, even toe nail cells), or only with your mind?
imho, this is a question that you will need to answer for yourself before you can be at peace with yourself in the Now, which means being at peace with death, life after death, and this so-called God. but in answering the question, you will find that there is a further implication of responsibility on your part. in answering the question it should be obvious that if you only identify yourself with your conscious mind, and not with everything else (in addition), then you will always have issues with life after death and God (note the uppercase "G").
happy trails my fellow traveler,
tetra