Don't fret too much. A lot of people participate in holiday things feeling like frauds a bit, but do it to be sociable or out of kindness, to further business interest, etc. Others have no problem dismissing it for lack of inclination. Just go into it to the extent that feels right to you or use it as a yearly reminder to go the extra mile to be kind or giving. However it works for you. Just enjoy what you like and distance yourself when you want just like normal folks do.
JWdaughter
JoinedPosts by JWdaughter
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18
Navigating the "real world"
by Minerva inalthough i haven't called myself a witness in almost 15 years, i'm still married to one (which has it's own set of challenges and is fodder for a completely different post).
i haven't spent a lot of time on forums with other ex-jws either, but thought i would throw this question out to you all because it's something i still struggle with.... particularly for those of you who were raised in or were in the religion for many years - what has it been like for you to navigate the work world?
i would be a 3rd generation jw on one side of my family and a 4th generation on the other side -- the hardest thing for me has been just knowing how to act and behave, especially among co-workers.
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73
Quite Possibly The Most Sinister Speaker Ever?
by pale.emperor inhi guys.. "brother" jose is quite possibly the most sinister speaker i've ever seen or heard.
and i've seen/head a lot of cults in my time.. he's over the top with his voice tone and gestures.
i see a future governing body member in the making here:.
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JWdaughter
The voice, the slitted eyes, head lowered, eyes up. Ugh. And his 911 emergency analogy works only after you determine if the criminal harming you is a JW.
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14
Turkeys ... to brine or not to brine (recipe)
by RubaDub inbeing that time of the year when you can buy turkeys so cheap (most jw's i know but at least a couple) or in some cases food stores give one away with a purchase exceeding some dollar amount, i was just interested in any interesting recipes.. we usually do the brine thing (3/4 cup salt to 1 gallon of water, a few packets of chicken bouillon, some random additional spices, dry or fresh as desired).
cover the turkey completely and then let it soak overnight ( we usually do about an hour a pound).
not a real precise recipe but it does, in our opinion, make for a much more juicy bird without the typical dryness that often happens.. depending on the size of your refrigerator, it may take some gymnastics to get a big pot with a turkey in it.
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JWdaughter
I used a roasting bag for the first time this year. Lots of poultry seasoning, salt and pepper. That's it. Roasted til done. Skin will not crisp in bag, but meat was tender and flavorful. They were midamar halal turkey$. I made two. I have a lot of leftovers as there was waaaaaay too much food.
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10
Wills - A disgruntled father making a final point
by Listener inan unusual and amusing will was contested in an australian court a few years ago.the deceased man separated from his wife in 1959 and shortly after the wife was baptized as a jw.
in the following years their four children also got baptized.
apparently this enraged the deceased for the remainder of his life, who was himself a catholic.his will included two conditions that his four children were required to fulfill before they would qualify to receive their share of the inheritance.
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JWdaughter
I bet few of those other relatives, esp grandkids, are catholic. They are likely even diffident to religion at all if raised by jws
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21
November Broadcast - truly evil
by iwasblind inhi there i don't watch much of the propaganda on jw.org anymore but i did catch the november broadcast.. i think these guys are either evil or controlled by someone who is incredibly skilled at mind control.. firstly, they establish their authority by saying "everything" else is a lie - you can't trust media or anyone.
"there is no inspiration today.." but they somehow have the direct connection with god - yuck.. then, they proceed with that disgusting "shunning" drama - but now it is not called shunning, (around 24 mins) the mother said... "if we were to stand between levi and the discipline he needs we would in affect be blocking an expression of jehovah's love from reaching him...".
i am so angry at this, what a load.
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JWdaughter
Cool how a JW could have more power than God and block his love.
Arrogant much?
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37
How does an elder become an elder ?
by Drwho ini was never a jw , so have millions of questions .
please, how does an elder become an elder and how much trust does or should a jw put in an elder .?
simon.
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JWdaughter
My observation is that it takes no effort at all in some congregations. Well, breathing helps.
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37
How does an elder become an elder ?
by Drwho ini was never a jw , so have millions of questions .
please, how does an elder become an elder and how much trust does or should a jw put in an elder .?
simon.
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JWdaughter
My aunt's husband was just a study in 2009. Not sure when he was baptised, but it was a point of pride that he was immediately appointed MS upon being baptised and is an elder now for over 3 years. He is a nice guy, but clueless. He seem to just be in to support my aunt who has had a totally dysfunctional life since childhood, and lifelong association and several DFings with the JWs. Her kids all rejected her and I am convinced that this particular dance with the org will soon be over. She's a pioneer after all her experiences, obviously needs some validation when the one kid in jail for sex abuse, the other a drug addict who refused to see her after a suicide attempt and the one stable one have cut off all ties for their mental health. She was reinstated sometime after 2009 and is now the prototypical droning self righteous JW. She doesn't sugarcoat her past, but kind of wears it as a badge of honor. I give her credit for wearing her crazy that boldly, but that those are two of the recently active members says something. To their credit, they are keeping it together, and are kind folks.
I guess my point is that they don't seem to be that picky about elders these days. Uncle is really just their for aunt and when she quits again or goes off the rails and is DFd, he will go with her. She is a true believer and will always go back to it if she survives. She drAnk the cool aid completely, but he is a warm body with(presumably) a penis.
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RANT: Isn't Cognitive Dissonance Amazing?
by Sorry inthis is piggybacking off my previous post (about my 'personal study').
while i haven't been a long time member, i'm sure if you have my posts you'll know that i'm disenchanted with the wt and am just grunting and bearing until i have a stable enough support system to break away.
however, lately i'm just getting extremely angry at nearly everything that's going on.
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JWdaughter
I know why ex JWs sometimes go off the rails entirely. JWs are manipulative and false, and can get everyone buying into the abuse THEY received when a non believer speaks plainly. They are like an ex spouse who paints the picture so that former in laws reject you. Only your family is all looking at you sideways because your parent is so distraught by your "cruelty". I sometimes start to think that every happy family picture is a big fat lie. The funhouse mirror is now the only way they see the world so the lies and manipulation is done with a perverse sincerity in their eyes.
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24
Shunning & separation from family
by CJxfarmx ini was raised in jw as a child.
my dad was a jw my mom was not, they are divorced now.
i was never baptized or anything but i stopped going once i had the choice at age 12. now i am 41 and my dad will not associate with me, my wife or my 3 kids.
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JWdaughter
Your dad is a jerk. Had he stayed in any kind of contact with you, it likely would be to harangue you and assault your ears with his theocratic speeches. You haven't lost much in that man. I"m sorry you were orphaned.
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13
Sex & Divorce
by IMHO in1. you can't have sex until your married.. 2. you're not married until you've gone through a legal ceremony.. 3. you get 'unscriptually' (although legally) divorced therefore not 'free' to remarry'.
4. can you still 'scriptually' have sex with your former spouse?.
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JWdaughter
Atomant, are you a virgin or have you never used a condom? Because there is skin to skin contact even with a condom.
As to the WT, their opinion really doesn't matter. What are they going to do? DF you for having sex with the person that they consider you to still be scripturally married to (barring infidelity)?