unbeliever, I usually don't respond to threads about raising children as I'm childless and my input would hold no water. But in this case I must speak up!
You're the parent in charge of your son's life and welfare and your mom willfully disrespected your wishes. She was sneaky and deceitful. Cutting her off is not cruel, it's protecting your precious son from harmful manipulation that would undermine the most important relationship he has right now: with his mommy. Maybe your mate doesn't understand the full thrust of the matter. Perhaps ask him to attend a few KH meetings so he can see for himself what his son will be exposed to... a toxic cloud of poison.
Tyrone said: I know that if I ever had a kid there's no way I'd ever let them see it.
Ditto! The WT encourages beating children into compliance. It is perfectly normal to see kids dragged down the aisle for any little infraction, hear their wails rise from the back of the hall, and then see them return, zombie-like and tear-stained. No one bats an eye at it. The churches of Christendom provide age-appropriate Sunday schools where children have fun while learning bible stories and that Jesus loves them no matter what. Huge difference.
SPAZnik, finding a way to "rise above the JW mentality of disfellowshipping people from your life" is out of the question for me. In fact, the happiest and most productive years of my life were spent avoiding my JW mother and her insidious control freaking. It's when I stopped studying and stopped attending meetings and moved out of the mentally and physically abusive family home that my life took off, and I ain't exactly dead yet (as I was told). When I started studying again a few years ago, it all fell apart. I knew my JW childhood was a horror story, but didn't realize how deep and dangerous it went because the abuse was so "normal."
It's much, much different for those who come in as adults and those of us who were raised in it. They can get in touch with who they were before the cult and move onwards and upwards. But there was no "me" before the cult. It's all I ever knew. It regulated my every thought and movement and social interaction and my JW mother reinforced it with death-threats and beatings. I was never allowed to just be "me."
It presents an identity crisis many years later. Depression, anxiety, OCD. Who would I be if there was no Watchtower inculcation? How can I use what I know now to warn and save others, without coming off hateful and bitter like Jehovah himself? Did I ever really have a mother? If I had kids, would I turn into her?
IMO, grandparents who meddle in the adult children's relationships and would sabotage the grandchildren's upbringing (religious or otherwise) deserve to be kept at arms length. In this case it's a life-saving matter.
Think of it this way: If a non-relative, hired babysitter ignored the parent's wishes and brought the child in harm's way, s/he would be fired on the spot, charges may be brought, and no one would question the parent's good judgement.
~Sue (sorry so long, end of rant)
betterdaze
JoinedPosts by betterdaze
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100
My mom took my son to KH after I told her not to
by unbeliever inreal shock i know that a jw would do that.
i found out today that my mom took my son to the kh behind my back when she was in town visiting.
he's just a little baby so he will have no memories of it.
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betterdaze
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Glass Clinking Still from Satan per latest QFR
by Open mind inmy wife and i have for many years thought that glass clinking was soon going to go the way of wind chimes and pinatas.
we were both blown away by the recent "questions from readers" saying that toasting is still the work of the devil and not for christians.. i even had an elder in my hall admit the logic didn't really hold up.
anyway, i thought it was definitely "food at the proper time" .
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betterdaze
Imagine if two anointed ones at the Memorial clinked their glasses in reverence to Jesus before partaking?
~Sue -
101
BREAKING NEWS: 16:.02: FOSTER MOTHER GUILTY OF ABUSE
by fokyc inhttp://www.gloucestershireecho.co.uk/displaynode.jsp?nodeid=139760&command=displaycontent&sourcenode=139586&contentpk=16917608&folderpk=80785&pnodeid=139317.
date : 20.03.07. foster mother eunice spry has been found guilty of subjecting children in her care to two decades of horrific abuse.. the 62-year-old, from tewkesbury, beat them, fed them rat droppings, stopped them sleeping and rubbed their faces with sandpaper.
she thrust sticks down their throats when they misbehaved and made them eat dog food.. one daughter was forced to use a wheelchair for four years even though she was perfectly able to walk.. doctors, teachers and neighbours raised constant concerns about spry's treatment of the children but nothing was ever done by social services.. the catalogue of abuse only came to light when one of the children went to the jehovah's witness elders at the church the family attended.. spry, from tewkesbury, was found guilty of 26 charges of cruelty after a three week trial at bristol crown court.
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betterdaze
undercover, they do not mention a husband or father in the home.
If you are single mother or wife of an unbelieving mate, your kids are as good as invisible to the congregation.
I know whereof I speak. No one noticed my mother's abuse, and in fact ignored her aberrant behavior. Those who may have noticed simply did not care.
Kids of single moms or wives with UBM's are at the lower end of the Kingdom Hall food chain, just above the disfellowshipped sitting in the back who no one will speak to.
~Sue -
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Jehovah's Witnesses and Myspace
by tsunami_rid3r ini haven't been to a meeting in ages.
whats the rules on getting on myspace?
i ask because i added a friend of mine from my past congregation because he was cool with me, but later he removed me from his friends list.
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betterdaze
Perhaps someone can post a scan of the March 2007 Awake! entitled, "Meeting the Needs of Today's Youth."
Article 1: Youths Online!
Article 2: Helping Youths Meet the Challenge
Subheads:
A Social Revolution
Online Social Networks — Harmless?
The Darker Side of Cyberspace
Growing Public Concern
Negative Affects
Beware the "Wisdom of the World!"
Sidebar: Social Networking / One Girl's Story
~Sue -
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If you could have over 3 people over for Dinner.
by new boy inliving or dead who would they be?.
1. jeaus.
2. egar cayce.
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betterdaze
Today?
Those 3 kids on the recent thread, "Foster Mother Guilty of Abuse."
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/8/131197/1.ashx
I would shower them with all the love and attention and REAL food they could handle, and
then we'd go walk it off at the mall shopping for missed Christmas and Birthday presents!
~Sue -
101
BREAKING NEWS: 16:.02: FOSTER MOTHER GUILTY OF ABUSE
by fokyc inhttp://www.gloucestershireecho.co.uk/displaynode.jsp?nodeid=139760&command=displaycontent&sourcenode=139586&contentpk=16917608&folderpk=80785&pnodeid=139317.
date : 20.03.07. foster mother eunice spry has been found guilty of subjecting children in her care to two decades of horrific abuse.. the 62-year-old, from tewkesbury, beat them, fed them rat droppings, stopped them sleeping and rubbed their faces with sandpaper.
she thrust sticks down their throats when they misbehaved and made them eat dog food.. one daughter was forced to use a wheelchair for four years even though she was perfectly able to walk.. doctors, teachers and neighbours raised constant concerns about spry's treatment of the children but nothing was ever done by social services.. the catalogue of abuse only came to light when one of the children went to the jehovah's witness elders at the church the family attended.. spry, from tewkesbury, was found guilty of 26 charges of cruelty after a three week trial at bristol crown court.
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betterdaze
(from a link in the article)
Here is a summary of the abuses and the key events which led to her conviction.
1986
Victim A is born and moves into the Spry household. She was officially adopted at the age of five.
Early 90s
In 1992, Victim B moves into the Spry household in May while Victim C arrives in June. They are both living there under a private fostering arrangement.
Eunice Spry is seen on a number of occasions squeezing four-year-old Victim A and pinning a notice to her back saying: "This child is evil, she wets the bed, do not speak to her, she is an attention seeker."
Mid 1990s
Spry decides to teach all the children at home in 1994. The prosecution said this was so that no-one would see the childrens' injuries.
The family move into a farmhouse left to Spry by a man who she had been caring for since the late 1980s. The family start renovating it in 1995.
Victim B first tries to run away when she is eight years old. She tries to escape a total of three times, the last time being when she was 13, but is found by police and returned home.
Victim A writes letters saying: "I'm aged nine - can I live with you?"
Victim B throws letters and diaries over the neighbours' wall saying how bad things are. She also tells her teachers she is having problems at home. Social Services visits the home.
September 2000
Victim A is badly hurt in a car accident and spends three months in Frenchay Hospital in Bristol. She has to use a wheelchair but is expected to walk again in six months.
Four years later she is still in the wheelchair. Spry prevented her from walking so that she could claim more money in compensation.
2003
Victim B leaves home. Spry drives her to Bristol Youth Hostel and gives her some money.
2004
Victim C goes to live with his grandparents while Victim A leaves home when she can walk again.
2005
In January, Victim A goes to the police detailing all the attacks she had suffered at the hands of Spry.
In the summer, Spry visits Victim C at work and threatens him. She also calls, texts and writes him letters - some are threatening while others say how much she loves him.
Throughout September and October, the three victims are examined by doctors who find internal scarring which prove she did force sticks down their throats as a form of punishment.
2007
The jury at Bristol Crown Court find Spry guilty of 26 charges of child abuse. -
40
JWs and the weird way they say Happy Birthday
by reneeisorym inyou who don't know -- i'm daed but my mother still sends me very short e-mail about every two months.. this morning she sent me an email that said:.
25 today.
it would be sooooo wrong for someone to say -- "happy birthday" .. but its fine to mention that i am 25 today.
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betterdaze
YES, I would have loved it!
I've got about a year to pick out a big, pink, frilly, girly-girl B-Day dress. Maybe hire a magician, too.
~Sue -
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The Atheist's Wager
by nvrgnbk inthe following is the athiest's wager, given in response to pascal's wager( a flawed appeal to inspire worship):.
you should live your life and try to make the world a better place for your being in it, whether or not you believe in god.
if there is no god, you have lost nothing and will be remembered fondly by those you left behind.
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betterdaze
Hitler and Stalin tried to make the world a better place. So does King George the Bush.
Many they left behind are dead, rendered incapable of remembering fondly or otherwise.
~Sue -
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JWs and the weird way they say Happy Birthday
by reneeisorym inyou who don't know -- i'm daed but my mother still sends me very short e-mail about every two months.. this morning she sent me an email that said:.
25 today.
it would be sooooo wrong for someone to say -- "happy birthday" .. but its fine to mention that i am 25 today.
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betterdaze
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Renee!
So they're not invited for the Moon Jump and pony rides when I turn 40 ;-)
~Sue -
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Ghosts and using God's name
by Quexinos inokay im just gonna ask my question because i'm curious.
i'm still not even sure if there are actual witnesses here or just people aruging with them (some people have too much free time) .
see lately i've been watching this show "a haunting" and a lot of the episodes are the same.
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betterdaze
Proverbs 18:10
The name of the LORD is a strong tower;
the righteous run to it and are safe.
The name is used figuratively. Compare with 2 Samuel 22:3,51; Psalms 18:2; 61:3; 144:2 and you'll see it's not advice to invoke "Jehovah" as ammunition against "wicked spirit forces." It's about how Jehovah protects the righteous, those who keep his commandments, and is figuratively, a place of refuge.
At the time this was written shepherds used towers to watch over their flocks, and would herd the flocks into the towers for protection. Also at that time, the name of YHWH was not uttered out of respect for the divine name. The average Hebrew was probably not using it as a talisman to repel demons. Just my opinion.
The Witnesses have an unhealthy obsession with wicked spirits (as well as the name Jehovah). They use this as a mechanism to keep you studying with them... if you stop, you will have demon attacks, so say this magical name and they will flee. Anything that keeps you from getting baptized is the demons fault, and anything bad that happens after you're baptized is the demons fault, too. It's control through fear, and a copout to avoid taking any personal responsibility for their lives. It's very sad and very effective.
What's interesting is that the Hebrew scriptures don't really mention demons or demon attacks, though Jehovah cruelly allowed Satan to mess with Job. The demons were busiest possessing people when Jesus was on the scene. Later, his apostles were able to drive out demons with the aid of the Holy Spirit sent to them by Jesus. Jehovah did not figure in.
BTW, Jesus didn't call on Jehovah, he used Abba, Father.
If the Witnesses continue to haunt you, ask to be put on their Do Not Call list, or put up a No Trespassing sign. If you seriously have a problem with angry ghosts, ask the elders at your local Kingdom Hall for help. One of the first things they'll tell you is to stop watching TV shows about ghosts!
~Sue