what if you were df'ed for apostasy - yet you continued to show up at meetings with a big smile, slapping folks on the back and shaking hands with them, raising your hand to comment on every paragraph, even being visibly annoyed when you are not called on?
file a restraining order?
lock the door?
I checked it out here in Toronto... it would cost approx. $3,500 for 1 month including design and installation. I was pretty surprised to see how inexpensive it is to have a bus sign on the public transportation system here. Only $500!
Anyone want to chip in?
Nate
what if you were df'ed for apostasy - yet you continued to show up at meetings with a big smile, slapping folks on the back and shaking hands with them, raising your hand to comment on every paragraph, even being visibly annoyed when you are not called on?
file a restraining order?
lock the door?
I love the newspaper ad idea... but why not think bigger? We could take up a collection and purchase a couple of bulletin boards in major cities across the US - THAT would get some attention.
OHHHHH, and how about bumper stickers??? Something like: X J Dub N Luv N It!
LOL
often xmas is associated with saturnalia by some people.. in fact saturnalia was celebrated 17 december to 23 december.. dies natalis natalis invicti was first celebrated on december 25 in about 270.. xmas trees are first mentioned in 1570.. no connection with paganism there..
I am in AWE of leolaia!!! Your posts here are so detailed and well reasoned. Thanks!
i usually tell them i'm da.i tend to feel like it's my way of respecting their belief that way.when i was a dub i wouldn't have wanted to talk to a df or da ed person.i was at a family wedding a couple of weeks ago and lots of people came up and said hi to me.people who know who i am and know i'm da ed.i was polite and said hi back but i didn't really talk to anyone unless they talked to me first.i'm asking this question because my second cousin came up to me and said hi.he asked how i was doing i said i'm great.then i told him i'm da ed.he said really i said yes it's been 8 happy years since i left.then i walked away.i think i was rude.what do you say when people come up to you and say hi?
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I have not lived in the town or state where I went to meetings for over 18 years, so I never run into anyone that knew me as a JW. When they come to my door, I generally listen politely through their initial opening, and then let them know that I am DF. There's never a need to be rude, and most simply go away quietly - and quickly.
i know of jws that celebrate "family day" at this time of year.
i have asked these jw about where they got the term "family day" was it from the watchtower?
they seem to deny the watchtower had ever mentioned "family day", but i can sense they are trying to hide something here.
My step father was one of five kids, and on each of his sibling's wedding anniversaries (and my grandparent's as well) the whole family would get together. Every child in attendance got a present, as well as gifts for the anniversary couple. We didnt call it "family day," but it WAS like having 6 Xmas's a year!
When my friends at school would feel sorry for me at Xmas time, I used to brag about getting presents all year long, instead of just at Xmas and birthdays. Even as a child, I knew it was a "replacement" celebration.
My step father is a PO now, and so is my uncle.
Nate
how long did you lurk before joining ?and why?.
it took me about a year before joining and posting.. i can sum up my reason in one word,.
fear .
I've been an ex-JW for 18 years now, and the long slow process of healing and dealing with the seperation from my family has all been very, deeply personal. I rarely met or spoke to any other ex-JDubs, and people who had never studied or lived it had no idea what I was thinking or feeling. So I have become comfortable in my isolation. I only recently stumbled upon this website, quite by accident. This is my second post, but I have been primarily reading, and soaking it all in. I had NO IDEA that there was so much info out there about WTS sex scandles, UN involvement, etc. Some of it is quite astonishing to me. Slowly but surely, I am building up my anger and disappointment.
But in most discussions, I dont really feel qualified to give an opinion. And telling my personal stories and experiences feels quite invasive, intrusive. I thought most of these scars had healed.
Nate
a few weeks ago i posted about about how my parents have been asking about wether or not my card has been sent to my "new congregation" since i moved out in july.
up until now, i have been stalling not knowing wether or not i wanted to just come out and say "i have not been going to meetings" or not take any action at all.
well someone left an interesting piece of advice on my thread that i have been contemplating doing.that maybe, perhaps i should just have my card sent to a congregation that isn't anywhere near the actual city i live in.
I'm going to tell you a story, and I may ramble a bit, but I swear it relates. When I was 16, my parents gave me their car so that I could get a part-time job. The first rule was: "If you are driving, and there is a girl in the car, she must be in the back seat. If she is driving, you must be in the back seat. Not because we dont trust you, but because appearances may cause someone to doubt and stumble."
I was closing one night at the fast food restaurant where I workded, and it was very late. One of the older women that I worked with was unable to get a ride home, so I offered to take her. I was too embarassed to ask her to sit in the back seat, and since it was 3am in the morning, who would know? Besides, she was older than my mother. My father woke me at 8am the next morning to ask me "Who is this strange woman was that you were seen driving around town?"
The point is this - it is a VERY small world. You may not be talking to anyone from your past, but that doesn't mean that they wont see you "accidentally." We all know that JW's are encouraged to spy on each other, and the glee that comes from discovering someone doing something they shouldn't. All you are doing is delaying the inevitable.
I have deceived my parents and my "friends" so many times, I cannot even count the ways. It took me a long time to get out of that pattern, and sometimes still find myself lying even when I dont need to. Do yourself a favor - DONT start. You are hurting yourself in ways that are difficult to heal.
