So sorry to hear this. We live in N. Calif. and have quite a bit of gang activity around here. My younger boys stay pretty close to home but my 14 yr. old son roams quite a bit. I will remind him to be careful and watch the colors.
Hugs and best wishes for a speedy recovery - from my family to you and yours.
Eva
Posts by evita
-
26A heartfelt warning to parents
by Stealth453 inyesterday, at 5 in the afternoon, my 17 year old son was swarmed and beaten by a gang of 6 young males.
in broad daylight, on the busiest corner of the city, in front of his horrified girlfriend and about 300 passers-by.
he is in the hospital with head injuries.
-
-
evita
-
24
Supporting Vegetarian/Vegan Teens
by Scully inmy youngest is toying with the idea of adopting the vegan lifestyle.
she came to me at 11pm last evening with a strict list of what she wanted me to purchase for her as soon as the store opened this morning.
her enthusiasm could easily have been mistaken for "preaching".... and i'm afraid it didn't foster a very receptive spirit in me.. my main concern is her having adequate nutrition.
-
-
evita
Hi Scully
I am going through this right now with my almost 15yr old son. He declared himself a vegetarian about 6 months ago. Many of his friends come from veg. families and he read Super Size Me and Fast Food Nation. That has been the extent of his involvement in his own well-being and food choices. I am expected to shop for and prepare all the food he eats. He does not like to eat "hippie" food or leftovers but he sure likes the gourmet stuff from Whole Foods, like sushi, and pesto pasta. I was a veg for a few years and mainly ate lentil soup, brown rice, and salad. He doesn't want to eat like that nor does he want to cook or even look at a vegetarian cookbook. He is adamant about the no meat thing and his food can not even come into contact with our meat food so everything has to be cooked seperately.
I tried taking the tough approach and refusing to cook for him if he didn't get more involved in the process. But then he wouldn't eat and he got really skinny.
I am still trying to figure out how to make single portions to avoid waste. I have thrown away more tubs of hummus than I care to admit. Right now we are relying on a lot of frozen single entrees which is less than ideal. He also eats a lot of artisan bread with cheese and tomatoes. On the plus side, he loves salads, veggies, and fruits.
I think the key to my problem is organization. I need to find about ten good recipes to freeze ahead, maybe ones that the whole family will eat, such as lasagne. I have a husband and two other boys, age 11 to cook for so my life revolves around food at this point.
If I had the money, I'd hire a cook.
Eva -
10
I really need to share this with someone...
by troubled mind inbear with me as i lay the ground work for the conversation to follow .
today i had to go for an annual work physical, and the doc is someone that has known my family from when we first were married .
he isn't my personal physician, but worked with my husband for years when my mate was an emt.
-
-
evita
Thanks for sharing that story. Your doc sounds great.
I have been out of the religion for over 20 years. Even now, when someone shows empathy for what I went through or gives me a hug, I am moved to tears. -
38
Were your parents a different religion before JDubism?
by Crumpet ini know an awful lot here are 3rd and 4th generation - but were there any who's parents become dubs as adults?
i'd be interested to here what it was that made an adult become a jw when not brought up that way?.
i'll relate my parents experience shortly...but its something i;ve been thinking about a lot.
-
-
evita
My mom was adopted by a Jewish family shortly after birth (her birth parents were most likely Jews also).
When she was about 5, her adopted mom had a nervous breakdown. She was sent to a Catholic boarding school to be cared for temporarily. No one really knows why. This was very scary for her and she had many bad memories from this time.
When my mom was in her teens, her mom began following Billy Graham. Very unusual for a wealthy Jewish family from the east coast.
Later, she and my mother became somewhat interested in the teachings of Mary Baker Eddy and the Christian Science religion.
My mother moved to NYC to become an actress. She met my dad who was Jewish but an avowed atheist. He told her she was foolish to believe in god. so she put it all aside for a while.
My parents moved to California and became hippies and did lots of drugs. Many people were searching for a spiritual path at this time and my mother renewed her search also. She explored eastern religions and various gurus, but my dad remained a confirmed atheist. My parents divorced around 1969 when I was ten.
My mother at this time was an emotional wreck and severely depressed. The 60's were over and she was divorced with three kids and no community. We lived on public assistance as virtual hermits for about 3 or 4 years. She tried many different churches, desperate for something. Then one fateful day, a neighbor woman named Carmen befriended my mom and began witnessing to her. We attended the KH and were love-bombed. My mom was convinced she had finally found the "truth" and was baptized a short time later.
In many ways, the JW's "saved" my mom. She was severely depressed, scared, and sometimes suicidal. I really wish our family could have gotten the help that we needed but this was the early 70's in a small, rural town.
So that's what happened. -
41
What "Discipline" Did You Recieve While A Witness?
by minimus inwere you "disciplined" by the elders (or jehovah god) for anything while in the "truth"??
?
-
-
evita
I was set to get baptized at age 15. Then I had an argument with my mom out in FS. An old elder was offended and I was told that I couldn't get baptized. I did some heavy-duty "repenting" so they let me get baptized at the next assembly.
I was counselled by an elderette for having lunch at school once with an unbaptized girl whose family were long-time dubs. They didn't like her because she was engaged to marry a much older wordly man. I was furious as she was very nice to me and we could have been friends. She is still married to this guy 30 years later.
We had a young pioneer come to our rural congregation from the city. He was kind of arrogant and I didn't much like him. I went out in service with him and he drove like a maniac. I complained to the elders as I had been taught to do and was counselled about being judgmental. He was really in with the PO and I later heard he had an affair with the elderette from above story.
In my teens I was trying to be a good little dub. I would aux pioneer from time to time to gain approval and attention from the congregation. One time I was not allowed to pioneer because I had not placed enough magazines the last time. It's true my literature placement was very low because I hated FS and was quite bad at it.
Those were the times I remember as the most humiliating and unecessary. The others were the usual: immodest clothes, lack of pantyhose, wordly music, missing meetings, higher education, etc... I actually thought my elders were gentle with the discipline. It was the elders wives who were the most vicious.
The really bad things I did they never found out about so I was never DF'd. -
78
Favorite Band as a teenager........
by whyamihere inas a teenager, what was your favorite band?
this band can be a local, main stream etc..... my favorite local band was little blue crunchy things, they were from milwaukee, wi.
(even hung out with them)!
-
-
evita
I was a teen from 73-78 or something like that.
My favorites were the Eagles, Boston, Journey, Heart, and Fleetwood Mac. Definitely top 40 stuff.
But I also listened to R&B like the Delfonics, O'Jays, Whispers, Marvin Gaye. Also funk like Frankie Beverley and Maze. -
53
After 4 years, an introduction (hope it works this time!)
by gwyneth inive been a member of this board for just over four years, and i have never posted an introduction.
i mostly stick to the "fluff" threads, because they are safe.
i wont be attacked for an unpopular point of view, or hurt anyone elses feelings.
-
-
evita
Wow, what a story! Thanks for sharing.
I was also very hesitant about posting for the first time. I tend not to post on the controversial threads. Sometimes I want to reply but my words seem inadequate. Yet I read almost everything on this forum and appreciate all those who take the time to express themselves.
WELCOME! -
35
when and where
by purplebunnyfoofoo in.
when and where were you baptized.
1974 in evansville indiana, roberts muncipal stadium
-
-
evita
1974
At a circuit assembly in Yuba City (?) Ca. -
40
17 Days: One Final Adventure
by Merry Magdalene ini once posted here a copy of my empassioned plea to the watchtower society--i want my mother back.
well, i just wanted to let all of you know that i got her back for a whole 17 days, and we had one final adventure together before she died, and there wasn't a damned thing they could do about it.. my mother is, was, a long-term loyal jw and i was her disfellowshipped daughter.
i believe she was in an almost constant state of conflict over me because her very strong maternal instincts demanded she behave openly and lovingly toward me, while her wts-trained conscience demanded the opposite.
-
-
evita
Merry
Your story made me cry as it was very similar to mine. I am so sorry for your loss but glad that you had that short time to be with your mom.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful and heartfelt experience.
Hugs, Eva -
23
grief & jw's?
by carla inreading the other thread made me wonder, do jw's ever truly grieve at the loss of a loved one?
i can see in front of other jw's they feel the need to maintain the party line, but in private?
-
-
evita
So sorry for your loss Emma.
My situation was similar in that I "lost" my mom when I left the witnesses over 20 years ago. She died about a year and a half ago. That's when I really began to grieve, not only her death which was devastating but the magnitude of the whole JW thing.
When my mom was dying, I got to know some of her close dub friends. For the most part they were very kind and helpful. After she died, I called one in particular because I was grieving so hard and I felt she would understand. She was very gentle but she did say that she felt sorry for me because I did not have Jehovah and the hope of the new system. Even though I was at my lowest point ever, I knew I would rather go through intense and debilitating grief than be back in that horrible, claustrophobic religion.
When I look at the witnesses I was around during that time, I see that many of them cannot grieve openly or honestly. Many of their honest feelings, such as anger, jealousy, competition, lust, have no outlet so must be suppressed. They are supposed to "rely on Jah and his organization". Instead, they are sick and overweight, they take loads of antidepressants and sleep meds, and have many illnesses such as CFS and fibromyalgia. They are tired and conflicted. And still they continue on, going to meetings and trying to "do more and better" to please Jehovah.
I know there must be a different and better way to live.