dawgfan

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Posts by dawgfan

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  31

  Marage in trouble,

  by Heavy Hearted in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  hi have a problem and am in need of help.

  long story short my wife was one when we met, then she quit to be with me, now she has recently started to witnessing again.

  and our marage has suffered extreamly because of it.

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  dawgfan

  It sounds like so far you are doing the right things. Follow your heart. I agree also that an

  ultimatum may not be best decision because that would drive a bigger wedge between you and her.
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  30

  I was baptised tonight!

  by ness21 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  yay!

  i was brought up as a j/w and my mum stopped going when i was a teenager.

  i tried to get back into it as an adult but spent more time in the bible studies arguing, so i kind of realised after a few years it was going nowhere.. spent years just studying on my own cos i couldnt find a christian organisation i felt i agreed with and stayed clear of church cos of so called.

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  dawgfan

  Congrats!
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  33

  WooHooooo!! 1 year clean......

  by crazyblondeb in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  one year clean from meth/ice!!

  i wanted all of you to know what a role you have played in my life.

  i can't even start to tell you what it means to me!!

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  dawgfan

  Good Job
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  31

  Marage in trouble,

  by Heavy Hearted in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  hi have a problem and am in need of help.

  long story short my wife was one when we met, then she quit to be with me, now she has recently started to witnessing again.

  and our marage has suffered extreamly because of it.

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  2. 
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  dawgfan

  You said that you were raised Catholic. I don't know what your (or her family's) religious preferences are now but one place to get the Catholic point of view is Jeff Schwehm's website. He is a Catholic convert from JW. He occassionally posts here. www.catholicxjw.com I don't know your current situation but I thought that I'd post that for you if it would be of any help.
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  31

  Marage in trouble,

  by Heavy Hearted in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  hi have a problem and am in need of help.

  long story short my wife was one when we met, then she quit to be with me, now she has recently started to witnessing again.

  and our marage has suffered extreamly because of it.

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  2. 
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  dawgfan

  If she grew up as a JW or has family that are JWs, then in order to keep the marriage intact and if you love her and want to get her out, you might have to exercise patience (bite your tongue sometimes when you really don’t want to) and take the approach to plant small seeds of doubt here and there (without offending her, family, or the WTS). If its all she ever knew, then you can’t take just assume that you can refute everything all at once and she’ll take it all in. Also, assuming that her family is JW, how did they treat her while she was out. And always consider her feelings about how they would treat her if she ever did leave for good.
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  31

  Marage in trouble,

  by Heavy Hearted in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  hi have a problem and am in need of help.

  long story short my wife was one when we met, then she quit to be with me, now she has recently started to witnessing again.

  and our marage has suffered extreamly because of it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
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  dawgfan

  I understand your situation about the marriage. My wife is a JW while I am not and our marriage is also falling apart. We don't have any children so I can't give you any relevant advice on that issue. But If you've truely given up on your marriage, then what are your feelings about the daughter being raised in a single parent JW household without you being there to provide a balance to the child?
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  29

  I figured out what's up with the golf club!!!! (True LOST fans only)

  by kittyeatzjdubs in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is cool!

  i found out what was up w/ desmond making that lightning rod out of the golf club.. 'k....so.... remember when hurley was going back to the beach and he ran into desmond and was like, "dude!

  you're nekkid, get some clothes!

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  dawgfan

  in the last episode they said they had a "sub" - the galaga
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  29

  I figured out what's up with the golf club!!!! (True LOST fans only)

  by kittyeatzjdubs in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is cool!

  i found out what was up w/ desmond making that lightning rod out of the golf club.. 'k....so.... remember when hurley was going back to the beach and he ran into desmond and was like, "dude!

  you're nekkid, get some clothes!

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  dawgfan

  I use this site to help me keep up with the show
  http://lostanswers.blogspot.com/
• 
  41

  Breaking my silence

  by dawgfan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am a long time lurker (almost 2 years) but first time poster.

  even though you didn't know me before now, i feel like i have known a lot of you for quite a while.

  from my time viewing jwd, i have learned many things and have felt like sometimes that you were talking directly to me.

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  dawgfan

  yeah, this topic comes up once in awhile on other message boards (religious and non-religious) and I've felt bad about not making comments -whether or not I may have made any difference
  
  when I got home last night, i found the new "tract" stuck in my doorway that everyone has discussed - it weighed on me pretty heavy at the time - i decided at that point that if the JWs are going to step up their witnessing then there could be many new victims that are unaware of their techniques - i thought maybe I should become more visible and accessible to others about how living with a JW and the lifestyle that a JW committs to really is
  
  i don't have the perspective that many of you do because I never became a JW or was raised one (although I was desparate enough at one point thinking that I could try to go to meetings or studies that it could save my marriage - im glad i didnt go through with that) but if i could convince only ONE person not to go through what I did, then I could feel a little justified by all the pain
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  41

  Breaking my silence

  by dawgfan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am a long time lurker (almost 2 years) but first time poster.

  even though you didn't know me before now, i feel like i have known a lot of you for quite a while.

  from my time viewing jwd, i have learned many things and have felt like sometimes that you were talking directly to me.

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  dawgfan

  I know that its not completely watchtower policies that are splitting us up. On my side of the equation is all the missed time spent in "Jehovah's" service rather than me and on her side is me not being able to go to the meetings with her and be her spiritual "Head". Plus I'm not perfect and haven't always been but I don't think I've ever been SO bad.
  I know that she wasn't being a faithful witness by marrying me. I seemed idealistic at the time to think that would provide me with an inroad of being able to save her from them.
  I also know that their policies are against divorce because that has torn at her also.
  On the way out: At this point in the breakup, I'm not only looking at all the past mistakes but also about what the future would be for me if it did stay. I don't think its be beneficial to me and my own sanity to stay and if given the choice, I would rather remain single than to think about bringing to life a child that would be raised as a Jehovah's witness.
  Also, her parents are very faithful JWs and she loves them too much to ever lose them. I often internally struggled with what the "fallout" would be if I was able to get her out.
  I don't really ask for anything right now from anyone other empathy. I'd like to think that my contribution would be knowing that I could help others avoid my mistakes.