Posts by StephaneLaliberte

22

I think circuit overseers should have a job like the apostle Paul

by forzaitalia in

am i being mean, thinking that travelling overseers should get a part-time job like paul did, in order to not be a burden to the congregation?

i wouldn't put my hand up when we were asked to raise it if we were happy to give £50 from congregation funds to the c.o.

so that he could take his wife out for a meal.

StephaneLaliberte

it was becoming legally helpful to keep a Roman Catholic hierarchical structure in place

AAHAHAHHAAH - Love it!

22

I think circuit overseers should have a job like the apostle Paul

by forzaitalia in

am i being mean, thinking that travelling overseers should get a part-time job like paul did, in order to not be a burden to the congregation?

i wouldn't put my hand up when we were asked to raise it if we were happy to give £50 from congregation funds to the c.o.

so that he could take his wife out for a meal.

StephaneLaliberte

At face value, I would agree, but you have to consider that:

Paul didn't report to anyone.
He wasn't married.
He didn't visit congregations often. In fact, he only made three trips in his career.
He didn't write that many letters or give that many talks compared to the COs.
I wonder about his door-to-door activity?

When you read his letters, you read them back to back, but fail to remember that they cover a period of 30 years! Not that I expect everything to be reported, but 3 trips over 30 years!! Compare that with today's Circuit Overseers (COs) who spend their lives, along with their wives, on the road. Sure, some of them have semi stable places like an appartment linked to a convention center or a kingdom hall, but a great deal of them need to move from one place to the next on a weekly basis. Then are expected to be in field service full time reporting their hours and preparing talks and organizing meetings for pioneers and elders and field services and the list goes on.

And with all this, they only get 2 or 3 weeks of vacation per year! Imagine, you have a job that pays so little that the government don't tax you, makes you work around 50 hours a week with a schedule spread through evenings and weekends and no retirement plan.

I find it difficult to complain about them getting too much money when these people are probably the most dedicated and selfless individuals on the face of the Earth.

That being said, are they needed? Nope. They could do as much as the Apostle Paul did, which isn't that much compared to everything they do. The reality is that true Christians don't need that much control. However, religions, any religion, desire greater control over people, and controlling people takes time. So they end up paying individuals to work full time for them!

32

Do you play the LOTTERY?

by Fisherman in

jw view gambling as a sin and sadly people get addicted to gambling causing them financial and health problems.

but is playing a couple of bucks a week on some lottery tickets actually gambling?

what do you have to lose?

StephaneLaliberte

I do, I buy lottery tickets from times to times and I go to the casino on occasion.

My take on it is that I pay for the "dream", for the possibility of getting rich or making some serious money. I know that the odds are so against me that the chances can be rounded off to no chance at all, but what if? What if I'm one in a million on that day?

So, that stupid question cost me about 7$ in lottery tickets per months and 400 to 600$ per year at the casino. That's how much that thrill is worth to me based on my finances today.

Unfortunately, some people take it too far, believe in lady luck, or that God himself could literally spin things in their favor and loose everything! Some even hang themselves in the bathroom stalls of the casino that took them everything.

21

Aftermath of being Reinstated

by TxNVSue2023 in

i'm in the process of being reinstated ( my df'ing story is on here).

because i've never been in this position before, i don't know how i will be treated once i'm reinstated.

i moved to a new city/state and i don't know a single person here or in my new congregation i am attending.

StephaneLaliberte

Honnestly, as much as I'd like to complain about JWs, it really depends on the congregation you have. My whole family has gone through this process at one point or another and they feel very much accepted in their respective congregations. It really depends on the friends you make in that new congregation.

In fact, my family went back precisely for their friends. They weren't able to make any friends outside of the JW and that is one of the main reason they are back in: for that social circle.

Perhaps you'll be happy after all!

For my part, I left because I stopped considering the JW as a social group and considered their teachings and how close to Jesus and God they actually are. Their disfellowship practice and the way they put emphasis on the wrong teachings is what drove me out. Eventually, I did make friends outside of the JWs.

The only thing I can hope for you is that you won't personally apply harmful teachings even if you go back in. Such as ignoring someone the minute they no longer share your belief and leave the group. Or believing that you have some moral superiority over all non JWs, going as far as calling them non believers good for eternal destruction.

There is a lot of good in people of various faith and the fact that people believe different things that you do doesn't mean that they are non believers. They are believers; just not in the same things you believe in.

I hope you the best and peace of mind.

77

Disfellowshipped for Fornication

by TxNVSue2023 in

hi i want to tell my story and get advice.

i'm a single sister ( in usa) that has been baptized for 20 years.

i came from the world, so did not grow up in the truth and i have no family in the truth -- i am alone.. last year i met a brother & we did have premarital sex while we were dating.

StephaneLaliberte

You may be tempted to say: "Well, it was only this particular Judicial Committee and, had I sat before another group of elders, the answer could have been the other way." This line of reasoning would lead you to believe that the fault lies with the three men who sat as judges over you, rather than with the Jehovah's Witness religion. However, I implore you to reconsider.

Getting married is clearly an act of contrition; you took a definitive action to right the wrong. Furthermore, you did it in a very brief and hurried period of only 3 weeks! If you sincerely believe this, then consider the fact that the Jehovah's Witnesses as a whole don't. Otherwise, this would be mentioned in one of the endless religious materials that they produced in the last century. Thousands upon thousands of people lived the exact same scenario since the early days of that religion, and they never once took a proper stand, purposefully leaving it to the local elders. Hence, the religion as a whole is responsible for the disfellowshipping decision, not just the three elders.

Understanding this should lead you to reconsider your desire to join back into a religious group which clearly ignores the most important part of Jesus' teachings: Love and compassion. Consider all the speeches where Jesus denounced the pharisees for upholding the law to a fault and compare this to what just happened to you.

Actions are more important than beliefs. It is more important to show love than to believe in prophecies. It is more important to show compassion than to believe that the Holy spirit is not part of some trinity. It is more important to support one another than to go out preaching about doing these things. Case in hand, the Parable of the Two Sons in Matthew 21:28-32. You are judged by your actions, not by what you say!

JWs, like many other religions, tend to switch the narrative. To put importance on the beliefs rather than the actions. They feel the need to do this as this is what generally sets them apart from other groups. The truth is that love, compassion, kindness, empathy, etc., are things that can be found in individuals across all faiths. These are human traits, and this is where many believe that humans have been created in the likes of God; in these qualities. However, trying to keep the cohesion of their groups, many religions like the JWs, will uphold teachings above these Godly traits. This is precisely what Jesus was denouncing when he talked to the pharisees!

Finally, leaving the JW doesn't mean you need to leave Jehovah. JWs would want you to believe this, but in the end, if they are unable to practice the basis of Christian faith, than, staying with them will lead you further away from him. They become blinds leading blinds and all will fall into a pit. (Math 15:14).

I hope you the best and sincerely hope that you will take actions to stop further harm being done onto you by both religion and unfaithful mates.

65

WT and Higher ED

by enoughisenough in

watched this video and was wondering if any of you recall seeing this video besides on this presenter's youtube platform.

anyway, watch it !

it is disgusting but enlightening.

StephaneLaliberte

Thing is, its not so much about higher education as it is to simply do what you want to do in life. Some people want to be doctors, engineers and business managers. Others want to be carpenters, electricians, plumbers. You need university for a profession and college for trades. Yet, JW basically draw the line at college. The reality is that once you're married with children, which often happens in the mid twenties for JWs, parents need to work full time! Considering that full time jobs represent, say, 30 years at 40 hours a week, why do they narrow down their dream to jobs they might not even like or be good at in the first place? Its ridiculous.

23

All the Old JW Acquaintances Passing Away

by StephaneLaliberte in

yesterday, my dad told me an older sister passed away.

she wasn't too old (in her 60s), but i knew her 30 years ago and haven't seen her in 15 years; the main reason being that i faded 10 years ago.. yesterday, i seriously considered attending the funeral and catch-up with old jws i used to know.

after thinking it over, i decided against it.

StephaneLaliberte

Yesterday, my dad told me an older sister passed away. She wasn't too old (in her 60s), but I knew her 30 years ago and haven't seen her in 15 years; the main reason being that I faded 10 years ago.

Yesterday, I seriously considered attending the funeral and catch-up with old JWs I used to know. After thinking it over, I decided against it. I fear it could give older JWs a chance to reach out, try to convince me to return, and intrude on my "faded JW" status.

It's sad that I can't properly grieve someone I once liked due to the cult's dynamics. Now, as I think about others who passed away or are getting older, I realize I'll miss many funerals. These individuals played a significant role in my upbringing and contributed to who I am. Attending their funerals would show respect and appreciation. But the potential family drama and ultimately, even the risk of disfellowshipping, outweigh my responsibility to pay respects.

All to say that even after 10 years of freedom, I'm reminded that I'm not truly free from that cult.

27

A Jehovah's Witness in a relationship with a non-Jehovah's Witness

by KShelton in

my name is kevin shelton.

my wife is a jehovah's witness.

my two children are jehovah's witnesses.

StephaneLaliberte

I'll even go a step further: I'm willing to bet that this woman loves her man, and they are indeed happy, but not as happy as they could be.

There is cognitive dissonance happening here due to the fact that Watchtower keeps repeating to her that inter-faith marriages don't work, despite her being in one!

If her husband forces her to confront that paradox, she will double down on one side over the other. If she doubles down on recognizing that she is in a happy, loving relationship, she will feel liberated, and this will result in even more love and happiness.

I've known a JW woman married to a non-JW. At the Kingdom Hall, many treated her as a victim. For years, I've seen her act as if she remained with him because "marriage is sacred." Then, when the man took his retirement, something changed; they did many more things together, and that loving spark grew between them until he passed away years later. My point is that all those 20-some years before that, she could have accepted the fact that she loved him and wasn't a victim of anything but love. They could've had 20 more years of that loving spark.

In the end, JWs say with their lips that "marriage is sacred," and then willingly destroy the joy, love, and happiness out of inter-faith marriages. You want to say that a marriage is sacred? Then make sure it is a priority in your life, and you keep that loving flame burning.

27

A Jehovah's Witness in a relationship with a non-Jehovah's Witness

by KShelton in

my name is kevin shelton.

my wife is a jehovah's witness.

my two children are jehovah's witnesses.

StephaneLaliberte

suggeting he ends his marriage just because she has a different view on the Bible. - ExBethelitenowPIMA

It's not about view point, its about who he is and who she is!

The OP said that he got into a heated argument with his wife on the idea that a JW can have a relationship with a non-JW. This is exactly what their own relationship is. Take away religion, let's use politics instead: A Republican father had a heated argument with his Democrat wife because she believes that their son will not be happy if he is with a Republican woman. How about this: "I'm an African, my wife and I fell in love when I was on a trip to America, but the other day, I heard my wife tell our kid that he won't be happy unless he marries a white American girl."

Am I starting to make some sense? How can you insist that a relationship is doomed to failure if your own couple is the living proof of the opposite? Unless she feels that the only reason she remains married is out of faithfulness to JW's standards of upholding a marriage, even if it means being unhappy for the rest of your life.

I believe that marriage is sacred, and you should work very, very hard to make it work. Constant communication, faithfulness, love, tenderness, all that jazz. But if you try all this and, after several years, the prevailing feeling is that there is no love, only commitment, no happiness, only obligations, then you are wasting your life away.

Let's assume here that the OPs marriage is just fine. They are both happy and and in love. Considering this, how can his wife have a "firm conviction" against interfaith relationships. If her point of view was, "Listen, if both believe in the same religion, it will be easier...", yes, she does have a point! But to be "firmly" against it when she, herself, is living in this sort of arrangement goes against the reality experience by both her and her husband.

27

A Jehovah's Witness in a relationship with a non-Jehovah's Witness

by KShelton in

my name is kevin shelton.

my wife is a jehovah's witness.

my two children are jehovah's witnesses.

StephaneLaliberte

If there is one thing I've come to realize over the years with any religious people is that you can't explain their belief using their sacred texts. You say: The bible or Coran says this, and they'll say: Yes, but it also says that. And then you end up in an argument where the ultimate authority is not logic, but some thousand year old book that can be understood one way or another.

I find that relying purely on logic is often much better. Ask your wife what kind of relationship you have with her. If she finds plenty of positive things, then ask why that would not apply also to your son. If you are a happy couple, then you are the living proof, first hand account, that their rule is senseless.

If she can't find positive things and you find that you've been unhappy for several years, then, perhaps its time for you to make your own way. If she begs you not to leave, than ask her what's the point of saving a relationship if she doesn't cherish it.

If you do end up leaving, then, you'll have time to explain to your kids your views on relationships that is not dependant on the adherence to any religion.

I know, this sounds complicated, but it is not. It is hard to handle, very hard, perhaps devastating, but its not complicated.

When your wife questions the validity of relationships where the basis is identical to yours, its not complicated.