Nellie

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Posts by Nellie

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  45

  What makes a truly great kiss?

  by nicolaou in

  1. social
  2. physical

  now i'm not going all girly or anything but kissing is still great!

  if my wife is, for example, preparing a meal i might be able to kiss her on the side of the neck while she's peeling the potato's.

  i know what you're thinking, 'that nic's a smooth ol' romatic operator'!.

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  Nellie

  What makes a truly great kiss?

  The look in his eyes on his way down that says, "You are my love."

  We can't always control what happens to us in life, but we can definitely choose who we spend our lives with! I am so grateful that I choose him!
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  9

  Dilemma.. please help

  by DeusMauzzim in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  first of all thanks for the reactions to my first post.

  very kind of you.. i've been struggling with the following question the last few months.

  'they' are absolutely sure they have chosen their own beliefs, have researched it themselves, are thinking for themselves, and that the organization is just the whole lot of people like them.

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  Nellie

  I too really understand your dilemma. I remember when I was "in" hearing that the Society was a part of the UN. I will never forget my reaction - I turned to my husband and son and said, "That's apostate propaganda! The Society would NEVER be a part of the UN!" That is the mindset of most active witnesses. Even when the TRUTH is shared with them, their minds cannot accept it as truth, because it contradicts what they believe.

  It's not that they don't hear it - but they CAN'T hear it - they're minds are programmed to not accept opposition against the Mother Organization. Until they allow themselves to listen, anything you say will be rejected. Don't take it personally - they're just not ready.

  What you can say is this - I understand that you don't agree with the decisions I've made. I also know that it's futile for me to try to explain myself, because all we'll do is argue. Please accept the fact that this decision was not made lightly on my part - it was made after many hours of prayerful consideration and research. If the day ever comes when you honestly want to know what led me to reach this decision, I will be happy to share it with you. Until then, understand that I will always love you.
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  23

  It's my party - Should we invite them?

  by Nellie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've got extended family that live out of state who are active witnesses and my husband's father is an elder.

  my family is so not a part of our lives, that the only time we speak are for funerals.

  i don't even hear about births anymore.

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  Nellie

  When I made up the guest list - they were not on it. My sister (who is hosting this event) decided to invite a cousin from out of state. This cousin has never been a witness and questioned whether her brother and our other cousins (who are witnesses) were coming. That's how this whole thing started. So last night I called the non-witness cousin and explained the situation to her. (She "praised God" that we were no longer "one of them.")

  Bottom line, these people are my family and I love them - but we're not close in the everyday sort of closeness. We're not even close in the long-distance sort of closeness. No picture exchanges, no phone calls, no nothing really. See because we don't talk, none of the family knows that we've left.

  Actually during the conversation with my cuz, we started talking about how all of the witness couples (except her brother) have all been married longer than me - and NO I have never been invited to any of their parties. Period. Even though I was in one of their weddings 27/28 years ago.

  The reality is I live in Florida - they live in Michigan, Maine, New York and Pennsylvania. I think I'll let the word leak out through my cousin and see what happens. They're the easy ones - it's that father-in-law decision that's really hard.
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  23

  It's my party - Should we invite them?

  by Nellie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've got extended family that live out of state who are active witnesses and my husband's father is an elder.

  my family is so not a part of our lives, that the only time we speak are for funerals.

  i don't even hear about births anymore.

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  Nellie

  I've got extended family that live out of state who are active witnesses and my husband's father is an elder. My family is so not a part of our lives, that the only time we speak are for funerals. I don't even hear about births anymore. The last family get-together was my mother's funeral almost 3 years ago. And my father-in-law isn't much better. We talk to him maybe 4 times a year.

  So now we're having our 25th Anniversary party and my sister wants me to invite them. I'm worried about if they come, them finding out and feeling the need to "counsel" us. So, not what I want to deal with at my party.
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  53

  The love of your life "cheats" on you....could you forgive?

  by new boy in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the old age question............ say, your "soul mate" the love of your life, goes on a trip with some friends.........something happens one night...... they have sex with a stranger( or even a friend)............they come home and tell you what they did............they still love you.. what would you do?...............is the marriage over?

  or what?.

  nb .

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  Nellie

  Here's when I have to say that you need to define "cheating." To my knowledge, my husband has never cheated on me. That is, had sexual relations with another woman. That definition would also be true for me to him. I have never had sexual relations with another man. However . . . there was a time when I was involved in an emotional relationship with someone. When I think back on it, I know that it hurt him (no we've never really, really talked about it) and I know that that kind of situation can be even more damaging/painful than an affair.

  Marriage is more than a sexual partnership, it's an emotional partnership. And the warm feelings that we have for our mates, should never be shared with another. It humbles me that we made it through that, and I am ever so grateful that I was smart enough not to take the physical step - because I don't think he would've forgiven me.

  It also makes it difficult for me to take a hard stand and say I'd never forgive him. I hope I never have to find out!
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  37

  Letter from my mom. What do you think of my response?

  by reneeisorym in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i invited my mom two months ago to my wedding.

  she never responded and then today i get this.

  what do you think of my reply?

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  Nellie

  Renee,

  My heart goes out to you at this time. I hope you have an aunt or other mature woman in your life that you can count on as a surrogate. I was also very close to my mother (she died 2 1/2 years ago) and I couldn't imagine planning or going through my wedding without her. Feel the feelings as they come now and work through them - I wish you nothing but joy on your wedding day!
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  23

  Poll:What is the "average" age of people's baptism in the org?

  by megsmomma in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was 14....and that seems pretty common for those that were in it young....... .

  how in the world is a 14 year old ready to commit themselves to anything life altering?.

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  Nellie

  I think the average age is 12. But, I've known some as young as 9 to take the dunk - never agreed with it though.

  I was 13.
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  15

  What do you single guys do?

  by frozen one in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  do any other single guys here experience this?

  i can go for months without meeting one woman of interest.

  then suddenly women start coming out of the wood work.

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  Nellie

  Wait a minute - when did he say he was looking for a friend? Isn't he looking for a relationship? Be upfront yes, upfront about the fact that he's looking and is interested in getting to know whether they are the right one. The way you get to know whether or not they have potential is by TALKING to them - stay in the talking phase and don't rush to the physical one. That way you can't be accused of being a player.
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  6

  they finally called on me after almost 10 yrs

  by orbison11 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  boy was it tuff.

  a nice, sweet mature couple, in their mid 60's, were catholic, from scotland/ireland...been jws for about 12 years so i could still do circles around them... i was very pleasant with them, as i think they approached me with pleasantness,,,not craziness.

  about 2 min.

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  Nellie

  I thought it was the brothers out looking for that one sheep. . . I should've known better!
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  24

  Do CO's discuss inactive publishers?

  by Inquisitor in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  during his visit, what exactly does the circuit overseer discuss with the body of elders with regards to inactive publishers?.

  are inactive publishers even on the agenda?

  or is this of no concern to the co and pretty much left to the discretion of the local boe?.

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  Nellie

  I used to wonder why people who left the organization were full of so much anger. Threads like this make it all so clear . . .