I have to disagree with you on that one. Its no secret that there is a shortage of men in congregations, or maybe I should say "willing" men. As an Elder, I can't just start randomly missing meetings.
So you can't stop because they need you so much?
They have lied to you, and used you, but you feel like you owe them something.
That's what high control groups do, they make you feel guilty, unworthy, and beholden.