Eric

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Posts by Eric

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  28

  I would like advice from the women on this forum

  by Eric in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i don't believe i've ever started a topic here before.. ladies, ever wanted to play "matchmaker" or "advice for the lovelorn"?

  well, i've got a situation that has me going in circles.

  it's something i'm also talking about with the realtime women friends in my life, and they've been just great, but there is also huge resource of fabulous women here on jwd that will know about that other intangible aspect of our x-jw involvement and how it affects people, relationships and families, that the women i know will never quite grasp.. it is not, however, something i choose to discuss here.

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  Eric

  I am now loathe to respond as it will bring this topic back up the page, and I would rather this debacle die a quiet death. I'd delete the damn thing if I could. But the responses warrant a reply, and apologies.

  little witch,

  I just think your post was odd, and that you were trying to take advantage of female posters for dubious reasons.

  You made an obvious attempt to entice female posters to email you, and I said ''dont hold your breath"

  Egad. Farthest thing from my mind. Didn't even occur to me that my request would be seen this way, but I do see it now. In fact it's obvious now.

  My situation is something I am discussing with the female friends in my life, and they are intrigued and very helpful. We have little group sessions where we hash this and other personal topics out, and I've learned a lot from them and they appreciate the male point of view on some of their issues as well.

  But the one thing missing is an understanding of the x-JW backdrop, and I honestly thought I might find some of that here.

  My tone with you was one of lack of respect. For that I humbly apologise, and I thank you for exposing me to the idea that my post could be seen as duplicitous.

  Stacy and Arrow: I would never trust anyone that pulls this. heck that is how I ended up with a stalker for over a year.

  SheilaM,

  Again, Egad! How could I be so blind?

  No amount of justification from me is going to undo this.

  I can only state that I was being honest and forthright, and had no ulterior motive, and to back that up I request that no one respond to my email address.

  My request for responses is rescinded, but those who have responded can expect a respectful reply.

  Perhaps hanging out in chat here and conversing with women who interest you would be an easier way to get to know someone. Also, make use of the private message feature. The worst that can happen is that they'll say no.

  SevenofNine,

  It was never about trying to meet someone or anyone here. If I were to want that, I'd be open and up front about it. I have no problem doing that. The whole of my interest lies elsewhere, it's just a bit of a delicate situation, and I just didn't want to open up about it on a public board.

  My mistake, I've come across as some rude deviate trying to score with some backdoor endrun, when what I really wanted was an x-JW female perspective on a private matter.

  Still, your advice is the best so far, I can try to see what happens in chat. I can only hope it doesn't come across as a come-on there.

  Eric
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  28

  I would like advice from the women on this forum

  by Eric in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i don't believe i've ever started a topic here before.. ladies, ever wanted to play "matchmaker" or "advice for the lovelorn"?

  well, i've got a situation that has me going in circles.

  it's something i'm also talking about with the realtime women friends in my life, and they've been just great, but there is also huge resource of fabulous women here on jwd that will know about that other intangible aspect of our x-jw involvement and how it affects people, relationships and families, that the women i know will never quite grasp.. it is not, however, something i choose to discuss here.

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  Eric

  Where I'm from, "Don't hold your breath" means Get Stuffed or Forget it.

  I'm not holding my breath.

  I'll take whatever responses I get.

  I made an honest request and Little Witch came back with a jab.

  My response to lw wasn't intended to be mean, just on the same level.

  Capiche?

  Eric
• 
  28

  I would like advice from the women on this forum

  by Eric in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i don't believe i've ever started a topic here before.. ladies, ever wanted to play "matchmaker" or "advice for the lovelorn"?

  well, i've got a situation that has me going in circles.

  it's something i'm also talking about with the realtime women friends in my life, and they've been just great, but there is also huge resource of fabulous women here on jwd that will know about that other intangible aspect of our x-jw involvement and how it affects people, relationships and families, that the women i know will never quite grasp.. it is not, however, something i choose to discuss here.

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  Eric

  bitty witch,

  I'm not exactly holding my breath.

  Unless you want to hold it for me.

  Eric
• 
  28

  I would like advice from the women on this forum

  by Eric in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i don't believe i've ever started a topic here before.. ladies, ever wanted to play "matchmaker" or "advice for the lovelorn"?

  well, i've got a situation that has me going in circles.

  it's something i'm also talking about with the realtime women friends in my life, and they've been just great, but there is also huge resource of fabulous women here on jwd that will know about that other intangible aspect of our x-jw involvement and how it affects people, relationships and families, that the women i know will never quite grasp.. it is not, however, something i choose to discuss here.

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  Eric

  Hi!

  I don't believe I've ever started a topic here before.

  Ladies, ever wanted to play "Matchmaker" or "Advice for the Lovelorn"? Well, I've got a situation that has me going in circles. It's something I'm also talking about with the realtime women friends in my life, and they've been just great, but there is also huge resource of fabulous women here on JWD that will know about that other intangible aspect of our x-JW involvement and how it affects people, relationships and families, that the women I know will never quite grasp.

  It is not, however, something I choose to discuss here. I'm sorry to make this a bit more work, but if you feel like helping, please email me at [email protected]

  All responses will be answered.

  TIA,

  Eric
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  10

  Where Does God Belong?

  by Blueblades in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  do you think that society is starting to move away from religion?.

  first a texas law banning sodomy was thrown out.then the ten commandments were removed from the rotunda of alabama's judicial building.. this question was asked by the christian science monitor:where does god belong?.

  i know he is on the money,"in god we trust",right on the money!.

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  Eric

  God seems to be happy right where He is, in the political clutches of the political right in the west, and in his guise as Allah, happy to be used as a torch to inflame all sorts of death and horror.

  If God should bother to touch my tiny heart, He'd better have a better message for me than He's given these other mongers of slaughter. Something about understanding each other, universal love, forgiving each other, treating each other as brothers.

  Oh, that was the message?

  Tough for God that the message has been so bastardised.

  But easy for me to see a way to be understanding each other, forgiving of faults, to treat everyone as my brother.

  And God need not enter into it. In fact I believe that if God can keep himself out of it, I'll do just fine on my own.

  Eric
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  82

  Who here has a way with women?

  by obiwan in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, i'm know 'm going to take a beating here ( at least i hope so ).

  i am interested in knowing what other guy's "skills" are.

  can you be in a room of women only and get them to talk to you?

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  Eric

  Skeptic,

  I tend to be totally in awe of any woman I fall for. I found out the hard way that this turns women off for some reason.

  I have identified this behavior in myself. I call it "My Puppy Dog Syndrome", and it is so easy to fall into.

  Puppies are lovable, and so they get affection in return. He'll follow you anywhere, and will do whatever you want to do. He's so loyal, and so cute sometimes that he's hard to resist, but who has the time these days to train a puppy. It might break her heart, but eventually she'll put a sign up in the front yard, "Puppy for Sale".

  Much better to be the dog who can hunt for himself, defend every inch of her territory, and still lope along at her side when she wants to go for a run.

  Eric
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  35

  Reckless eyeballing

  by Maverick in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  on another treat some of the ladies commented on the married brothers hitting on them or making sexual remarks to them.

  this brought back to mind the personal custom i had about not looking the sisters over when they walked by at meetings.

  i would look away or down when and sister passed by.

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  Eric

  My simple rule for this:

  You don't stare at the sun. You admire the way she is there so bright, and you can bask in her glow as she passes. But you don't stare at the sun.

  Eric
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  25

  Incompatibility

  by JH in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  in chemistry, certain chemicals react violently to other ingredients and should never be put together.

  if we make a comparison with our everyday lives, do you think that certain people are incompatible with others, and that no matter what they do, they will never be friends?

  have you ever experienced being incompatible to someone?

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  Eric

  I am incompatible with:

  - people who expect that I can read their minds.

  - anyone who interrupts anothers conversation.

  - those who engage in games to stroke their ego.

  - the pre-judgmental.

  - the selfish.

  There is just is no room or time left for me to damp down my dislike and disdain for anyone who is "Me, Me, Me First! " I used to be polite and humour such people, but they take endlessly, and I've got other receptive people in my life.

  To say that I'm incompatible with the greedy, needy self-absorbed is a perfect description.

  Eric
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  18

  Fitting In

  by Descender in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  did anyone else have a hard time fitting in with non-witnesses when you left the witnesses?

  i never had a hard time fitting in with witnesses since i grew up as one, i was always popular in witness circles and could usually strike up an easy conversation with someone as long as i knew they were a witness.

  but i just can't find any common points of interest with anyone anymore since i've been disfellowshipped twice and then finally faded away a year and a half ago.

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  Eric

  Descender,

  "Worldly people" don't want to hear about the JW's from an ex-JW any more than they want to hear about JW's from an actual JW on their front doorstep on saturday morning. At least not until they get to know you.

  There has got to be a million ways to meet great new people. If you went door to door with a real interest in your neighbors, contact your local volunteer service clubs. Unless you are really isolated, there will be a local pancake breakfast, tree planting, bottle drive, variety night or raffle being planned by people who intend to return something to the local community who could really use you.

  After you've established the social contacts and made some friends of great people who aren't counting your hours, and you go ahead and say, " By the Great Moons of Jupiter, I could never have imagined myself doing this two years ago!", they will ask "Why?" And the great thing is they'll really mean it and they'll listen when you explain your restrictive JW past.

  In the meantime, vent what you need to about the JW's here. It's a great part of why this place even exists at all!

  Eric
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  14

  What would you do? Need advice

  by jwbot in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, so, i am 21 years old, a full time student, and i work part time to support my habit (education).

  my s/o with whom i live, is also a student and works part time.

  we all work/play/go to school in the area that we currently live in.

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  Eric

  Jwbot,

  Recent advice from my younger brother, who considers these things carefully, and who speaks from experience of his own:

  If you're going to move away from a socially dynamic, interesting hub of activity to a place of quiet and solitude, it had better be a place in which you find great beauty, or you'll hate it.

  Take it for what it's worth,

  Eric