evita

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Posts by evita

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  59

  Vaginal Birth or Cesarean Section

  by Dimples in

  1. watchtower
  2. medical

  to all the mommy's out there...did you deliver vaginally or by c-section?.

  i was fortunate enough to deliver both my children vaginally although i came close to a c-section with my son.

  he was in the posterier position.

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  evita

  I had two c-sections for different reasons.
  
  First pregnancy, very easy and no morning sickness. Went into labor on due date. Labored for about 12 hours and pushed for 5 hours. Screamed for pain med and was finally given an epidural and a C because baby was not budging. Beautiful boy weighing 8 lb. 7 oz.
  
  Second time, pregnant with twins. Again no morning sickness but I was put on bed rest at 29 weeks due to premature contractions. I had to be monitored constantly but we made it to 36 1/2 weeks. Water broke but my nearby HMO hospital nursery had closed due to too many babies. So they sent us to a hospital 60 miles away!
  When we got there we were told that baby A was head down ready to go, but baby B was transverse breach. My local hospital had doctors who were experienced in that type of delivery. But this new doctor refused to do the delivery and insisted on a C-section. Out came two more beautiful boys, 6 lbs. 12 oz. and 4 lbs. 7 oz.
  
  I feel both labors were poorly managed. It was very hard recovering from the C-sections as my body shuts down afterwards. I couldn't pee and my milk took a long time coming in. I really had to let go of my bad feeling towards my docs and HMO. What helped was having three healthy, adorable boys. It was all worth it!
  
  Eva
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  142

  Family tragedy.........HappyDad

  by HappyDad in

  1. social
  2. family

  got a phone call from my daughter who lives in florida a couple of hours ago.

  her significant other who i chose to call my son-in-law (because he is the best thing to ever happen to her) got a phone call that his 6 year old daughter was killed in an auto accident near lake placid, florida and his 5 year old son is in very critical condition.

  the ex wife is also critical.

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  evita

  So sorry to hear the sad news. Love and condolences from my family to yours.
  Eva
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  67

  What's the hardest thing you ever had to do?

  by Country Girl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i think the hardest thing i ever went through was my divorce.

  it was something i knew i needed to go through, and get over, but it was the hardest thing of my life.

  i wanted the divorce, but it was so very painful.... what's the hardest thing you've ever gone through?

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  evita

  My parents divorce when I was 9. My mom was devastated and cried constantly.
  Living with an emotionally unstable mother as a young child with no other support system. She took me out of school and we were quite isolated for a number of years.
  Leaving the JW's and having my mother shun me for close to 10 years.
  Putting myself through college with no support from family.
  The first month after my twins were born they had some health issues. I spent some time going back and forth to the hospital with my little Sam while 4 lb. Jack was home with daddy. Our older son was 3 and I felt so torn and frightened that I wouldn't be able to cope. Add recovery from a c-section and post partum blues to the mix and I'm sure you all get the picture. Everything turned out great and we are so blessed with three beautiful, healthy boys (now 13, 10, and 10).
  Finding out my beloved mom had terminal colon cancer. She died just 8 weeks after diagnosis. It was like my worst childhood fear come true. I tried to be there for her as many days as I could but sometimes I could barely stop crying. I was next to her on her bed when she died. I think it was the worst moment of my life.
  
  I am so grateful to have a loving family and friends who have helped me through all these times. And all of you here who responded to my posts after my mother passed away. Thank you.
  In spite of hard times, life is good.
  Eva
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  39

  WHAT DID YOU THINK OF APOSTATES ?????????+

  by vitty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when you were still in the org, did you ever wonder what the apostates were saying?

  the society would just say lies and half truths.i always assumed it was about the trinity, and other religious stuff.

  i thought they were exjws who had become born agains !.

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  evita

  Oooh, scary, evil apostates.
  As I was fading many years ago, a dub came up to me at my place of work to inquire why I no longer attended meetings. I told her I no longer believed it to be the truth. She looked horrified and in front of my co-workers told me I sounded like an APOSTATE. Boy, was i suprised as I never thought this would apply to me! LOL
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  14

  She Cut My Radishes Into Roses!

  by Swan in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  sorry for not posting much lately, but i have been doing really well with the old jw issues until now.. i am in tears tonight because of a memory i had of my childhood.

  i used to open up my lunch-box at school and find my mother had sliced my radishes to look like rose petals.

  wasn't that a really loving thing to do?

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  evita

  Swan, I cried as I read your story; it is so similar to my own. My heart goes out to you and your mom. This religion breaks family bonds and wreaks havoc on our emotions. I hope you get to speak to your mom before it's too late.
  I'm so glad for the time I spent with my mom before she died. Even though our relationship was irreparably damaged by the JW stuff we at least expressed our love for each other and I was by her side when she died.
  Hugs to you.
  Eva
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  44

  Which meetings did you hate the most?

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  out of the 5 weekly meetings, here are the ones i hated the most.. in order.

  1. theocratic ministry school ( i hated speaking in public) got me so nervous.. 2. service meeting ( too much crap and statistics and presentations).

  3. the book study ( just a waist of time ).

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  evita

  The book study was agonizing for me.
  Having to get all dressed for just one hour was torture.
  The house was tiny, less than 800 sq. ft. if I remember correctly so we were crammed in like sardines. There was no way you could not comment without being noticed. No chance of going to the bathroom, doodling, or dozing off.
  The elders family was very cliquey; they laughed and snickered at their own private jokes through the whole meeting. The elder was a lech who told horrendous jokes. None of my friends attended this study.
  We had dessert maybe once in the 8 years I attended this study. My guess is they had dessert after my family left.
  My in-laws live on the same block as this book-study house so I pass by there all the time. Ugh!
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  58

  Quick: How do I JW-proof the house?

  by Thegoodgirl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hey guys, i'm looking for tips.

  i have 48 hours, so how do you jw-proof your house?

  mom and sister and brother-in-law are coming this weekend.

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  evita

  "When you have crazy parents you take what you can get...You hang out with them in their sane moments and avoid them in their crazy ones".
  
  good girl, these words of yours are true for so many of us here. Now that my mom is gone, it breaks my heart to think of how long I lived like this. Even with all the "crazy moments" I really miss my mom. I'm sure you will work all this out at your own pace.
  Eva
  
  Don't forget to hide the self-help books. You don't need these if you have Jehovah's guidance.
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  58

  Quick: How do I JW-proof the house?

  by Thegoodgirl in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hey guys, i'm looking for tips.

  i have 48 hours, so how do you jw-proof your house?

  mom and sister and brother-in-law are coming this weekend.

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  evita

  Good luck, good girl
  
  I found this nearly impossible to do as I have 3 kids and everything seemed to remind my mom that we weren't in the troof.
  One of my worst memories happened many years ago when my twin boys were 3. My mom stopped by unexpectedly and we were dyeing Easter eggs. She was so upset she ran out the door as I was begging her to stay and I would put everthing away. She said she didn't want to "interfere with you practicing your religion". My kids were so confused and I felt terrible. Ironically, I don't have a "religion" to practice thanks to my mom and the JW's.
  My whole house is loaded with stuff JW's hate. Video games, books, movies, holiday paraphenalia, presents, stuff up on the fridge, etc... It got so bad that my mom stopped coming to my house and we just went to hers the years she was speaking to me.
  Oh, don't forget to remove any questionable art work. I forgot I had one depicting a fertility goddess. Oops!
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  34

  What is your favorite memory of your Mom

  by joelbear in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  mine would definitely have to be coming home from school and smelling hot pecan cookies that mom was just taking out of the oven.

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  evita

  My mom loved music and sang to us all the time, mostly bluegrass, folk, spirituals and protest songs. She played the guitar, banjo, dulcimer, flute and drums. This was pre-dub of course. I sing with my kids using a book called "Rise up Singing" and I'm always surprised by how many songs I know thanks to my mom.
  I love this connection with my mom and I really miss those times when she was so beautiful and creative.
  Eva
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  20

  Trouble explaining my life story to my boyfriend of almost 2 years

  by findingmyway in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  well, the time has come to explain my former jw life to my boyfriend of almost 2 years.

  he's getting a bit tired of being there for me during my meltdowns and not knowing or fully understanding why i am having a meltdown.

  i can no longer explain it as pms...he knows me too well now.

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  evita

  I do understand the embarrassment of admitting we were once part of the cult.
  The other day I met up with some very hip homeschool moms and the JW's came up in conversation. Someone asked a question and I had to admit to the group that I had been a dub. No one could believe it! I think they felt sorry for me.
  I especially hate it when people say, "Oh, you were one of those jehovahs". How humiliating.
  That said, it is a part of my past just like a lot of other things but I don't let it define me. It sounds as if you have moved far past them also but your family keeps you attached. That is not your fault.
  I don't think you will regret being honest with your boyfriend. This is the stuff real relationships are made of.
  Eva