Posts by SnakesInTheTower

28

Elder's message to me, on me being disfellowshipped tomorrow.

by whereami in

jw
friends

it saddens me greatly to see all that has happened and to see my friends in this position.

for me its a great loss but i hope that it will only be temporary.

please allow jehovahs discipline to mold you and youre way of thinking.

SnakesInTheTower

whereami...

congratulations on the beginning of the rest of your life.

As to the realities of relationships... fortunately I met my fiancee after I left the JWs, so I do not have to deal with the issue you have with your hardcore JW wife. My JW mom is issue enough, so I do understand some of what you are facing. For some reason I have yet to be DF, though they have plenty on me (though I would love it if they would DF me for apostasy...the worst of the worst offenses in their eyes...LOL).

I also understand life from that elder's point of view having been an elder until shortly before I left the organization. However, in my opinion....email has made it too simple to take the easy...and cowardly...way out of a friendship. An in person visit -- by himself, in blue jeans and a tshirt...not a suit and tie -- would have been more genuine. His email shows he is mind controlled by the cult. The fact that he sent that to you at all is surprising... it is going off the reservation. Once a decision to DF has been made by the elders, independent contact like that email is generally not acceptable to the Organization. Who knows, maybe there is doubt in that ones mind.

Wish you the best with your wife...do not give up...there are many here who gained their hardcore JW mate.... I met a couple at the 08 Apostafest in Toronto where one was in and the other out for a long time? I forget who it was...thought the poster name started with a P....crap...I forget....

Snakes (Rich )

25

Do You Constantly Think About The Witnesses At This Point in Your Life?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i was just talking to a guy who's been df'd for years and he still talks about things like it was yesterday in watchtowerland.. are you still consumed by your jw past?.

SnakesInTheTower

NO

However, my mom is a dub, so it is still there a bit.. and she speaks less and less to me as time goes by. Being hundreds of miles apart (12 hour drive) exascerbates that. She told me a couple of weeks ago that she will not discuss Spiritual Things® with me anymore and that is what made us close as mother and son; friends; Spiritual Brother® and Sister®.

Apparently she has nothing but DNA in common with me anymore so she rarely calls me. When I call her, she puts me on speaker phone to talk to her UBM (my stepfather), who I, for awhile I liked a lot, but recent events show me that he is crude, sexist, and stuck in the 60s.

I see dubs occasionally in the area, but few reach out to speak to me, and when they happen across me I speak to them as if there is nothing wrong... and with me there is not. MY life is great post-JW.

My fiancee and I want to move away from this area maybe in a couple of years..but less and less dubs and their stuff mean nothing to me. I come here because there is more to people than just JW stuff. I received support and hopefully can occasionally still give it.

Snakes (Rich )

22

Do you like Sunsets? why?

by cyberjesus in

jw
friends

people like to stop and appreciate a sunset.... but what is it they enjoy?

what do you enjoy?

who say its beautiful?.

SnakesInTheTower

my fiancee toni and I along with our 9YO went down town alton to the new ampitheater.... all of the fountains were on... he played in the ground fountain until it timed out...(about 10 min) and she and I watched the beginning of the sunset together for another 5 or so...we had to get home for dinner...crock pot gave us time to watch the sunset....

i dont know why i like them.. I just do.....

====<<< my avatar is a sunset ...more peaceful than the snake that used to be there. I took the pic on my way home a couple of years ago on the way home from Arkansas (to see fellow JWDers purps and RF)....

Snakes (Rich )

71

Notes from my Judicial Committee (I was DF'ed at the end)

by notverylikely in

these are the details of my disfellowshipping.

the names and locations have been changed to protect the innocent and the guilty.

my errors are not hidden in an attempt to make me look better, this simply is a presentation of the facts that led up to the disfellowshipping and a re-telling of the contents of the meeting.. .

SnakesInTheTower

NVL...

I was wondering about when this was going to occur. Lost track after the WW game on the other board.

They read several scriptures, there were hugs, some tears (I've known all of these men for years and they ARE sincere and kind in their own way) and then I was sent on my way with no closing prayer.

Interesting. All the JCs I was on, it was very cold among the elders once the decision to DF was made. There may have been tears, even genuine tears, during deliberations and after the so-called "offender" left, but no emotions were displayed when giving the decision to the person. Maybe there are some humans after all in the cult. I can say that in most cases, I went home and cried after DFing people (some people deserve the boot, but only because they were just generally lousy human beings). I hated judging people. Glad I do not have to do it anymore.

Isn't it also sad that the JC cannot even bother with a closing prayer in hopes of turning a person around? I guess the JCs believe that holy spirit has left the building as long as that person is still in the room

Enjoy freedom, walk away from the cult.

Snakes (Rich )

41

How common is swinging among JWs?

by JimmyPage in

jw
friends

my wife and i recently heard about two couples we know who switched partners in the past.

we then got to talking about a different couple we ate dinner with a while back who i thought gave off the vibe of wanting to swing.

my wife said she got that vibe too... thus the question: how common is this in wt-land?.

SnakesInTheTower

I mentioned this before.... two couples who were considered "Exemplary Publishers™ were DF for swinging. Wife swapping.... they were apparently rehearsing for their parts on the District Convention drama.... how that conversation got started we will never know...but they were doing the deed together....did their part on the drama...and were caught and DF a few weeks later.

The Society always assigns individuals married to each other to parts that involve married characters... and though there are cast rehearsals, there are often, because of time and distance, rehearsals only involving a portion of the cast. This is where the foursome came together.

The group was from somewhere in Southern Illinois and the DC was (I believe) in St. Charles...this was just a few years ago....sometime between 2000 and 2006. Not so exemplary anymore I guess.

Snakes (Rich )

25

My Latest to the Editor

by AK - Jeff in

dear editor:.

the letter below is somewhat longer than most you run in your newspaper, i know.

i hope you will run it however, as painting the picture of cults and their insidious control is not something that can be done in a few words.

SnakesInTheTower

Good job... a letter like this is best suited, not on the "Letters to the Editor" page, but as a column as a guest editorial. This is a more common way to hand lengthy letters. What you have to watch out for is that they edit the letter down to under 500 words to get it into the space allotted and take away important information or remove context. Again, excellent job.

Snakes (Rich )

By the way, my word processor says your letter is exactly 800 words. On quick glance I could knock 100 words off without losing anything. Hope it gets published.

30

Did you ever have the Elders check out a prospective marriage mate 4U?

by Open mind in

or, to your knowledge, did anyone ever make any inquiries of your local elders as to your "spiritual health" and suitability for courtship?.

how'd that work out for you?.

om.

SnakesInTheTower

I had been asked by a couple of different sisters about prospective mates in my KH. I told them they need to learn for themselves and really get to know these brothers and not be in a hurry. One sister, who was a friend of mine, asked about my then best friend. I told her that he has "quirks" and she needed to find them out for herself and then decide. She asked what those quirks were. I told her: Be careful. (I knew he tended to the male chauvenistic pig side, this was my long time friend.) She asked him out. They dated, got married. She found out he was a MCP. They have been seperated for 8 years now. I told her to find out. He didnt hide his bad qualities well. She put on blinders.

In my own case, I didnt ask for the permission or opinion of the BOE, but the PO did write a letter to my ex-fiancee's BOE in India. Her (or more likely her MS brother in the US) request. The PO provided a good report. Her BOE sent one on her to me. I checked out her backstory (which was so wack it needed verifying) with Service Dept. in India. They verified anything I asked (but did not volunteer additional details). Of course, anything coming out of those BOE's in India was suspect. Her first husband was "Verified" by his BOE....only to find out after they got married that her husband was inactive and...more importantly, physically, emotionally, and sexually abusive. Turns out her MIL had bribed the BOE with alcoholic gifts. She was stuck for a few years in a bad marriage to a "Verified" Brother™. As you all know.... I missed the bullet on that one.

I am now engaged to an intelligent, funny, beautiful decidedly NON JW woman now.

Snakes (Rich )

18

Is school back in session where you live?

by compound complex in

jw
friends

greetings, back-to-school-community dwellers!.

i just heard the high school bus rumble by.

if i time my excursions on the road properly during the coming semesters, i will stay ahead of the school buses picking up/depositing kids throughout the day.. if a parent, are you really ready, once again, to start making lunches, going to soccer practice, volunteering in class?.

SnakesInTheTower

the 9YO starts 4th grade tomorrow (Aug 18). School starts 15 min earlier and ends 10 min earlier..around 210pm. School starts at 8am now. They only go until 10:30am tomorrow. What is the point of that? For the bus riders, they are running a full bus schedule 2 hours apart? No wonder the school budgets are in trouble. For 2 hours? And why start on a Wednesday? Dumb.

We were supposed to get him into an after school program run by the YWCA at his school three afternoons a week, but the Y emailed and said the state has not finished their licensing quite yet. They were not prepared for an earlier start date.

We had him meet his teacher last night...but since he is in the gifted program for the district, we knew his teacher in advance. His 3rd grade teacher is next door to his new 4th grade teacher...so good communication is already in place. (He cant get by with anything. His 2nd grade teacher heard about his not wanting to read this summer already and caught him in the hall last night ...lol)

So yes, I am ready....I have been primary caregiver this summer during the day. My work schedule is flexible...and going to his g'parents is not so much fun...so I was able to keep that to a minimum....

Snakes (Rich )

42

I have renounced atheism: I now believe in God!

by Awakened at Gilead in

if you don't believe me, watch my latest video debunking atheism!.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjs9yblgupq.

cheers!.

SnakesInTheTower

marking for Toni to watch later.....

she always says I will be struck by lightning talking like this....

,,,,I tell her His Noodliness will protect me....LOL.

Snakes (Rich )

35

Do Elders and Bethelites really follow this site?

by jamesmahon in

just a question really and whilst i would not put it past them i sort of feel it is too 'conspiracy theory' for me.

are elders and bethelites officially sanctioned to lurk (or engage) in this or other sites to try to weedle out apostates?

does anyone have any direct experience of it happening?.

SnakesInTheTower

if they did I would have been DF long ago. Just google "Snakes" and "SnakesInTheTower" along with the site address in advanced search. My real name is here somewhere. My picture definitely is.

I know that individual elders in the congregations do, but those are not officially sanctioned, but also not discouraged, by the Society.

One poster here had reams of their personal blog posts (not posts from this forum) printed out by our young tech-savvy PO in the course of his private investigation (ie, witch hunt). There really was nothing in those particular blog posts that should have gotten that person DF. The PO took the info to the elders (including myself), had already gone to the PO before he came to us (other than his elder/former PO father), and the CO instructed the elders to form a JC, which was to include all of the elders (ie loyalty test). JC came back to DF. Individual appealed and lost of course. It was a witch hunt through and through. I had tried to give the person the heads up, but that horse had already left the barn.

Rule of thumb: If you dont want people to know, don't post it on the internet, not even in the so called private boards or via email. It can always be cut and pasted elsewhere and forwarded and/or printed out.

Snakes (Rich )