Another thought, have someone from another religion try to "witness" to him. Something really wierd, like Islam or Hindu. Something that he isn't familiar with. Then, ask him how he felt about someone trying to change his spiritual belief. See if he gets it that people don't like to change their religion.
skeeter1
JoinedPosts by skeeter1
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56
How can I stay motivated for field ministry?
by jgnat inthus asks my beloved and slow-on-the-uptake jw hubby, who is finding it increasingly difficult to drag himself out the door.
so far, i've tried to avoid sarcastic comebacks (i'ts boring and useless!
duh!
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Advise needed please
by EdenOne indear forumites, i need your advise please.. i would like to write a letter to the world headquarters of the jehovah's witnesses regarding a subject that i've published an article recently.
i would like to draw the attention of the gb to said article, which i will send in print form (therefore, no attention would be drawn to the website where it was published).. naturally, because i am a jehovah's witness in good standing in the congregation and what i'll be discussing in my letter will be a dissenting view from the official doctrine/practice, i want to protect my identity and i don't want to be harassed by elders or subjected to any sort of judicial investigation.
nevertheless, i would be very interested in reading their response (if any) to my letter.. how can i do that?
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skeeter1
Someone sent a letter for me, asking my questions. They got a response. It was not a reply becuase it didn't address the issues at all. It basically restated their policy and encouraged the letter sender to study with me becuase I was now asking questions!
Barbara Anderson tried very hard to change the Society on pedophilia, way before ever going on national tv. She got no where. The Society is not impressed with 'bottom up' communication. Even after court cases, they still keep the "2 witness rule" and the "3 year elder rule" that protects pedophiles. Not even multi-million dollar lawsuits sway these guys. Nor NBC.
But, you go ahead and try. But, if they put it together that you sent the letter, plan for the consequences.
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Had a walking match with two Mormons today lol
by outinthemeadows inand i thought witnesses were bad....... i was walking home in rather a rush and two mormons were in front of me.
suddenly one of them turned around and approached me with their book of mormon aka dodgy bible.
he was from germany and spoke surprisingly good english.
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skeeter1
Did you see the article about the Mormon sympathizing with Tom Cruise over Katie Holme's bashing his religion?
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First post
by thedog1 inthis is a very strange thing for me to do.
i have been an active witness for over 25 years.
i currently serve as an elder and i conduct the watchtower study.
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skeeter1
Welcome!
A high control organization needs docile, abiding and non-questioning followers. See North Korea as an additional example.
Many individual Jehovah's Witnesses are docile, abiding and non-questioning; to a degree not seen in the public at large. As are many North Koreans. Is it out of love or fear, is the question. But, the answer is that it doesn't matter. Because without the character trait, the organization would not survive.
I hope you the best on your spiritual journey. I was never an elder, or an MS. I left when I was a snotty nosed teenager in 1985ish. I wanted to go to college. That was against the rules becuase the "Generation of 1914" would not pass away. I went to college and followed my passion. My older siblings were teenagers leading up to 1975. They were also discouraged by the Watchtower Society to not go to college, because the end of the world is near. My father was discouraged to go to college (or even marry) in the 1950s, becuase the End was near. He eventually took a few classes, and one sibling went. They saw that college was not sinful. And, they all rallied around me to go and buck the WTS. I bucked the Society too.
So, the new ruling is that there is an overlapping generation. The fact that the world is going to go on is manifest in the building of new Kingdom Halls and Bethel locations.
Just, keep thinking. It's going to be hard ride for you, as it was for many of us. Watch the movie, "The Truman Show." It has nothing to do with the JWs, but everything to do with what you are going through.
Skeeter
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How can I stay motivated for field ministry?
by jgnat inthus asks my beloved and slow-on-the-uptake jw hubby, who is finding it increasingly difficult to drag himself out the door.
so far, i've tried to avoid sarcastic comebacks (i'ts boring and useless!
duh!
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skeeter1
I wouldn't encourage him to do it. And, i wouldn't discourage him to not go. If you mock him in any way, will he go into defensive mode? Then, he will have to prove to you that"he's strong" and go out in service.
What day(s) does he normally go out on? Have another activity planned for that day, and let him know in advance. In his mind, he will then replan a service day that isn't on his normal schedule as make-up, at most. But becuase make-up is not his normal group, no one will be waiting/expecting him. And, he will be much more likely to skip his make-up day. This is especially true if he's trying to avoid going out with someone. Remember, how many JWs avoid each other!
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Planning the xmas party-suggestions needed
by TweetieBird ini am in charge of planning the resident xmas party (300 apartments that i manage) and about 100 to 150 residents will be there.. i already have a musician lined up but need ideas for food, theme, etc.
$400 budget for food, etc.
any ideas?
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skeeter1
You are on too tight of a budget for over 100 people
I think you are going to have to do trays of finger food and drinks. On drinks, I'd stick with Beer & Wine. Wine is cheap, Kirkland (Costco) always has great bottles of their own brand for about $5-$7 a bottle. Check with your local grocery store deli or Costco/Sams on finger sandwiches, chicken trays, veggie trays.
Games are cheap. But, just do one or two. Adults want to mingle most of all. Kids need more games because they don't mingle.
What about decorations? Big Lots & Dollar Store are usually the cheapest.
You are going to need alot of paper goods, and those can be expensive. At your budget, I suggest Red Solo cups.
Make sure you bill it is a "Holiday" Party. Not a "Christmas" Party, or many non-Christians in your community could feel discriminated against. Apartment communities have to abide by the Fair Housing Act . . ..
Skeeter
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Narcisstic Personality Disorder...
by new hope and happiness inhi,.
i would value any shared opinions or expereinces people have had with narcisstic people.. .
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skeeter1
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Symptoms
By PSYCH CENTRAL STAFF
Narcissistic Personality Disorder is characterized by a long-standing pattern of grandiosity (either in fantasy or actual behavior), an overwhelming need for admiration, and usually a complete lack of empathy toward others. People with this disorder often believe they are of primary importance in everybody’s life or to anyone they meet. While this pattern of behavior may be appropriate for a king in 16th Century England, it is generally considered inappropriate for most ordinary people today.
People with narcissistic personality disorder often display snobbish, disdainful, or patronizing attitudes. For example, an individual with this disorder may complain about a clumsy waiter’s “rudeness” or “stupidity” or conclude a medical evaluation with a condescending evaluation of the physician.
In laypeople terms, someone with this disorder may be described simply as a “narcissist” or as someone with “narcissism.” Both of these terms generally refer to someone with narcissistic personality disorder.
Symptoms of Narcissistic Personality Disorder
In order for a person to be diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) they must meet five or more of the following symptoms:
- Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
- Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
- Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
- Requires excessive admiration
- Has a very strong sense of entitlement, e.g., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
- Is exploitative of others, e.g., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
- Lacks empathy, e.g., is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
- Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
- Regularly shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes
As with all personality disorders, the person must be at least 18 years old before they can be diagnosed with it.
Narcissistic personality disorder is more prevalent in males than females, and is thought to occur in less than 1 percent in the general population.
Like most personality disorders, narcissistic personality disorder typically will decrease in intensity with age, with many people experiencing few of the most extreme symptoms by the time they are in the 40s or 50s.
Learn more about the symptoms and characteristics of someone with narcissitic personality disorder.
How is Narcissistic Personality Disorder Diagnosed?
Personality disorders such as narcissistic personality disorder are typically diagnosed by a trained mental health professional, such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. Family physicians and general practitioners are generally not trained or well-equipped to make this type of psychological diagnosis. So while you can initially consult a family physician about this problem, they should refer you to a mental health professional for diagnosis and treatment. There are no laboratory, blood or genetic tests that are used to diagnose personality disorder.
Many people with narcissistic personality disorder don’t seek out treatment. People with personality disorders, in general, do not often seek out treatment until the disorder starts to significantly interfere or otherwise impact a person’s life. This most often happens when a person’s coping resources are stretched too thin to deal with stress or other life events.
A diagnosis for narcissistic personality disorder is made by a mental health professional comparing your symptoms and life history with those listed here. They will make a determination whether your symptoms meet the criteria necessary for a personality disorder diagnosis.
Causes of Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Researchers today don’t know what causes narcissistic personality disorder. There are many theories, however, about the possible causes of narcissistic personality disorder. Most professionals subscribe to a biopsychosocial model of causation — that is, the causes of are likely due to biological and genetic factors, social factors (such as how a person interacts in their early development with their family and friends and other children), and psychological factors (the individual’s personality and temperament, shaped by their environment and learned coping skills to deal with stress). This suggests that no single factor is responsible — rather, it is the complex and likely intertwined nature of all three factors that are important. If a person has this personality disorder, research suggests that there is a slightly increased risk for this disorder to be “passed down” to their children.
Treatment of Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Treatment of narcissistic personality disorder typically involves long-term psychotherapy with a therapist that has experience in treating this kind of personality disorder. Medications may also be prescribed to help with specific troubling and debilitating symptoms. For more information about treatment, please seenarcissistic personality disorder treatment.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Resources
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Narcisstic Personality Disorder...
by new hope and happiness inhi,.
i would value any shared opinions or expereinces people have had with narcisstic people.. .
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skeeter1
With drinking, she loses her inhibitions and self-control of her tongue. This woman is layered like an onion. At the core, I think her real self is very honest and super hard working woman who made it through some very rough times. You see this side when she's sober or working. But, she chain smokes times three. I have met smokers, but this one will smoke 6 or 7 cigarettes in an hour...along with 4 beers! Her body, skin, teeth, gums, everything is telling the tale of that horrible addiction. NPDs have addiction issues. Unfortunately, she trained her children well. Her oldest daughter is addicted to status symbols and made her husband buy her a several thousand dollar purse. The young couple is comfortable, but not super wealthy. I didn't even know they made such expensive purses. A Coach for $300 is expensive to me, but several thousand? Her other daughter wants an old, farty car, a Bently. How many kids want a Bently? When she gets too drunk, I have to escort her back home. Keep it short, and there are no hard feelings. But, stay in a room with her while she's getting on her NPD high, and she's toxic. She'll have everyone else in tears. Classic "Housewives of Beverly Hills" type.
Oh, I remember a time when one of her children made Honor Roll. We were at the ceremony becuase one of our kids made it too, as well as a kid we sometimes take care of. Well, the school's Honor Roll applauded any child who made A's & B's. She came up to us, just smoldering underneath her skin. She was angry that the school didn't separate the gifted, advanced, and NOT have any honor roll for the regular kids or those with special needs/autism. "Those" kids shouldn't get Honor Roll!", she was trying to convince us of. I spoke my mind, and said, "Every child had to apply themselves equally given their level. And that is what is being rewarded." Then, I had to turn away. Her child getting Honor Roll was an extension of her; and she didn't want it associated with autistic kids.
Here's another doozy. She has friends with money who bought a really kick-arse car. She took her child to visit them. They went on a day road trip. The man (not too smart either) proceeded to drive his new, kick-arse car at over 100 mph on normal, back streets. She bragged & bragged about how much fun it was to drive so "super" fast (super told over & over & over again in her story) in such a "super" car. Then, she made the man take her and her child to really nice restaurants, so her child could be acquainted with the "high life." Becuase the "high life" was super important to her. This same man belongs to country clubs where one is admitted only on their family's lines. He took her to one of them. She was going on & on & on about how "super" those clubs were. So, I said a line (from a movie), "You mean the people in those clubs only get in based on their family history, even if they have money." She said, "Yes, just becuase you are rich doesn't mean you have a family history." So, I said, "Wow, those must be some golden vaginas those babies slid out of." Her mouth dropped. It was priceless. Heeee, heee.
None of us are perfect. We may find ourselves around people with NSD and then have fun with them. We are not perfect either. It's kind of like that book/movie The Ender's Game. Sometimes messing with her is just too much fun. I can't help it. If I have to listen to her bullshit, I get the honor of slipping her a put-down. So, now you all know I have a dark side too.
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Narcisstic Personality Disorder...
by new hope and happiness inhi,.
i would value any shared opinions or expereinces people have had with narcisstic people.. .
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skeeter1
My spouse's friend (a neighbor) probably has NPD. She ossilates into having NPD and being normal. The more alcohol, the more NPD comes out. They are self-absorbed people who want "the best" to clothe their body. Designer everything, and only designer. Chain smoker and can be a heavy drinker, too. Seems nervous, until she is talking about her latest shopping trips or times she went out partying. She glorifies clubbing. Anything my spouse does or buys, is "nice, but not to her taste." So, my spouse has called her outfits, "costumes." I prefer my spouse's clothes. The best way to deal with these people is to call them out on it. Directly asked her if she needed her designer clothes to make her happy. Directly asked her if her clubbing friends' children were so 'messed up' becuase the parents were not focused 'at all' on their children.
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A child that DIDN'T want to die ... a blood experience you won't read in Awake! or on JW.ORG
by wannabefree inwhile doing work for a client in her office recently, we got into a light discussion about religion.
she knew i was one of jehovahs witnesses as our business relationship started while i was still a loyal and believing jw.
anyway, i said something that she knew didnt quite fit and she said ... i thought you were one of jehovahs witnesses ... i shared my story ... she felt comfortable to confide in me a story as to why, even though she has had dealings with jehovahs witnesses who she thinks are good people, she would never even consider listening to them about their religion.. i asked her if she would write it down for me so that i could share ... she agreed.. this is her experience.. .
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skeeter1
Most states do not allow a minor the right to deny life saving medical treatment. When it's an "advanced minor", I remember that there are only about 5 states that allow advanced minors the right to "independently" (I say that loosely) die by not accepting medical treatment. The reason for judges to rule this way is obvious. A minor has been coccooooooned by his parent's religion. He has had no opportunity to seek out alternatives to his belief system. Therefore, his belief system is not developed, no matter how hard the WTS would argue it is.
Skeeter