Posts by Quandry

43

lost

by depressed in

just wondering if anyone else feels the same way.. i've been out of the organization for about 4 years, but i still love jehovah and jesus, and i want to serve them the right way.

does anyone here feel a great sense of religious confusion now that you are not attending meetings?.

at the moment, i feel miserable, since i'm going through a divorce.

Ps . Please realize most opinions in here are Apostate opinions of people who didnt recover , or worse ....fornicators , adulterers , themselves ( 1 Cor 6 :9, 10 ) And It would a shame to mix with them either in there ideas or pursuites , for the results would be as negative as their ideas .

Oh, really?

Well, Yes I would say that there are people on this board who did not recover-how does one recover when their child is told that they are filth in God's eyes and that they will burn in the fire with the devil and his angels? One appeals to the WTS who then backs the men who did this, says they must have "learned their lesson" (although no action was taken against them) and that her father and I are causing divisions because we refuse to be "friends" with these men.

My husband was an elder at the time. Our family was the one that headed to the bathrooms to clean faithfully, always used our car in service, never had hobbies or did anything other than "theocratic" pursuits. You know the type. These elders further lied in a meeting to have my husband removed as elder, stating that my daughter had a pattern of drinking and he should have known it, even though they knew that she tasted alcohol twice in a three week period, and NEVER GOT DRUNK. They said other hurtful lies as well.

The result? My husband developed psoriasis all over his arms and legs, I got shingles across my back -great when you have to wear a brassiere to work- and when whe was disfellowshipped my daughter had hives day and night for five weeks. We had one short appeal meeting but never a promised second one because it was "TOO INCONVENIENT TO GET EVERYONE TOGETHER. My daughter is in therapy now.

My husband and I are still not disfellowshipped. I am sure we will be soon, however, because we refuse to keep their dirty little secrets of how many children are treated in the infamous "back room" of the Hall.

Since that time, of course, I found this forum and also found that the treatment meted out to my child was not an isolated incident. Many others have had the misery of the same "loving concern and spiritual help" of bullies such as these. Then of course, I found to my complete dissilutionment that the WTS had joined itself to the United Nation as NGO, had promoted this organization in the Awake magazine, and various other goodies, such as using contributions to the worldwide work to defend child molesters.

Yes, I mix in company with the ones on this forum. I feel they are better company than hypocrites who claim to love, but treat people that Jesus died for as worthless. Why do you mix in company here?

43

lost

by depressed in

just wondering if anyone else feels the same way.. i've been out of the organization for about 4 years, but i still love jehovah and jesus, and i want to serve them the right way.

does anyone here feel a great sense of religious confusion now that you are not attending meetings?.

at the moment, i feel miserable, since i'm going through a divorce.

Quandry

What you are going through is being allowed by Jehovah for a possible reason of justified purification of his people

Well, now we have it. The fault is obviously yours. If you were to go to the elders this would be their take, I'm sure. You must not have fulfilled your role as wife in a theocratic way. No matter what your husband did you could have prevented it by being a better meeting attender, going out in service more, being in subjection more, etc.

I'm guessing "help" like this is why you have not been to meetings for a few years. My sixteen year old daughter was accused for two and one half hours of committing fornication, something she did not do, and elders said there was no accusation of. They showed their love for her by berating and humiliating her, and then finally calling her a liar, making her read a scripture that she was filth in God's eyes and would burn in the fire with the devil and his angels. They disfellowshipped her, and said, "AND IF YOU ARE STILL DISFELLOWSHIPPED WHEN ARMAGEDDON COMES, YOU CAN TAKE SOME COMFORT IN KNOWING THAT JEHOVAH CAN READ HEARTS.

After much complaining to the Circuit overseer, the District overseer, and an appeal committee, we were told we should "ACCEPT WHAT HAPPENED BECAUSE GOD HAS ALLOWED IT."

I would encourage you to stay close to YOUR family-not your soon to be ex's. I would encourage you to have honest discussions with your husband. Why does he not admit to having an affair with this woman? Are you beyond any doubts that he did? I know the harmful effects of assuming someone is a liar and falsely accusing them.

If he did have an affair, and there is no way that you can work things out, then I encourage you to take charge of your life. Have you completed your education? If not, this is the opportune time. It is also a way of meeting new people-not in a club. Also, you could do some type of volunteer work. This will make you feel better about yourself, and give you a sense of accomplishment. There are programs everywhere to help people learn to read, or learn English, or other charitable organizations.

Please regroup, realize that you are a valuable person. Jesus views you as such. Read through many of the posts on this forum as to why we are no longer going to any Kingdom Halls. You will learn much.

Do not allow posters such as the one who said the above words to you make you feel as though God is doing this to you because you need to be punished and "refined." Chin up. We care about you.

157

Judicial Committee Preparation

by Marvin Shilmer in

jw
friends

judicial committee preparation.

recently a friend inquired about how to best prepare for a judicial committee hearing from the prospective of the subject individual.

at a minimum i recommend the following:.

Quandry

You know, no one could really understand what the men on a judicial committee are capable of unless they have had dealings with them. Men on my straight A grade, never been in trouble teen daughter's committee accused her of fornication for over two hours after telling my elder husband that there was no accusation, no witness, and no confessionof it. They told her they would not believer her. They had determined in advance that this is what she had done. They made her read one condemning scripture after another to try to get her to admit it. They accused her of theft, of being in a gang, of being a lesbian because "little girl's sleepovers are lesbian training centers" and told another family in the congregation that she had committed fornication. They lied to my child, humiliated her, demeaned her, and treated her like @#$%. They made her read a scripture that she was filth in God's eyes, and would burn in the lake of fire with the devil.

They are not a court nor do they claim to be one. Once the door is closed on the back room, "ABANDON HOPE ALL YE WHO ENTER" is the only rule.

Do you really think you can get a fair hearing if you ask to appeal the decision? In my daughter's case we asked for an appeal because of the horrendous way she was treated. We went to the Kingdom Hall where the original committee sat and three "impartial" men on the appeal committee. After I began to report the way my child was treated, the chairman said we must close the meeting and meet again. FOR MONTHS WE WAITED AND ASKED FOR THE SECOND MEETING. Excuse after excuse was given. Finally, we were called to a meeting with the appeal committee and told that the WTS had upheld the decision to df my daughter. Do you know the reason why we did not have the second appeal meeting? IT WAS TOO INCONVENIENT TO GET EVERYONE TOGETHER!!!!!!!!!

Believe me, if I did not have this personal knowledge of what went on, I would not have believed it was possible. If you think civil authority's rules of any sort apply or are meaningful to this organization you are mistaken.

51

Caption Time Again - Hobbies are a Waste of Time

by jgnat in

jw
friends

breaking in my new scanner here.

this is another image that captured my eye, an august 2004 wt.

the caption reads: "some have eliminated certain hobbies and nonessential personal projects" can you come up with a better one?

Quandry

"What were we thinking? This might be an enjoyable thing our family could do together. We can't have that. It is untheocratic."

51

Caption Time Again - Hobbies are a Waste of Time

by jgnat in

jw
friends

breaking in my new scanner here.

this is another image that captured my eye, an august 2004 wt.

the caption reads: "some have eliminated certain hobbies and nonessential personal projects" can you come up with a better one?

Quandry

"We don't have time for this hobby. 1975 will be here soon and the end of this system. Let's go out in service and tell people because the end is imminent."

47

1:09am and the frickin' meeting tomorrow!

by 5thGeneration in

jw
friends

just want to chill out.

sleep in.

get up at 11 and make some spam 'n eggs.

Quandry

You know, I think telling your wife you would like a "family day" next Sunday would be just the thing. Tell her you want to make the spam and eggs while she is in bed,and bring them to her, then you want all the family to take a walk together and then you want to teach your kids how to hit a baseball or some similar activity. (Sorry,the football game may not be in the running)

What mom does not want dad to spend time with the kids? After a relaxing day that all have enjoyed, it will be easier next time to find an activity that conflicts with the meeting time, and easier to get the family to agree.

Many have helped family out. Have patience. A family is a treasure. Tread carefully.

19

Elders Visits

by Jobees in

one thing that i hear regularly is that once an individual is d-effed they are visited once a year by elders to see where they stand.

in 8 years i have not had one visit, and they know where i live.

is this how the elders are supposed to be?

Quandry

Once a year two elders may visit certain disfellowshipped ones. These may no longer show a rebellious attitude or be engaged in gross sin and may need help to take the necessary steps to get reinstated.—Matthew 24:45; Ezekiel 34:16.

Well, that explains it. Some are deemed worthy of a visit, and some are just deemed buzzard bait. My teen daughter was df'd by a horrendously nasty committee. We talked to the D.O. and the C.O. The C.O. intimated that he felt bad about the treatment and said that he would write a letter to my daughter, encouraging her to come back, as we explained that she could not handle a meeting in the back room with more "men". After a few months, we realized that no letter would be coming...................

I

30

Okay, here's my story.

by sundawn77 in

jw
friends

hey all.. first of all i want to say that i am really impressed by the warm atmosphere that this board provides.

i remember when i was little and we learned about non-witnesses, and they were portrayed as children-eating, blood-drinking criminals.

okay, i exaggerate, but the connotations were there!.

Quandry

Thank you for posting your story.

I was wondering, do your parents know the kind of humiliating, intensely personal questions the elders asked? What was the purpose of delving into the position you used and precisely where he touched you? Do your parents know how they made you feel? I feel that they should know all the sordid questioning used. How were these "spiritual shepherds" attempting to "help" you and "restore" you to the congregation by the demeaning way they treated you? Rest assured you are not the first to be asked these type of questions and unfortunately will not be the last. My own teenage daughter was accused of fornication for over two hours even though she had not committed it. They called her a liar and she was disfellowshipped, after brutally degraded treatment.

Please continue on the good course you are on. We on this forum are proud of you, as I'm sure many others are.

I am thinking that deep down your parents are proud of your accomplishments but are so blinded by the dogmatism of the WTS that they are not able to express it. Someday I hope they will. You have excelled in your studies. You are a contributing member of society. You mention that you have been the wonderful daughter that even helped your parents out of financial binds.

It is natural to want the approval of your parents. I am so sorry that they have not expressed to you their pride in you. You deserve it very much. I am sorry you had to go through what you did with the men in the back room. Rest assured you are a precious person in the eyes of God and Jesus. Even though I am through with the WTS I still believe that all of us have worth in the eyes of God, and that Jesus loves us all.

Some days are down for all of us who were mistreated by the ones who should have shown love love for us if they truly were God's people. Some days are better. I hope that you begin to have more "better" days.

Please pm me anytime you need encouragement. I would like to be there for you.

21

My husband is back in the hospital

by MsMcDucket in

he has a gi bleed.

they were unable to find any bleeding in his stomach today.

so tomorrow, they will be doing a colonoscopy.

Quandry

I will be thinking of you. I spent many days and nights in the hospital with my mother. She came through some harrowing operations and is still here at 83. You can rest assured that God sees the care you give your husband and is pleased. We have a treasure if we have family that loves us.

29

What the hell is the WTS saying about evolution now?

by Santisimo in

did anyone read the recent wts "special article" about creation and evolution?

i read it and fell of my freaking seat.

get this, the wts now believes (and yes, they want everyone to agree or else) that god created the universe billions of years ago and that nothing was created in six days as shown in genesis!.

Quandry

In all fairness, the WTS has not said that the literal earth is just a few thousand years old. What they have asserted is that it was a lifeless ball until about 49,000 years ago when God began to create life on it. Then the creative days began. Light from the sun began to shine through the haze, etc. etc. and the animals were created several thousand years later, and then man, a little over 6,000 years ago.

Unfortunately, this does not address the issue of dinosaurs, fossils, and life forms that have been proven to exist millions of years ago. Then there were saber-toothed tigers and wooly mammoths, etc. and the evidence of early man. This shows that more than many thousands of years have passed since life began on earth. At the same time, it shows that the creative days could not possibly have been merely seven literal days, either. This could not account for all the fossil evidence, some millions of years old.

Science, particularly geology and paleontology, have come a long way in the past one hundred years in finding out much of the history of our planet, and uncovering secrets of plate movement, layers of rock, ages of rock, and dating of fossil finds. In fact, those of us who have now gone to college and studied these things have found out many "truths" that show that the WTS position of thousands of years for a creative time period is lacking in substance.

Again, though, to be fair, they did not say that the literal earth is only a few thousand years old. They are guilty of enough without adding these charges to the mix.