Posts by dobby

8

An email to a new person in "the truth"

by biblexaminer in

i wanted to share a few points from an email that i recently sent to a very sincere person.

i think this has value for the dub neophytes in the crowd who lurk here.. to those newbies who, despite having found out plenty about the watchtower, still continue your study and attendance at meetings, i leave you these thoughts.. i understand your thinking, more than you know.

when you take a look at the various churches around, there's not much to offer.

dobby

Wonderful post.

I totally relate. 16 years old - telling my dad (non witness) that I was not going to college but going to pioneer and get ready for the new world. Nothing would change my mind.

He told me "I'd like to hear your opinion on this ten years from now"

Well he was close! One day less than six months ago, more than ten years from his statement to me - it all just disinegrated before my eyes.

I walked away mentally, emotionally and physcially in a moment. Even though complete metamorphis is taking time - the decision was split second.

I think the reason it was so quick was the accumlation of the years of hypocrisy, lies and painful experiences.

28

I feel so guilty

by Leander in

jw
friends

these past few weeks i've spent a lot of time trying to decide how i want to proceed with the rest of my life.

one of my first decisions to carry out is to break free from the wts.

even though i've been a life long witness i feel no guilt or hesistation in leaving the only religion i've ever known.

dobby

Leander-have been reading many of your posts.

This one very moving. You really have one, possibly two issues to sort out...

Do you really love your wife and want to be married to her?

If you don't - do what you gotta do.

If you do - give her a chance. I gave my husband a chance, I told him about my feelings and he as been so understanding and supportive and we are working everything out together. He is even encouraging me to pursue talents and interests I had put aside for years for "the truth".

Good Luck.

5

Help - Trip this Weekend

by dobby in

jw
friends

my husband and i are visiting really good jw friends this weekend.. a little less than a year ago we moved to another state and have since become inactive and have decided that by end of this year we will probably be completely out, no matter the consequences.. we are not afraid of dfing, but i am just not sure how to broach or not broach the subject of our transformation with these friends.

i really like them, when we had trouble a few years back with elders and were "marked" they were the only ones who stood by us.. i think they are going to be really shocked.

i mean, we plan to go to an amusement park on saturday, but the husband may meet us there after he goes out in service (just makes you want to shake your head).

dobby

Jeff - Yes some doubts. That's why I think things could be positive. However, I can see what would happen if we just laid it out for them - probably scare them into "telling on us".

Oh well, I think I just am not a confrontational person. But I am not trying to save this friendship on WTS terms. I like what anewperson said about telling them our friendship is unconditional and leaving the rest up to them.

Just gonna have to bite the bullet and deal with any ugliness. Hopefully we won't have to spring for a hotel. :)

5

Help - Trip this Weekend

by dobby in

jw
friends

my husband and i are visiting really good jw friends this weekend.. a little less than a year ago we moved to another state and have since become inactive and have decided that by end of this year we will probably be completely out, no matter the consequences.. we are not afraid of dfing, but i am just not sure how to broach or not broach the subject of our transformation with these friends.

i really like them, when we had trouble a few years back with elders and were "marked" they were the only ones who stood by us.. i think they are going to be really shocked.

i mean, we plan to go to an amusement park on saturday, but the husband may meet us there after he goes out in service (just makes you want to shake your head).

dobby

My husband and I are visiting really good JW friends this weekend.

A little less than a year ago we moved to another state and have since become inactive and have decided that by end of this year we will probably be completely out, no matter the consequences.

We are not afraid of DFing, but I am just not sure how to broach or not broach the subject of our transformation with these friends. I really like them, when we had trouble a few years back with elders and were "marked" they were the only ones who stood by us.

I think they are going to be really shocked. I mean, we plan to go to an amusement park on Saturday, but the husband may meet us there after he goes out in service (just makes you want to shake your head)

Any suggestions?

4

Overwhelmed by Response

by dobby in

jw
friends

just a quick note...well it didn't end up very quick:).

i posted about my internal struggle with belief in god a few days ago.. unfortunately, with my job and family i am often so busy i can't get to this board for days at a time.. i just saw that there were many responses to my posting.. i want to say thanks to those who offered encouragement and some very good points to think about.. at this time i remain an agnostic with atheistic days.

but if i do settle on a belief in god i can only believe in a simple form of worship, i know i will not be able to accept any "holy" book or traditional form of religion.

dobby

Just a quick note...well it didn't end up very quick:)

I posted about my internal struggle with belief in God a few days ago.

Unfortunately, with my job and family I am often so busy I can't get to this board for days at a time.

I just saw that there were many responses to my posting.

I want to say thanks to those who offered encouragement and some very good points to think about.

At this time I remain an agnostic with atheistic days. But if I do settle on a belief in God I can only believe in a simple form of worship, I know I will not be able to accept any "Holy" book or traditional form of religion. I sometimes feel that if there is a God, he is looking from heaven shaking his head and saying, "why didn't you just love one another, be tolerant of one another?, why have you created all of these belief structures that foster division and pain?"

For truly, if there is anything we can be judged on without more specific and clear communication from God, it is only the Golden Rule.

I think of my son. What if on the day he was born, I didn't meet him personally or talk to him personally? What if I left a confusing book in his room. When he got old enough he asked someone to explain it, because the book seemed to indicate that if he didn't get it right and find me in that book and do what I expected of him, he would die. But everyone he went to gave him a different spin on the book. You can see this analagy (sp?)...I could go on, the book was written by several different people over the course of several years, etc...

I don't get it. Being a parent is what did it for me after 30+ years in the borg. So many things didn't add up.

Anyway, I may post a bit about myself one day. One thing I will say, I am a she not a he (just noticed a lot of people thought I was a he).

Peace to the Board

52

WANTING to Believe in God

by dobby in

jw
friends

has anyone had this experience?.

after letting go of my beliefs as a jw, i felt the only alternative was to be atheist.

or maybe it is just logical to there is no god when i am only listening to my mind and not my heart.

dobby

Has anyone had this experience?

After letting go of my beliefs as a JW, I felt the only alternative was to be atheist. Or maybe it is just logical to there is no God when I am only listening to my mind and not my heart. At any rate, I really felt for a long time there is no God. Even came to grips with the idea that this could be "as good as it gets" and accepted my mortality.

However, lately I just want to believe in God and heaven. Maybe it is a backlash from having the "false religion" concept drilled into your brain. But sometimes I just want to believe the simple idea that God is up there, and will reward us with heavenly life if we simply follow the Golden Rule.

Could it be just that simple?

It reminds me of how I love to watch that movie "While you Were Sleeping" A totally sappy flick with Sandra Bullock. She has no family, and this family of strangers takes her in and even shares Xmas with her. There is a scene in the movie when she is at their house and everyone is opening gifts and they even give her a gift.

It's like I want the fairy tale everyone else has had growing up. Never got to believe in Santa, have Xmas to look forward to every year, a cake with candles, being told everyone you love is just in heaven looking out for you.

Maybe it's just a case of no harm, no foul. If it makes you happy to believe in God - Believe?

8

Smurfs & Cabbage Patch belivers

by JAVA in

jw
friends

i'm reading a riveting memoir of a woman's immersion into fundamentalist faith, and her decision twenty years later to leave it behind.

it's called, this dark world, a memoir of salvation found and lost, by carolyn s. briggs (published by bloomsbury, ny, 2002).

i thought some might enjoy reading the following on pages 190, and 191:.

dobby

It just goes to show -

YOU CAN'T KEEP A GOOD SMURF DOWN!!!

14

armageddon

by Realist in

jw
friends

quick question: .

they say 1914 is the date when the end begins or something like that?

they also say that within the lifetime of that generation armageddon will come.

dobby

I remember when the generation understanding changed. I thought it was far too convenient that it changed around 1995 or so. The bible says a person lives 70 years or 80 if they have special mightiness. I was raised being told that the "the generation that saw the events of 1914" would not pass away before the end came. So many people believed that 70-80 years from 1914 the end would come.

Well...1995... how many years from 1914 is that, hmmm, could it be 81? Then all of a sudden we don't believe that anymore - we now believe Jesus was not refering to a time frame but a "wicked" generation. In other words we now believe that when the end comes a wicked generation will have not passed away. Or something like that, honestly no one understands this anymore.

26

Whats your opinion on the best way to step down??

by Leander in

jw
friends

i know a lot of you here were former pioneers, servants and elders.

how did you go about stepping down?

did you just not say anything, did you write a letter or call one of the elders?.

dobby

Or you could do like my husband did and chew out the P.O.

You won't ever have to worry about steppin' down!

Good Luck!

19

How much $ did you give for CD's, books etc?

by expatbrit in

jw
friends

now i know money is a touchy subject, so if you feel discomforted by these questions, don't answer!.

remember those articles that basically said "some have asked an appropriate amount to contribute for items such as the cd, bound volumes etc.

this crap usually sells for $x in the shops."?.

dobby

My husband and I used to donate $20-50 a month, was in the budget, wrote a check. Of course it was a tax write off at the end of the year, but in hindsight $600 a year was pretty steep. For that much money it seems like we should have advanced to some special "Gold Level" witness or something - go figure :)

I was thinking about RunningMan's comment about the congregation giving $60 per month to the society - may not seem like much but check this out:

63,000 congregations worldwide giving $60 per month = $3,780,000
multiply that by 12 months in a year - $45,360,000

Just another case of a successful pyramid scheme benefiting the people at the very top.