Good for you for knowing that you must learn how to be yourself. I am sure many people go through life never knowing who they are or what they want in life, they have so buried their true nature they don't even know it exists. It's not an easy path if you have been doing only what others expect of you, but it can be done if you are willing to put in the time and effort and the rewards are great.
I highly recommend two things for excavating your authentic self, meditation and journaling. Writing three pages in a journal every day is useful to start picking up the threads. No filters, do not edit, just write down any thing that comes to you, what is important is that you write, not what you write. You can burn the paper when you are done if you feel someone finding it might be a problem, it's the exercise of writing that is important. You are looking for some common threads, bits and pieces of your real self that will poke through here and there. Eventually you will start to see a pattern, focus on that and work with it.
Meditation has proven benefits, it's known to reduce blood pressure and stress and relieve depression. It takes only a few minutes a day, and is not hard. It does take practice, so keep at it every day.
At first it will be difficult, you will experience difficult emotions and it will not be easy, but keep at it and it will get easier with time.
Lisa 🌹
