Hello Air,
What a situation you are in. You must be torn in so many directions, Trying to please your parents, elders,sisters and brothers and finally God.
You did state that you were almost 18, do you believe that The Witnesses are right, or is it something that you have been taught since birth. This was the case for me, and I did not make my OWN decison until I was 26 years of age. Seeing some of the same things you mentioned..favorable treatment etc.
The point I'm trying to make, have you truly come to the conclusion that this is the religion for you. Try to take a step back and ask yourself if this is what you want. If it is perhaps your friends and family will come around. If it is not something you desire or are questioning your motives i.e. please parents,friends perhaps you should reconsider WHY you are in tnis religion, research it if you can.
I can tell you I have expierenced several things within the JW way that pushed me to the option of suicide and after some research espically since in John is says you will know your brothers by the love that they show. I did not see any more love and made an adult decison to leave.
But you must examine you own expierences and heart and see if this may be the option for you. You cant please everyone and your going to find that your mental health will suffer because of it.
(((((((((((((((( HUGS and Welcome))))))))))))))))))))))))
C
When the pain of being where we are, becomes greater than our fear of letting go...we will risk and heal and grow.