Posts by FourMs

i have stopped all jw activity since a few months and as mentioned in other posts, i am being stalked by every elder and car group looking to stretch their service time.

when they come i just ignore them by not answering the door (or the phone when they call).. today they came (for the 3rd time in 3 days) and when i went outside a few hours later my neighbor was out front of his house and after some small talk, he informed me that i had some dressed up people come to my door.

FourMs

Thanks OnTheWayOut, I was thinking about doing something like that just today. Great minds think alike...

Take care and thanks for your help...

FourMs

21

Would I be dfd if?

by FourMs in

jw
friends

well, let me fill you in on a few things first.

i have stopped all jw activity since a few months and as mentioned in other posts, i am being stalked by every elder and car group looking to stretch their service time.

when they come i just ignore them by not answering the door (or the phone when they call).. today they came (for the 3rd time in 3 days) and when i went outside a few hours later my neighbor was out front of his house and after some small talk, he informed me that i had some dressed up people come to my door.

FourMs

I suppose the elders are in a position to do just about anything if they feel like it, but they don’t really have anything on me.

jwfacts, you’re right that they could get me on that point in the insight book.

I think if I bumped into an elder at the grocery store, I’d be fine to tell him a little tidbit, like what a few of you have said, just that I am figuring a few things out and if I need their help, I’ll call them. For some reason, coming to my house unannounced is very inappropriate in my opinion. I find that ironic because bothering people at their doors unannounced was a big part of my life (every JW’s life).

Thanks for your thoughts…
FourMs

21

Would I be dfd if?

by FourMs in

jw
friends

well, let me fill you in on a few things first.

i have stopped all jw activity since a few months and as mentioned in other posts, i am being stalked by every elder and car group looking to stretch their service time.

when they come i just ignore them by not answering the door (or the phone when they call).. today they came (for the 3rd time in 3 days) and when i went outside a few hours later my neighbor was out front of his house and after some small talk, he informed me that i had some dressed up people come to my door.

FourMs

OUTLAW: Did they ever end up df'ing or da'ing you?

FourMs

21

Would I be dfd if?

by FourMs in

jw
friends

well, let me fill you in on a few things first.

i have stopped all jw activity since a few months and as mentioned in other posts, i am being stalked by every elder and car group looking to stretch their service time.

when they come i just ignore them by not answering the door (or the phone when they call).. today they came (for the 3rd time in 3 days) and when i went outside a few hours later my neighbor was out front of his house and after some small talk, he informed me that i had some dressed up people come to my door.

FourMs

Arthur: An elder here tracked down and called my dad who lives in another country, and got some info from him. My husband has talked to elders on a couple of different occasions when they have come. So for them to keep at me is getting on my nerves…

I don’t feel like I need to inform them of anything. I have bumped into ones from the hall on numerous occasions as well, so people know that I am alive and well. So, that’s all. I know it must look strange to my neighbors that I can’t seem to tell these ones to leave me alone, but my reason in not talking to the elders is because I don’t want to be cornered. I really don’t believe in the JW stuff anymore, but would like to maintain my relationships with family.

I know that there is a level of concern when one goes “missing”, but to me, they are more like the police…

21

Would I be dfd if?

by FourMs in

jw
friends

well, let me fill you in on a few things first.

i have stopped all jw activity since a few months and as mentioned in other posts, i am being stalked by every elder and car group looking to stretch their service time.

when they come i just ignore them by not answering the door (or the phone when they call).. today they came (for the 3rd time in 3 days) and when i went outside a few hours later my neighbor was out front of his house and after some small talk, he informed me that i had some dressed up people come to my door.

FourMs

Well, let me fill you in on a few things first. I have stopped all JW activity since a few months and as mentioned in other posts, I am being stalked by every elder and car group looking to stretch their service time. When they come I just ignore them by not answering the door (or the phone when they call).

Today they came (for the 3rd time in 3 days) and when I went outside a few hours later my neighbor was out front of his house and after some small talk, he informed me that I had some dressed up people come to my door. I told him that I knew they were there and that I was ignoring them on purpose. He said he had seen them before and wondered why they keep coming by. I told him briefly that I used to be a JW and now that I am not anymore, they won’t leave me alone. He told me several times that he would tell them the next time they come that I don’t want them to come anymore.

So, I am asking if you think that a message like that to the elders, that is coming from someone else, would get me df’d? My neighbor was very serious and said that he would come across the street and get rid of them for me. I am friends with his wife but barley ever talk to him, so I thought it was awfully nice of him to offer his services.

But, as we all know, in doing this it could be detrimental to my status. As of right now, my family doesn’t really know what’s going on with me, just that I have missed mtgs and memorial.

Obviously ths is open to all, but curious if any ex-elders have opinions on this one?

Thx
FourMs

91

Sister Pioneer and Her 10 Year Secret of Porneia

by bluesapphire in

jw
friends

when i was studying, the sister who studied with me was a pioneer and as "righteous-overmuch" as they come!

i wasn't even baptized and she was already pressuring me to pioneer since i didn't work.

nevermind that i had three little girls all under 4!!!.

FourMs

It’s quite possible nothing will even be done. My husband and I fooled around a lot before we got married and never really thought twice about it. We knew it was wrong, but not enough to stop. After we were married about 5 years, I was doing my WT and it was about repenting from immoral sins and I felt really guilty about what we had done all those years before. I arranged to meet with my PO and was crying my face off in front of him telling him what we had done. My husband wasn’t willing to go with me, so here I was spilling my guts over things that had happened so long ago.

He said he was going to talk to the other elders and they would meet with us to settle the situation. It took 7 MONTHS for them to come! I lost so much sleep and was in agony over what was going to happen to me. I even called to remind him and asked when he was coming over. He just kept putting me off. So all this time I didn’t know what to think. I was sure they were going to DF us as I didn’t really know how these things worked.

By the time they came, he basically just asked us if we were sorry for what we did. We said yes and then it just turned into a one sided shepparding call where the PO blabbed about all kinds of crap. We barely even spoke the whole time. And after all was said and done, neither of us lost any privileges.

All that to say, if ever your story comes out in the open, they may just leave it and sweep it under the rug because it’s been so many years that have past.

FourMs

17

Elders on my tail

by FourMs in

jw
friends

as mentioned before, i have not been to a mtg since january.

i have not spoken to anyone in the congregation about my decisions as of late and i dont plan on informing anyone either.

i have had the elders at my door at least once a week for the last few months and every car group out in service that needs to fill in some time are stocking me here too.

FourMs

They are STALKING you not STOCKING you. Sorry.....it just bothered me.

Heehee woops - I think I need to go back to school. Thanks for the correction...

17

Elders on my tail

by FourMs in

jw
friends

as mentioned before, i have not been to a mtg since january.

i have not spoken to anyone in the congregation about my decisions as of late and i dont plan on informing anyone either.

i have had the elders at my door at least once a week for the last few months and every car group out in service that needs to fill in some time are stocking me here too.

FourMs

If you don't talk to the elders, how do you know what they told your family?
Did the family or the elders tell you?

All I know is that this elder from my hall called my dad. My sister gave me his name because my dad went through her to talk to me. But no, nothing was said to me as to what the elder told him.

It's weird because I have been away from my parents hall for 10 years and lived somewhere before here for 8 years and the elders have the nerve to go back to my parents?!!! I don't get it. What am I, 12?

Anyways, thx...

FourMs

17

Elders on my tail

by FourMs in

jw
friends

as mentioned before, i have not been to a mtg since january.

i have not spoken to anyone in the congregation about my decisions as of late and i dont plan on informing anyone either.

i have had the elders at my door at least once a week for the last few months and every car group out in service that needs to fill in some time are stocking me here too.

FourMs

As mentioned before, I have not been to a mtg since January. I have not spoken to anyone in the congregation about my decisions as of late and I don’t plan on informing anyone either. I have had the elders at my door at least once a week for the last few months and every car group out in service that needs to fill in some time are stocking me here too. If I’m home I just ignore them by not answering, and if my husband is here he answers and cuts things short by saying I’m not home.

Well, the memorial came and went and I had a few stockers here to leave me a tract but still I had no contact with anyone. For a few days I thought that they had stopped harassing me. Not a chance. I got a call from my sister (who is still a JW) who told me that my dad got a call from an elder from my hall. I know y’all don’t know me very well, but I am a country away from my family (20hours or so) and the elders decide to pull a “I’m telling on you” stunt. How childish. I wonder why they do that? Can they not just leave me alone? Why did they inform my parents? I am 32 years old with a family of my own here. I feel like the elders doing something like that is comparable to someone from my work informing my dad that I’m not doing my job. I think it’s totally unnecessary on their part.

In my first post I mentioned that I was nervous to confront my parents with my decisions. I came to the conclusion that I would just tell them if they ask instead of bringing it up. That way it comes across that I don’t feel “guilty” like they think I should. I feel none of that anyways. So, here I was all nervous and finally it’s been all these months that have passed and I haven’t even talked to my parents other than a few emails and chatting a bit on msn. I feel they are hiding their heads in the sand and don’t want to hear about what’s going on. Now that the elder has done my job of informing them, I suppose I am off the hook. It’s annoying just the same, but now I don’t have to tell my parents. I’ll wait for them to call and inquire about what’s going on.

Has anyone had them do that, where the elders track back to where you came from? What will they do from here on? Just keep stocking me? I supposed they are just looking for answers, but I am not willing to give any.

Sorry to vent, but thanks for reading...

FourMs