hmmmmmmmmmmm.....that's a tough one. i think i'd definitely have to go with affection. personally i can't really have one without the other. i'm not affectionate with someone i wouldn't want to have sex with and i wouldn't have sex with someone that can't be affectionate. affection is so much more of a personal gesture....a true emotional connection. even though is does open you up to be more deeply hurt, i think it's worth it.
beck