Posts by jamiebowers

62

How do you deal with depression?

by BlackWolf in

jw
friends

i'm currently going through a bout of depression and my eating disorder has gotten worse.

ever since my parents actually told me that they are going to kick me out when i turn 18 i've felt kind of hopeless about my life.

my parents won't take me to the doctor because the psychiatrists won't have my "best interests" aka jw crap in mind, because really that's the root of all my problems.. i'm wondering if any of you guys have any advice with dealing with depression?

jamiebowers

Your parents are breaking the law for not providing medical treatment for your depression and eating disorder. Please call childrens services or whatever county agency deals with abuse and neglect of children.

Dealing with these two health crises would be difficult for adults in the best of circumstances, but you are young and also being persecuted for your beliefs by the very people who are supposed to care for you. Please don't try to handle this alone. At least see your family doctor, and let him/her know what's going on.

15

Baptized niece crowned prom queen. Could her dad loose his MS appt?

by StarTrekAngel in

so my niece (not thru my brother but rather my wife) had been talking about going to her prom.

the family had privately been somewhat doubtful that she would be allowed to go.

the problem was that they kept promising she would be allowed but history has shown us that her parents tend to get her excited about things and then drop the denial on her at the last minute.

jamiebowers

I don't know about the Hispanic congregations, but this happened to a second cousin of mine in a white rural kh. She was unbaptized, and I don't believe either of her parents held any sort of position. But the elders hounded this poor girl to give up her crown. She told them to go to hell and promptly left home upon graduation.

40

Closer/death/Funerals

by Leela1 in

hello all i am fairly new to this site even though i have been da since i was 16 years old i am now 35 years old.

i have had very little contact with my family since i left maybe a handful of times over the years.

i thought i put the past behind me and moved on i have 4 amazing kids of my own really supportive partner and great friends who have become my family.

jamiebowers

Please read and re-read what Steve2 had to say. Your family rejected you years ago and continue to do so by their silence about your father's illness.

On a personal note, I've had limited phone contact relating to necessary family medical history with my mother who has shunned me for 27 years. She took the opportunity during one of these brief few moments to defend her husband for attempting to rape me when I was 12 years old.

My mother now has cancer and is rejecting medically advised treatment. And, no, I will not attend her funeral when the time comes, because she is a stranger to me.

No good can come from communicating with cult members. They are manipulative predators, who if permitted, will use your kids as the next generation of victims. Write a letter to your father if it makes you feel better. But for the love of all that is holy, stay away from these twisted people.

121

Hey ya'll! My first post. Please help. In need of advice/comfort.

by Stepford Wife in

jw
friends

hey ya'll!

i have been lurking for years on this site and others but never had the courage to post anything.

actually i was afraid of posting on an apostate site in the event i was wrong.

jamiebowers

DJS, medical personnel taking the blood issue to court in the case of emergency regarding a child is too much of a risk. The op's husband taking such a thing to court in the event he discovers a change in said child's medical record is a losing proposition for him.

What, if anything he considers a shot over the bow is his concern and not the op's. He needs to live by Watch Tower rules if he wants to be a jw. He is his wife's spiritual head, not the elders. He can impart their words of wisdom to her if he so desires.

In any case, the op is a grown woman living in a free country. She has the power to make decisions for herself and her daughter. Her husband is also free to get the courts involved, but to what end....to show the authorities that he wants to force his daughter to abstain from blood and attend religious meetings?

His priorities are in the wrong place if he is only worried about holding onto his position. The op's priorities are to keep her daughter and herself safe from disastrous emotional and medical decisions.

6

Anyone from NE Ohio ?

by Freeandclear in

jw
friends

hello all, i'm wondering if there are any ex-borg members in here from the north east ohio area?

specifically warren, youngstown, niles, and surrounding areas.. feel free to private message me if you are still "in" and want to remain anonymous.

i personally grew up in the warren tod heights congregation and know a lot of people from this general area, it would be nice to reconnect.

jamiebowers

Hello! I've been out for 28 years and never was a jw while living in Ohio. If you're still in Warren, I'm probably about 10 miles from you in Newton Falls. I'll pm you my contact information.

121

Hey ya'll! My first post. Please help. In need of advice/comfort.

by Stepford Wife in

jw
friends

hey ya'll!

i have been lurking for years on this site and others but never had the courage to post anything.

actually i was afraid of posting on an apostate site in the event i was wrong.

jamiebowers

Please be sure to inform your doctor about your new stance on the blood issue. It's important to have it in your medical record in the event of an accident. And do the same for your daughter.

Discuss with your husband how important it is to him to remain an elder. He should be running interference between you and the elders. And make a deal with him about your daughter...either he accepts her inactivity or you will simply refuse to meet with the elders, and then he'll lose his position.

113

I just found out that my youngest brother committed suicide

by SnakesInTheTower in

jw
friends

my middle brother called me a couple of hours ago.

our youngest brother, josh, who was 38, was found by his friends in his apartment.

he hung himself.

jamiebowers

So sorry, Snakes.

18

dating even though not scripturally free to do so

by seekingadvice in

wondering what to think...i'm recently divorced from my jw spouse ( i was never a jw).

we have a 11 year old son who is being forced to attend meetings and have all the beliefs that ex has.

i'm constantly being told what i should do and i'm supposed to go along with ex on whatever he says because apparently the "head of the family" continues after divorce in his world.

jamiebowers

Good for you for putting your foot down about no jw activites for your son while he's with you. Since your son seems to be in turmoil about his father's behavior and cult activity, take your son to counseling. It can help him deal with the trauma, and it will provide a record for probable future court action. Print out those text messages for leverage. Show your ex that the only person he can control is himself. Take full advantage of the law, (arrest, restraining order, etc.), if he becomes threatening or violent.

Your main concern is your son, not placating this overgrown baby. He thinks he has the world by the ass; when in reality, you could cut him down to size with a few swipes.

18

dating even though not scripturally free to do so

by seekingadvice in

wondering what to think...i'm recently divorced from my jw spouse ( i was never a jw).

we have a 11 year old son who is being forced to attend meetings and have all the beliefs that ex has.

i'm constantly being told what i should do and i'm supposed to go along with ex on whatever he says because apparently the "head of the family" continues after divorce in his world.

jamiebowers

First of all, who has custody of your son? If you have at least joint custody, then he shouldn't be forced into jw activities/beliefs while with you. Having proof of your ex's relationship is a HUGE bargaining chip for you to gain custody if you don't have it.

Second, your ex is bound by secular law, so he isn't head of you and wasn't even when you were married unless you let him. He sounds like a hypocritical, sanctimonious asshole.

Get custody of your son if you don't already have it, and limit his association with the Watch Tower cult as much as possible. Risk of being reported to the elders should be great enough for your ex to comply. And do not give him freedom to remarry based on a lie. I wouldn't even give it to him if/when you're intimate with someone else. That is nobody's business but yours.

16

Adjusting

by cognac in

jw
friends

just feel like i could never make it on the outside world.

i was never able to adjust, except in being a mom and in business.

those are the only things that i feel strong in.

jamiebowers

You're living your life on your own terms without the judgment of family and lifelong friends. With that also comes a lack of support. But good things like true friendship, and love of any kind, don't come easy. Give it some time, and eventually you will find more than what you've lost.