Whatever you call it, all I know is if you were an elder's kid, your father was so proud if you did it and there was hell to pay if you didn't! Before the meeting, you were pressured to commit to raising your hand for specific paragraphs. You had to rehearse your answer in the car on the way to the meeting, like it took profound thought. Yuck. There was the urgent jab in the ribs from mother's elbow warning of your upcoming "comment." It was a huge embarrassment for the elder if his kid didn't comment and I tried to never do it. It was such a farce. You'd raise your hand and microphone boy scurried over so you could read a couple sentences from the Witchtower. Conductor: "How, then, should young ones feel when pressured to comment on crapola from the Faithful Slave?" (Smirking) "Yes, let's hear from Little Missy Virgochik who has volunteered to comment!" No I didn't! It was the bony elbow, the dirty looks and the threat of disapproval and scowling for days if I didn't. Better to get it over with! Ah, the memories.
Virgochik
JoinedPosts by Virgochik
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43
"Commenting" at Meetings
by cameo-d ini don't quite understand why you call it commenting.. when i attended meeting the question at end were read.. when people "commented" it was never a real comment.. it was just reading back word for word a sentence or two from the paragraph that answered the question.. i would think "commentary" would be something you put in your own words and give a personal statement about it.. .
why do you call it "comments" when it is more like reciting?.
or is it different in other kh?.
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Virgochik
This is totally disgusting and caused my teenage rebellion as an elder's daughter. My dad warned me I'd never get a husband with my attitude, My retort was, good! I don't want one anyways! Now I'm married, and sometimes my husband and I fight like cats and dogs, but nobody is the boss of the other. We wouldn't have it any other way. We're no 1950's couple, like Lucy and Ricky. Honestly, my mother really did scamper to the door in her gingham apron to greet dad when he came home from work. It made me want to hurl then, and I sure can't see how any 2009 woman can go along with this crap. Yuck!
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Has anyone done the WT comments this week (They Keep Following the Lamb)?
by Mickey mouse inhas anyone done the wt comments this week?
today's wt was a classic!
does anyone have a pdf of it?
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Virgochik
Blondie, thank you for working on this for us in spite of your emergency! It's much appreciated.
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Mindful Eating
by rebel8 inhave you read this book?
mindful eating: a guide to rediscovering a healthy and joyful relationship with food (paperback), by jan chozen bays (author).
mr. rebel8 and i are reading it right now to eat healthier.
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Virgochik
I had trouble keeping weight ON as a Elder's Daughter Perfect Example Kid, lol. As a teen, I was so nervous being perfect and hating the meetings that I felt like throwing up all the time.
I like Stevia the best. It's super sweet, so a little bit in tea or coffee (1/3 of a packet) goes a long way. I haven't noticed a wierd after taste with Stevia, but I really do with Splenda. You can get used to it fairly quickly if you want to. Moderation is the ticket with anything, but these sweeteners help while weaning away from sugar.
I went on Adkins over four years ago and lost and have still kept off 35 pounds. Stevia and Splenda gave me a boost in the beginning. Now I've modified my diet to just eat healthy and in modest portions. I wear size 4 or 6 and I feel great! I can't really stomach sugary desserts now because I'm not used to them.
My splurge is a glass of Shiraz or Chianti with cheese and crackers before bed. Gotta enjoy life!
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Mindful Eating
by rebel8 inhave you read this book?
mindful eating: a guide to rediscovering a healthy and joyful relationship with food (paperback), by jan chozen bays (author).
mr. rebel8 and i are reading it right now to eat healthier.
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Virgochik
I was successful weaning myself away from sweets by substituting Splenda or Stevia. It was almost like a withdrawal from drugs or something for a few days. Once the sugar craving is out of your system, you really don't miss it. There are so many things available now with Splenda, even ice creams and chocolates.
You'll feel so much better without the ups and downs sugar causes. Hope it goes well!
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Were your parents control freaks?
by Dustin ingrowing up in the jw religion and having a dad who was an elder, i remember how controlling they were.
i find it amazing now just how much of my childhood i missed out on.
i couldn't watch alot of t.v.
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Virgochik
My Dad was a congregation servant and then an elder the whole time I was growing up. I had to be inspected before every meeting to make sure my hose didn't have runs, my skirt wasn't too short, shoes were OK, hair was OK, I had my Bible/songbook/bookbag or whatever all ready so I could be a good example. He did this outside, by the car so the neighbors could see. I had to turn a complete circle to be looked over.
I don't know if he was ignorant, or what, but one time I had a zit on my chin since I was a teenager. He asked me what the thing was on my face and I had to explain it. A teenage chick's already embarassed about having a zit on her face so obviously, here I am 50 years old and still remembering how this made me feel.
When I got to be about 17 they started inviting "suitable brothers" over to the house for lunch after the Watchtower study. I guess they decided it was time for me to get married. Needless to say, I got a crummy job and an apartment and got the hell away from them as soon as possible. I never dated any of their picks.
Sometimes I still lay in bed before work in the morning and just remember things, like how my Mother made my clothes until I just flat out refused to wear them in junior high school. I realize now how naive and uneducated and inexperienced they were, and what a wierd childhood I had being raised by these two odd people. They meant well, I do believe, but they have no idea what memories I still carry and how narrowminded they were and how many opportunities they denied me. I did have a few talents but when my teachers approached them about college or joining band or language clubs and they always decided for me. "Virgochik wants to put Jehoveh's interests first in her life, thank you anyway. She won't be participating in any after school clubs."
I have days still when I'm really angry, and days when I just feel sorry for them. They haven't changed much, still narrowminded and stuck in the mud. They've got no interest in learning to text message, or sending emails, for example. I just have to shake my head and move on. Well, I try to move on, but we still have those random memories crop up, don't we?
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***Things You'd Like To Say But Stifle Yourself From Saying***
by minimus indue to the fact that my mother and some other relatives and a handful of friends are devout jehovah's witnesses, i sometimes stifle my remarks regarding "the truth".. my mother asked me if i felt bad at all for not attending the memorial this year.
(she still holds hope i might come back).
i simply said that i did not feel bad at all.
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Virgochik
I wonder how many of us kids who weren't ever supposed to see careers are helping our elderly parents out financially nowadays? How many of us are darned lucky (yes, I said the "L" word!) to have stumbled upon good jobs in spite of not being allowed to go to college, and now we help Mom and Dad with groceries or mail Wal-Mart gift cards to them? Don't they feel the littlest twinge of guilt? Because we did it in spite of them, and without their help. We made it on our own.
I want to ask, "Aren't you secretly just a bit proud of me?
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***Things You'd Like To Say But Stifle Yourself From Saying***
by minimus indue to the fact that my mother and some other relatives and a handful of friends are devout jehovah's witnesses, i sometimes stifle my remarks regarding "the truth".. my mother asked me if i felt bad at all for not attending the memorial this year.
(she still holds hope i might come back).
i simply said that i did not feel bad at all.
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Virgochik
I'd like to casually ask my parents, "Hey, remember in 1975, when you said I wouldn't finish high school, and I'd never have to have a career? Then you guys took early retirement to pioneer? Wow, isn't it a lucky, er, fortunate, that I got a good government job so I can help you now with food and utilities? I mean, who woulda thought I'd be planning MY retirement in a few years?"
Wonder what they'd have to say?
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Congregation politics are so bitter precisely because the stakes are so low
by Olin Moyles Ghost inthough i've never been an elder (thank god), i was raised by one and know several.
it has been my observation that there is a tremendous amount of politics on bodies of elders.
this is probably not a news flash to most of you.. there is a saying that "academic politics are so bitter because the stakes are so low.
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Virgochik
We had a similar split at my last hall before I moved out from my parents. The "MC" congregation got all the popular people and the best meeting times. The "TC" congregation had to meet on Sunday afternoons or early evenings. It sucked. The joke was, "Oh, no, you got assigned to TC!" The publishers were the weak ones, and attendance was lower in the Sunday evening meetings. It was no accident, it was a popularity contest. So many things I saw proved beyond any doubt that this religion wasn't anything guided by Jesus.
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Congregation politics are so bitter precisely because the stakes are so low
by Olin Moyles Ghost inthough i've never been an elder (thank god), i was raised by one and know several.
it has been my observation that there is a tremendous amount of politics on bodies of elders.
this is probably not a news flash to most of you.. there is a saying that "academic politics are so bitter because the stakes are so low.
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Virgochik
I grew up on stories about the servants, as they called them when I was a kid in the 60's and 70's. We usually had a long drive home from meetings on school nites, so I'd curl up in the back seat burrowed into my coat to sleep. This was because my dad would storm off with our publisher cards to a Hall in a nearby town because he'd got into it with the clique and moved us to another congregation. (It usually wasn't much better.)
Then, it began. My dad would rant all the way home to my mom about the latest backstabbing and snarky comments the brothers made in the library. Competition was fierce to be PO or just to be powerful in the congregation, and there was more campaigning than in election year!
Even as a child it bothered me. How could those brothers be so mean to my daddy? If my daddy was always angry and upset and planning revenge against his latest rival, was something wrong at the Hall? I sensed something very wrong with the picture and knew hypocrisy when I saw it. There was always a rush to butter up the new CO and DO even if it meant badmouthing some other brother. Dad said he could tell he'd been slandered prior to meeting them, by the way they acted funny towards him. He'd find out the CO had been invited to dinner at Brother Backstabber's home the night before and he'd been talked about.
Then there were the wives who ran their own gossip rings and never included my mom, because of their husbands feuding. Some of the sisters would swoop past me with a smirk, because mom wasn't in the clique, and I was only a child!
All the way home, they talked about different ones and even had nicknames for people. It was really ugly and nasty and to this day, I remember those rides home after the meetings. And they wonder why I left "the truth" when I became an adult. Lately, they're wondering why I don't want to come back! My dad was treated very malicious and shabby, but he dished out plenty too.
It's all bogus- no way Jesus would ever have treated anybody this way and I want no part of it!