i have been reading a book my hubby recommended to me- man's search for meaning - by viktor frankl.
very good book.
he is a survivor of nazi concentration camps and it's not just another grisly tale of horrors of cc life.
I, too, know this feeling. Even when I reach out and do new things, sometimes I end up going alone. Not necessarily a bad thing but it makes me wonder about myself. Sometimes.
Sometimes I think I've been 'different' for so long, that it's just hard to fit in. I don't give up. And these solo excursions help me meet new people. I've lots of acquaintances. Now I'm looking to make a few real friends...
btw, freedomlover - you mentioned that you are from NY/NJ. Me, too!
Bergen County, NJ.
hopefully it will be a beautiful weekend.
we always get together with our entire family (kids and grandkids) for an all day picnic and fun and then watch the small town parades.
and then this weekend we will be playing "catch-up" with outdoor projects on the house that we couldn't get to because of the rain.
Good friend of mine, also ex-jw, will graduate with her masters degree. Big party on Sunday!!
Don't know about the rest of the weekend. Maybe finish some painting and unpacking here...?
-Aude.
i am america sign language teacher and a caretaker of a house near the beach.
what do you do for living?
Account Executive, Inside Sales
I sell orthopedic braces, supports and casting material to orthopedic clinics and hospitals, pharmacies and podiatrists.
any comments appreciated because i can't think clearly right now!
here's the story.... .
hubby and i married 5-1/2 years ago.
I would find a couple of friends and go by yourself.
I might could be your friend. Just have to renew my passport...!!...
I'd certainly be disappointed and don't think you are a bitch just because you want to travel. Seems that is part of the deal when getting married. Even if it wasn't, people grow and develop interests. You are not looking for a reason to leave him. Just want to see some other countries and cultures. A girls-only trip should make him happy.
-Aude.
today i must say good-bye to a friend i have known for 14 years.
sylvester was only four months old when he and his brother scout moved in with me - a dog person - and my australian shephard.
the kittens were supposed to be pets for the 10-year-old.
misspeaches - "If it gets bad don't be afraid to sing out to your friends here..." Just knowing this makes me feel better. I knew I could count on you. Hugs, chickadee.
Virgochik - 'I'm sorry' is sometimes all that can be said. Thank you so much for posting to my thread. It might sound trite, but I really do appreciate that so many people responded. It's helped me grieve.
Tres - The little garden pic reminds me of my little garden. It's a happy little place.
WhiteWaves - It's tough to lose a pet. I lost the other cat in October. Then broke up with the boyfriend in November. I cried more over the cat. Go figure!! Those little guys were just so loving. Thank you for your concern.
nsrn - My heart goes out to you. They just get so helpless and look to us to make them feel better. I wish I had done more research on the net (funny that I didn't) to learn more about Sylvester's illness and about other ways to help him. There were some simple tricks that I could have employed that would have made things easier for both of...
Again - Thank you all for posting to my thread. Although I don't post as much (as I did with my first 'AudeSapere' account), I still read much of what's here and truly thrive on the love and humanity shown on this site. I'm a better - or at least 'saner' - person for having found y'all.
Hugs and Love,
-Denise.
i was reading a post on here recently from some young guy who was never a witness but wanted some advice about a romantic situation and what struck me was his real guilt trip about sex, porn and masturbation.. .
what is the reason for attaching so much guilt to sex?
is it because we attach emotion to the closness of our sexual relationships?
It's actually nauseating to think about. I can't imagine a young girl going thru that. I was an elders daughter but mostly good. Well-behaved and a real good sneak. I was not privy to the details of JCs partly because kids thought I would share with my dad and partly because I believed that it was confidential and that the elders would maintain the dignity and confidence of those meetings.
Boy was I hoodwinked.
I had no clue. In my early/mid thirties a good friend was telling me about some JCs that her teenage girls were summoned to. It just didn't sound right to me and I thought she was exagerating. Those meetings really messed up those girls for a while. They told me that a few of the elders' daughters were even more involved then they were, but I really didn't believe them - too much. What a blind fool I was.
I'm really sickened by the senseless psychological and spiritual abuse heaped on those who have been so badly treated by bullying elders. And grateful for those elders who would not stoop to that base collusion. I know that there are/were many sincere elders who genuinely sought to shephard the flock in their care with love and respect and allowed individuals to maintain their dignity.
I'm appalled that there are so many stories of JC psychological abuse.
So happy to be out and thankful for not getting caught.
-Aude.
ok advice needed.
i am currently separated from my husband, have 2 children and we will end up divorcing.
i have met a man at work that i am getting a crush on.
I agree with undercover:
If you wanna have some fun and get it on...fine, but if you're thinking of him as Mr. Brady to your Mrs. Brady, I think that's a mistake. You need to let the divorces go through, find yourself, rediscover some of your interests and take things very slow for awhile. - italics added.
Especially since you married so young and have been mommy for a while, I truly believe it is critical for you to find yourself. Develop some of your own interests.
I don't think anyone mentioned the kids yet. I strongly suggest not meeting his kids or him meeting yours if you decide to have a fling or get romantically involved. Not just yet. Be discreet and wait until both divorces are final and until you know if there is possibility of longterm relationship. When kids are young, I just hate to see a stream of 'boyfriends' or 'girlfriends' parade thru the kids lives.
Maybe I'm jumping too far ahead, but I've seen and heard too many stories that make me feel sad for the kids.
-Aude.
i was reading a post on here recently from some young guy who was never a witness but wanted some advice about a romantic situation and what struck me was his real guilt trip about sex, porn and masturbation.. .
what is the reason for attaching so much guilt to sex?
is it because we attach emotion to the closness of our sexual relationships?
Looking Glass wrote: And as for wanting info, the JC always says it is to determine what type of sin has been committed, but truthfully it is so the old men can get it up without having to take their Viagra for the evening. It is their own form of erotica. - Italics added.
I had never even thought that elders were anything other than honestly concerned about the spiritual welfare of their flock. - UNTIL I started posting here and heard so many cynics. I honestly thought that people were exagerating or reading more into whatever was discussed.
THEN I got to have a real conversation with a few former elders. They got to talking and one admitted to really getting into the JCs with women confessing about sexual matters. It was disturbing to me.
Guess those cynical posters weren't / aren't so cynical afterall.
-Aude.
i was looking on ebay to find prices for what i should be selling our wonderful spritual food provided by jehovah...i mean the going rate on this crap and came across this guy.
bleck!.
http://stores.ebay.com/watchtower-treasure-hunt.
'Possession of' and 'reading/studying' said literature are not the same.
I took great pride in my collection but knew that the information was old light. Who had time to read any of that stuff anyway?? There was so much to do and read and study on my way to my nervous breakdown. Barely time to DUST the old books, let alone READ them.
But boy was I proud of that fine collection.
-Aude.
i was wondering... the sister i have been studying with and all the jw seem a bit strange.
i mean they tell me a lot of stuff, but make it seem logical... like everything is okay.
for example: instead of saying one should not have friends with non jws-- they will say... that i shouldn't get "too close" to those who do not praise jehovah.
Hi IFTNP -
Or is it something that is impulse? (they really think this way... vs. thinking "every non-JW is the Devil"
It's subtle persuasion. Most don't fully realize what they are saying as they say it. You will hear it phrased in so many ways at the meetings, too. All the time.
If they came out and said "All non-witnesses are following Satan and will be destroyed soon at Armageddon" - would you really keep studying? They try to soften what they really think so as not to scare you away. In reality, JWs have a true 'Us vs Them' mentality.
For now it's presented as 'something to consider.'
Later it will be 'something to watch out for'.
Then 'something to avoid'.
If/When you are a publisher, it will be one measure of your spirituality.
"Bad associations spoil useful habits" will become a mantra for you.
Don't remember if I'd said it before, but Welcome to JWD. It really is a good place to learn and 'be'. Whichever road you choose (you're 17 - you have many choices!), you will find support here. You may be challenged a bit, but you will be supported, too.
I enjoy your posts. Looking forward to more.
Aude Sapere (meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Wisdom/Knowledge)
