I had a long talk with my father. And his of the same opinion and finds this really ridiculous. He told me "You know I raised sheep when I cam back from Vietnam. On the Farm. These men don't know anything about sheperding a flock. You know they have special fencing for sheep...most people used to use Cattle fence. But what would happen is a sheep could just poke its head thru those square holes and get stuck. And if you didn't watch them, it would try desperately to get free and eventually cut its neck on the fenceand die. The sheperd would come over and get the sheep out before that happens. Or at least they should."
Yes you're pop is a smart man. Just hang in there bro. I too see the lack of sheparding skills amoung the brothers and that is a real problem within Jehovahs Org today. You mentioned you really have'nt taken this to God like you should have. I suggest now is the time to do so. You are in a vulnerable situation, one that satan will use to his advantage to take you out. Just remember people like David, Job and all the faithful individuals in ancient times when the people in Jehovahs org were unfaithful. My thoughts and prayers are with you!