my daughter and i were discussing jw doctrine, on the long trip home from skiing.
she is sooo glad she has a normal life.
we also discussed buzz words, and what jw's think about many things.
Well, I thought I would use this thread to show off my little girls name who was just born on 2/5/07, her name is Delanie Parker, we call her "Lanie" for short, umm and "winkers"...there is a reason but I do not want to take up too much time on this thread...just a proud mommy.
Nikki
i do not attend the same hall as my boyfriend because he is currently reproved for being involved with me.
i'm not a witness.
he confessed to his elders that he had sex with someone outside of marriage after his second divorce was already final.
emilyblue, just to clarify one thing. You did a bad thing when it comes to JWism, not real life. There are worse things that could happen. If you already know your realtionship is unstable, then get out while you can (I realize when you love someone, its easier said then done). Honestly, the major reason why he is unstable is probably because of being a Jehovahs Witness.
Hang in there!
Come to the forum for support!
Nikki
2 witnesses from the kh stopped by today.
i did the hide and not answer the door!
i know, i'm a big chicken!
I honestly am hoping they come to my door. They did when the tract campaign thing came out with the tract. It was an elderly woman with a child. I expected them to sound like me when I was a regular pioneer. Yet, this woman hardly said anything at all, nothing that would catch my attention. She said a little bit about the tract, took a few seconds. I was hoping she was going to ask me a few questions, like I used to. Like, are you a bible reader? She seemed like she was quick to leave...I was looking forward to a challenge.
Oh well, they'll come around, when it happens, I will let you know what happens.
Nikki
i do not attend the same hall as my boyfriend because he is currently reproved for being involved with me.
i'm not a witness.
he confessed to his elders that he had sex with someone outside of marriage after his second divorce was already final.
Emilyblue,
You may want to think about this relationship, put aside the whole JW thing. Your JW significant other does not seem like he is stable/has some major issues. Even if you were to become a JW, do you really think you will be happy with him? It seems so dramatic, yet I do not know entire story.
Good luck, yes you did a very bad thing in JWism. You will have to face it. Really though, do you really feel it was right for him to tell you that he will only marry you if you become a JW? Does this seem strange to you? Maybe from one JW to another, its not strange. Just based on the little you have mentioned, I would really re-think your relationship with him. Too much drama.
Nikki
this statement was often echeod to me during my formative years.
i remember my very first day of elementary school (stateside) at the age of 4. my parents were flustered because they couldn't believe they actually had to start their only child into public school to begin with; after all, the end was right around the corner!
this was 1984, the year the first apple mac was introduced, 80's music was loud and in your face, the delorean was cool, and miami vice was just in production.
I did not have natural intelligence but if I applied myself, I did well. I was also an only child. My parents never pushed me to do better in school. As long as I passed, I never heard boo. They never asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I grew up thinking higher education was not necessary. Even when I was 16-17, there were a couple of girls I knew that regular pioneered and went to college! My parents looked down on them, and you know what? I did too. Why? Because they were going to college.
My mom and dad never said any like "you will never finish school in this system of things", they just never said anything about school period. When I found myself interested in something, they would come along and take it away right under my feet. I was so confused, I had not done anything wrong, yet they said I had to stop doing what I was doing.
Just thinking about what I mentioned above makes me want to stop thinking about it.
Sorry....Nikki
PS: I was really trying to let wing commander know that I understand completely...
last year, i bought a few movies for my 16 year old niece when i went on vacation, among them was the movie "the chronicles of narnia (the lion, the witch and the wardrobe).
a few days later my brother called and said that he would like if i came by to pick up the movie as they would not allow their daughter to watch that movie.
(my brother is an elder) when i went to his house the movie was left virtually the same place that i had left it.
Ok, I think a big part of why JWs have a problem with "Narnia" is because it actually has a religious background. Im 33 years old and had never heard of the "Narnia" books either, they sell in religious book stores. I believe the lion represents Jesus, and the witch in the signifies Satan. At least this is what my grandmother recently told me. Perhaps the JWs feel this movie is not a good representation of the bible.
I loved Narnia and so did my kids, we own it on DVD. Its one of my favorite movies. As for Harry Potter series, we own those too and I love watching them with my kids. Can't wait to see Harry Potter 5!
Nikki
so, i go to my jw uncle's funeral for obvious reasons!
after the funeral my family invites me to dinner, something we haven't done for some time (probably 8 years or so) as i'm considered disassociated not disfellowshipped.
i guess this is allowed per the new jw policy but since that crap changes from time to time i'm not sure.
I know its difficult to put yourself back in the JW way of thinking, but your family reacting this way is because they are BRAINWASHED and live in fear of their life. To us, it seems simple, how could they think shunning is OK and agreeable? This is what I used to ask myself about my parents shunning their only child (me of course). Yet, the strong JWs really think/or go along with it because of fear, they are doing the right thing. Its amazing to me really. I ve been out for almost 15 years, and I am still affected by the cult. I keep coming to JWD to make sure I have made the right decision, crazy.
Hang in there.
Nikki
i first want to thank you all for your support over the past few days.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/131534/1.ashx.
i did finally get a reply from my dad (after a week and a half) and i almost wish i hadn't.
Dear unique1,
I understand this completely, (if you review some of my previous comments, you will know some of my story). Im 33 years old, and I too am an only child. I left home/the org when I was 18, full time pioneer. I had to leave in a cold way in order to succeed in getting out. But it was gut wrenching, I was so hurt that my parents shunned me once I was DF'd. I have not seen my dad since October of 1992 and my mom and I did not see each other from Oct 1992 to Sept 2000. My dad is no longer my father, at least I do not view him that way. My mom on the other hand got out of the org, thats why we were able to reunite in 2000. In the beginning, my mom suffered from the after effects of getting out of the org, but day by day, month by month, year by year, she healed. It was a dream come true to be reunited with her again, I never would have thought she would come around.
My parents when both were shunning me, were very cold. It hurt so bad. I got through it though and lived my life. I have children of my own now (I just had a little girl on 2/5/07, Delanie Parker, its my third) and I never tell them what to believe in, I would never shun them. I really do not know how my parents went all those years without seeing me, I honestly felt at times, they did not love me. Yet, when my mom and I talk about this, they went through agony shunning me. My mom got depressed, they then had marital problems, my mom soon became an alchoholic, as for my father, I personally think he is mentally ill. So, even though I was feeling this pain, my parents did what they thought was right to be faithful to Jehovah, to the org, but at the same time, they suffered because I left. This took a long time for me to understand. Eventually, I got over it, and continued to go on with my life, and make it better. I wanted to be happy with or without contact with my parents.
So, I understand 100% how you feel and so do so many others here.
Nikki
it's been a long time since i left the borg and jw matters are rarely discussed with my jw relatives.
i am however, interested in the subject of pioneers.
a few years back i half expected my nephew to do some pioneering, but he opted to get married at 19 to a fellow dub and it wasn't long before they had 3 little girls to support.
In my hall and in my area growing up, it WAS looked upon as a wonderful/spiritual/getting Jehovah's blessing/setting an example type of thing...My mom was a pioneer, dad was an elder. I pioneered to make my parents happy, it kept peace at home until I made my escape.
Nikki
seeing as the new system of things is taking it's sweet time getting here to restore everyone's youthful appearance,
Yes, I would have plastic surgery if I decided to have something done, why not??? Yet, the good news is that I am 33 years old, I have three children and I do not feel the need to have anything done anytime soon. Just had a baby girl on 2/5/07. Plus, plastic surgery may be less expensive by the time I felt the want to get something done. But, if I were to do something now, it would definitely be new "boobies". I have also lost my boobs to children (but worth it) but if and when it does happen, I think I want a C cup but not sure.
I m 5 ft and 1/2 tall and big boobs will not look right on me. While I was on maternity leave, in the middle of the night I would watch fashion TV shows and one show I watched was to check if your boobs are sagging, take a pencil and see if it will stay. Well, I did not have a pencil but I had tweezers! Guess what? It stayed there!! Yet, I am only an A cup now even though I just gave birth on 2/5, and I was able to hold the tweezers with my boobs, this is when I decided that I really want a boobie job, my "girls" to me are basically some skin hanging there, Ha. I enjoy making fun of myself so do not think that I am so upset about my saggie pieces of skin. In the mean time, I buy good bras. My husband is the only one who sees me naked anyway and as long as I take care of him, if you know what I mean, my boobs really do not mean anything to him at that particular moment, HA!!! I am cracking myself up.
When I do get my new boobs that go with my body, I will let you all know. Hope you enjoyed learned a little about my "girls", I have been wanting to get this off my chest for a long time.
Nikki
