FusionTheism something probably 99.9% of us on here have in common is at one time we took the bible as the infallible word of god... truth. At one point. Some have abandoned it all together. Some still hold on. You are still holding on.
Since we all gave the bible the courtesy of believing it you should give not believing it some courtesy. Completely look at it from either a neutral standpoint ot fake all together. When you view it as the work of men, believe me the truth in the bible speaks much greater volumes to you, and that truth is its a bunch of rubbish. But you can't ever see thay when you are blinded by bias, when you are afraid the desert god is going to smite you for not believing, that you aren't going to get your own lion petting zoo in paradise. I think you are a sincere person FT and this is not ridicule but grow some balls and look at it for what it is. Just for a whIle. A permanent agnostic is just an atheist without balls. Most all of here that are godless took that trip through agnostism first. Don't get stuck. See it all the way through withou bias, then if you want to go back. OK. But you need to let it all go to see it for what it is. I mean this in all true kindess. Again not trying to belittle you at all.
Your friend FMF.