done4good

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Posts by done4good

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  44

  The cost of going undercover to help family and friends - Is it worth it?

  by BonaFide in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so all of you that are trying to help your family and friends as a disassociated person, or disfellowshipped, or sort-of-shunned.. what do you think about getting reinstated or reactivated to help them get out?.

  the time invested would be two meetings a week, about 6 hours total including driving.

  for those on the outside, you would have to get reinstated, so you would need 2-3 months of going to meetings making sure the elders see you and know your intention.. add field service in there.

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  done4good

  That's the first post I have seen from Terry in a while, and a damn good one!

  BF: Think about what he has posted. It's the truth.

  j
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  23

  is it really worth trying to change their minds?

  by homeschool in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after reading steven hassan's book, i really believe the jw's are in a high mind control group, like so many other cult-like religions.

  one point stuck out to me though....hassan said he will not do interventions if the purpose is selfishly motivated.

  i don't know why, but it's made me question some things.

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  done4good

  There is nothing wrong with planting "seeds", but it is she that has to want to see the Borg for what it is.

  My experience tells me it is best to live a happy life yourself, and let those on the outside see the improvement having left the borg makes in your life.

  When they are ready, they will come.

  j
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  38

  Did being raised a JW retard your career or cost you BIG $$$?

  by The Berean in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was offered a journalism scholarship at ohio state ... mom made me turn it down cause "armageddonwas near"... ended up a janitor!

  .

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  done4good

  I was one of the "lucky" ones, I suppose. Like most jws, I did not prepare for college, and found myself in a very dead end job post HS graduation. However, I had a good liberal jw friend, (very successful), insist I enroll in University, after that summer. I half-heartedly went, knowing truly I had no other choice. This was about a year before the WTS softened their views on higher ed, so I kept a low profile.

  Three years later I finished by B.S. in Telecommunications, (took two full credit summers to finish early), and began my IT/Telecom career. It has served me well, I current am working as the lead engineer for NYC's 911 project, (the world's largest), with a very good salary, and relative security.

  Yes, lucky. Many of my jw freinds did not fare nearly as well. The WTS society's views on higher ed DOES destroy people's lives.

  j
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  52

  Witness 007 returns to wife and meetings..I give up! Sorry no choice!

  by Witness 007 in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  my wife's been having mental problems since hurting her back at work...we split for 8 weeks {her doing} then she rings me and says she "can't cope and is lonely" so i return {the drama continues} she seems more stable, sleeping all night...what a change!

  her mood had become alittle more stable.

  she found a part time job, and has not been dragged off by security like her last job...much improved though she dropped 10 kilos in weight.

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  done4good

  I'm going to go out on a limb here, sorry. I truly do not believe in stepping into ANYONES marital or family situation, but...

  I simply cannot respect having no self respect. Your wife is important. But so are you. Stand up for what you know is right.

  j
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  29

  Why do they never invite you for a meal but always encourage you to attend meetings?

  by truthseeker in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  today, an elder in my hall phoned and left a message saying he would stop by with a memorial invitation.. this elder has never bothered to encourage me in the past when i was missing meetings, yet suddenly he remembers me in the run up to the memorial.. i got to thinking about this - a few in our congregation called us when they found out we were inactive, encouraging us to go back to meetings.

  or they would say, "it's the co visit next week, you have to come listen to his talk.".

  i would give these "genuine ones" their due - they made an effort - but, when i think about it what effort have they actually made?.

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  done4good

  TS,

  By now you know how these folks are. It's all they know how to do.

  I have a very good friend. (you probably know who I'm talking about), who won't invite me or wifey over for ANYTHING, (He knows damn well I'm doing much better since I'm out). He is way too scared to hear the "real" truth. He probably knows the real truth.

  I'm convinced that "knowing" doesn't matter. Peple stay in for various reasons, and those reasons don't have to make logical sense. There is no reason to bang your head into a wall over it. It's a matter of cognitive dissonance and other forms of warped psychology.

  Do yourself a huge favor and move on. You are in a good place. Please believe that.

  j
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  79

  How Long Have you Been Out of the Witnesses ? Have you Moved On ?

  by flipper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have been out over 5 years now.

  i feel we all start healing at different speeds depending on how much hurt we went through in exiting ; and how much we've educated ourselves about how and why we were sucked in by a mind control cult.

  at first i felt anger towards the organization , but after learning about mind control within 3 years of leaving the cult i felt sorry for those who are still trapped inside the witnesses being deceived.

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  done4good

  Mentally out by summer of '05, although serious doubts and emotional disintrest in the religion began in earnist in 2001. Walked away in Dec 2005, and never looked back.

  Life is good. Good career, new wonderful wife, and family, and good true friends.

  I don't miss the relationships at the hall in the least, anymore.

  Jason V.
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  25

  JW top a "Belief in demon activity" poll

  by inkling in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  a recent article in the new york times on bobby jindal's amateur .

  exorcist experience.... http://blow.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/02/28/bobby-jindal-the-exorcist-pro-or-con/ .

  quotes a survey that asked people of various religious groups.

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  done4good

  It's a common misconception amongst Christians that Jews believe in demonic entities the same way Christians do. For the most part, Jews do not believe in a literal 'Satan the Devil' in the same way Christians do. While conceding that there could be dark forces out there, they do not take the figure that was introduced in the Garden of Eden or in the story of Job as being literal.

  Yeah, I guess this is somewhat new to me, and I am glad it came up.
  
  But didn't the Jews of the Bible take those things literally? Jesus sure did!
  (and I seem to recall him being somewhat Jewish...) And, he cast demons out
  of Jews of his time, who clearly had no problem believing epilepsy was caused
  by demonic possession...
  
  So why did the Jews "grow out" of this foolishness, but most Christians have yet to?

  [inkling]

  This is where the whole bible thing all begins to fall apart. To better understand the ancient Hebrew period, do some research on two things:

  Elohist

  Jahwist

  The whole disconnect concerning the early Jews, (and their connection to everything else that came later, including Christianity), will begin to make a lot more sense.

  j
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  32

  ExJWs either BAs or atheists -- do you agree?

  by parakeet in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a week or two ago, a poster (i forget who; sorry) noted that exjws tend to fall into two camps -- born-again christians or atheists/agnostics.

  there doesn't appear to be much of a middle ground, e.g.

  joining a traditional, mainstream religion.. the observation has some merit to it.

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  done4good

  I am agnostic. I don't consider that even similar to atheist. It's not some weak, mealy-mouthed position, as many atheists consider it to be, either.

  It is honest. I don't know IF god or gods exist. Science and empiracal evaluation do not support the existence of such, but nor do they disprove it.

  Life is a learning experience. Approach things that way, and you will realize what really makes people happy.

  j
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  15

  HOW LONG BEFORE JWS STOP GROWING?

  by badboy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  any ideas?.

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  done4good

  Most people forget that there was a jw "baby boom" starting in the mid '90s. Inasmuch as the borg only counts "publishers" towards their membership statistics, it is no wonder the membership is still on the increase in the US. Most of these kids are now old enough to be forced into becoming a "publisher" in one form or another.

  During most of my years with the jws, (up until around the mid-'90s), it was basically considered taboo to have children, "in this dying system". That all changed with the generation change in '95, as well as the early '90s changes on higher education. Most jws today live lives as "normal" people, imo.

  Normal people eventually leave the borg. The kids becoming pubs today are in that category.

  j
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  39

  Was there any particular song or music u were not allowed to listen to because it was inappropriate or it was deemed demonized?

  by jetery in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i remember there was this heavy metal group called wasp.

  some of the witnesses said it stood for we are satans people and that wasnt even true.

  stairway to heaven by led zeppelin was a no-no because they said if u played it backwards it talked about worshipping the devil.

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  done4good

  I saw them at Soldier Field the last time Jerry Garcia performed live.

  Nope. My bud was at the Giants stadium show two shows before he died in 1995.

  j